Re: Moral/ethical dilemma - what should I do?
Honestly this particular situation wouldn’t bother my conscience at all. Yes I know how the culture back home is. But we’re still talking about an adult woman who has been told directly by her husband that he wants a divorce. There is a point people need to take responsibility for their own choices and not blame culture or lack of warning for their own [further] misery. I have a lot of sympathy for **ConfusedMe yet she herself admits that even IF someone had told her about the white GF, she still would not have called things off immediately and tried changing the husband’s mind!
DO NOT (!!!) put words in my mouth!
Muzzy asked…
To that I replied…
I just hope that by sharing my story, I am saving some other girl from the hell i went thru.
I wouldn’t have called things of immediately, but I would have told everyone that I needed more time to decide. I would have talked to him, also gone and visited my in-laws in the country where they live with my parents. And if I still had gotten married to him, I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant thats for sure! I love my daughter and I don’t think I would have made it thru this hell without her, I love her more then anything and she is no doubt the best thing that has ever happened to me. But I which she had a father. A good man, not just a father. But she doesn’t and that the only thing that bugs me. That I wasn’t able to give her a god father.
Meaning that I would have looked into things into his life, his family, his behaviour etc. I would have done my research before ending things. I wouldn’t have ended things because of an anonymous email. I would have made sure that I was making the right decision, whatever the decision had been.
I would NEVER have tried to “change” him, I don’t believe that people like that can be “changed”.