Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

[Southie]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

Shorts can be dangerous - market is up 67% of the time.

Short at your peril. You could lose your shorts in the process.

Thank you.

[Southie]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@geminifromkhi

One vice leads to another

In some cases vice leads to President. In others vice gets thrown out of office.

The only term vice leads to vice is if successful in reelection.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Reha

You can be defensive or you can be realistic.

This is kind of an example…where the actual suggestion of things gets people really upset. If it happens, it happens behind closed doors and whatnot but its never talked about.

Now if you’re comparing US Pakistanis to PAK then I have to say…I’d say its pretty even. Families here are much more conservative than people in Pakistan think because the older generation was so stuck in their ways (in a good way)…they didn’t want to assimilate completely. Average people here don’t walk around in bikinis on a daily basis. Yes there are modern ones though just like there are in Pakistan. No difference.

Yeah obviously I understand. Never said everyone is into it.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Reha

Did you know that most people in the US are wary of going to Pakistan to marry because of green card scams? Men and women alike.

These are what I’ve heard from my friends:

I don’t want to teach my wife how to use a vending machine (honest…this is what he said)

Do the girls use deodorant?

What if the guy is backward?

These are not my opinions - merely using as examples.

There are fears on both sides actually to be honest…not just one. If I were you, I’d stick to what I know - which is in Pakistan. But realize that what you hear is the negative…just like the stuff I posted is the negative. You have no reason to hear the positive because its not juicy gossip.

Yes I know about the green card story and its sick of course.
But on the other hand you also have Pakistanis who live a gora life all these years and then come to Pakistan to get a wife.
So yeah it goes both ways.

[Reha]

All good points.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Southie

One more Arithmetic issue.

50 person time 9 is 450. That is one day. Now calculate the number per month. Use a 8x multiplier tl account for overlap. Calculate over a year. Use 2x multiplier. Calculate for last 6 years. Use 2x multiplier. Or 32x.

32 tike ur 0.05 is 1.8 pct. Closer to the 1 pct I came up with.

By the way, whither the markets?

Answer= South.3142[piesquare]

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Southie

In some cases vice leads to President. In others vice gets thrown out of office.

The only term vice leads to vice is if successful in reelection.

Wow how do you come up with such thought provoking stuff. Mind=Blown

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Reha

I don’t want to teach my wife how to use a vending machine (honest…this is what he said)

Do the girls use deodorant?

What if the guy is backward?

No she doesnt use a deodrant, but in my opinion she is still tons better than people who drink sharab (made from rotten grapes yuck!)

And well the guy is so backward he never had a girlfriend in his life.

Different perspectives, you see.

[Southie]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@geminifromkhi

Answer= South.3142[piesquare]

I think I deservedly got pie in my face?

[Reha]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@geminifromkhi

Yes I know about the green card story and its sick of course.
But on the other hand you also have Pakistanis who live a gora life all these years and then come to Pakistan to get a wife.
So yeah it goes both ways.

@geminifromkhi

No she doesnt use a deodrant, but in my opinion she is still tons better than people who drink sharab (made from rotten grapes yuck!)

And well the guy is so backward he never had a girlfriend in his life.

Different perspectives, you see.

That’s my point here. You can’t possibly think American Pakistanis are this or that because if you do…generalizations can be and are made both ways.

Pakistanis that come to Pakistan to get a wife don’t live a gora life…they live a life that is a bit more westernized but not entirely either…that is why they want a Pakistani bahu. Someone who can keep their culture alive in their children. If they were entirely goray…they would want an American Pakistani for their kids to maintain a certain lifestyle.

As for the second part, its not my opinion at all…these are general impressions of people who when suggested to go back to Pak to get married…have.

Average Muslim families here don’t drink sharaab or club or date like you might think. Average Pakistani families are way too concerned with their image in front of other Pakistanis since our communities here are small and everyone knows everyone. People socialize and interact at their local mosques and rumors spread like fire. Families here are under a lot of pressure to keep their kids in line, religious and focus on education…they don’t have time anything else.

My sister has 3 kids…her eldest is 8 years old…my niece’s day starts with namaz, Qur’an class and then she proceeds to go to school, go to Karate class, come home, do homework, do her chores, eat dinner and go to sleep so she can do it all the next day. On the weekends, they spend all their time together as a family doing things they don’t get to do as a unit during the week.

Our routine growing up was the same…where do you see the time or inclination to smoke, do drugs, drink, party, have sex or even hang out? Life here is not what you people think it is…its fast paced and no one has a second to spare on things that aren’t important.

Sure, there are people who drink but they are so few that I don’t see how anyone can look at them as the norm…its like saying all Pakistanis are dying for a green card, lie, cheat and bribe. Is that true? Would you sell your soul for a green card or a chance to come to the States? If not, then the same goes for us here. When I watch Dawn and see those reporters busting businesses for selling poison in the form of snacks to people…should I think all Pakistanis are like that? That they’ll do anything for some money?

No one is better than anyone…dilon ka haal sirf Allah janta hai. Behtar hai ye kaam Allah tala pe chor diya jai.

If you have so many reservations about Americans, the answer is simple: don’t marry one. It will be too hard to trust someone and the adjustment alone will be enough to drive someone nuts. I’d marry where I am comfortable if I were you. You know Pakistanis and the environment very well…don’t leave a place where you already have something good going.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Reha

Pakistanis that come to Pakistan to get a wife don’t live a gora life…they live a life that is a bit more westernized but not entirely either…that is why they want a Pakistani bahu. Someone who can keep their culture alive in their children. If they were entirely goray…they would want an American Pakistani for their kids to maintain a certain lifestyle

But if, according to you, most Pakistanis arent living the gora life, and parents keep them in tow, why bring a bahu from Pakistan to ‘keep the culture alive’. Why not marry their son to a Pakistani American girl? Is it cos they dont trust them enough?

@Reha

My sister has 3 kids…her eldest is 8 years old…my niece’s day starts with namaz, Qur’an class and then she proceeds to go to school, go to Karate class, come home, do homework, do her chores, eat dinner and go to sleep so she can do it all the next day. On the weekends, they spend all their time together as a family doing things they don’t get to do as a unit during the week.

Listen almost my whole family, and all my cousins live abroad. So I’ll be the last one interested in pointing fingers or making a generalization.

Just like you told me about your sister, let me tell you about a kid there. She is the kid of someone I know, and as soon as she leaves home, she changes clothes. Her mum will never find out that her girl who leaves in seemingly modest clothes, turns into a slut once outside. But then obviously even over here there are girls who leave home in burqa and take it off once outside.

But my question is how many places will a girl here have to go versus girls living abroad. There are only so many places you can go here in fitted, revealing clothes, unlike the west where everyone dresses like that.

Anyway, listen I myself am feeling bad after writing all this. Somehow this thread has become judgmental, and I am not liking that.

I’ll conclude by saying that my only point is that in west you have more liberty, more peer pressure, and it’s easier to slip there. And when you are 16, 17 its hard to control yourself.

[Reha]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@geminifromkhi

But if, according to you, most Pakistanis arent living the gora life, and parents keep them in tow, why bring a bahu from Pakistan to ‘keep the culture alive’. Why not marry their son to a Pakistani American girl? Is it cos they dont trust them enough?

Actually, after the scams that happened in the 90’s and early 2000’s…the imported brides have decreased in number. I am seeing more parents understand their kids and honor their choices which is great obviously.

There are still people who go back to Pakistan but its because of other reasons now…they don’t have enough family here or they’re not social enough or they just don’t have a developed circle to be able to trust another family or they have someone in their family already in mind.

Sure, its hard to control teenagers but they’re doing it and making it happen. I will say this…I used to be shocked when I met people who had dated in Pakistan. They were the ones who told me it happens and its common. These are not very rich families either…they’re average families that come from fairly religious backgrounds.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@Reha

Actually, after the scams that happened in the 90’s and early 2000’s…the imported brides have decreased in number. I am seeing more parents understand their kids and honor their choices which is great obviously.

There are still people who go back to Pakistan but its because of other reasons now…they don’t have enough family here or they’re not social enough or they just don’t have a developed circle to be able to trust another family or they have someone in their family already in mind.

Sure, its hard to control teenagers but they’re doing it and making it happen. I will say this…I used to be shocked when I met people who had dated in Pakistan. They were the ones who told me it happens and its common. These are not very rich families either…they’re average families that come from fairly religious backgrounds.

Ok.

[eastern11]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

True, lots of people are looking for girls right here in the US, because they find it tedious to go look for someone in Pakistan due to logistics and also that their kids might not adjust mentally as well. Yes, there are all kinds of people everywhere. The sharbai ones one etc. but the average ones are like. @Reha described, studious to the core, religious, heck a little boring I must say!

[strangeworld]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@geminifromkhi

Before you read on, I must clarify that I am not pointing my fingers on anyone here, just curious.

When I was listening to the podcast Serial, I was kinda shocked to find out that the protagonist Adnan and his best friend Saad were sleeping around. Saad mentioned this on the podcast, when he could have easily hidden this bit of information.

And then I stumbled upon this forum. I guess most members are from US/Uk/Canada. Sleeping around and drinking doesnt seem like a biggie. Like OK I understand where you guys grew up everyone was doing it, but didnt you know it was totally impermissible? And because you were growing up in such an environment, shouldnt your parents have been more vigilant?

AGAIN, I am not trying to be a goody two shoes here, I am just curious as to how things are over there, and how westernized Pakistanis living abroad have become.

At least I will think a thousand times before marrying someone from UK/USA now. Especially after the claims that most guys there are like that.

That’s a fact for sure but is that happening more in the west as compared to Pakistan? That’s a good discussion.

First of all only a handful of people are living in countries you mentioned when you compare it with the total population of Pakistan.

And people who are saying such things happen in Pakistan they’re actually denying the proportional element of the reality.

Let’s suppose the total population of Pakistan living in Pakistan and abroad is 100. Now around 10% are living abroad and 90% living in Pakistan.

Now see what’s the average of drinking/sleeping around in both of the ratios. You’ll be shocked to see that only 10% of people living abroad are doing such things equals to 90% of the people in Pakistan.

So yes that’s a very valid consideration from your side, if you’re looking for a man/woman who has a clean past you can easily find those in Pakistan and there’s no doubt in that. But when it comes to west it’s either never known or extremely hard to find someone like that.

Don’t listen to whatever other people are saying because most of them belong to the countries you mentioned and it’s 100% normal for them to act crazy at this question.

[geminifromkhi]

Re: Morals and \ethics of Pakistanis living abroad

@strangeworld

That’s a fact for sure but is that happening more in the west as compared to Pakistan? That’s a good discussion.

First of all only a handful of people are living in countries you mentioned when you compare it with the total population of Pakistan.

And people who are saying such things happen in Pakistan they’re actually denying the proportional element of the reality.

Let’s suppose the total population of Pakistan living in Pakistan and abroad is 100. Now around 10% are living abroad and 90% living in Pakistan.

Now see what’s the average of drinking/sleeping around in both of the ratios. You’ll be shocked to see that only 10% of people living abroad are doing such things equals to 90% of the people in Pakistan.

So yes that’s a very valid consideration from your side, if you’re looking for a man/woman who has a clean past you can easily find those in Pakistan and there’s no doubt in that. But when it comes to west it’s either never known or extremely hard to find someone like that.

Don’t listen to whatever other people are saying because most of them belong to the countries you mentioned and it’s 100% normal for them to act crazy at this question.

Yeah I know I was shocked when people acted so defensively. Like if its not happening, just say so.