Since so many people seem to think that it is absolutely natural for men/women to “appreciate” members of the opposite gender, to these people I pose the following question:
How many people have you actually come across who have modesty in their gaze?
For the girls, such people would be easy to recognise, because these men do not speak to you with a level gaze, rather they look elsewhere when talking to you and hence don’t make you feel uncomfortable in any regard.
Re: Modesty in gaze
You're not serious with the last part, are you?
I don't even...
Re: Modesty in gaze
Sadly, not many 
Probably like 2-3 in my whole lifetime 
Re: Modesty in gaze
How many threads are you going to open on the same subject?
Re: Modesty in gaze
it's in the ballpark but isn't the same thing.
if you don't like them, don't read them.
the mods are there to trim the excess threads.
if they think they are fine, then you shouldn't have to be concerned.
How many threads are you going to open on the same subject?
Re: Modesty in gaze
Since so many people seem to think that it is absolutely natural for men/women to "appreciate" members of the opposite gender, to these people I pose the following question:
How many people have you actually come across who have modesty in their gaze?
For the girls, such people would be easy to recognise, because these men do not speak to you with a level gaze,** rather they look elsewhere when talking to you and hence don't make you feel uncomfortable in any regard**.
hain??
doesn't it mean that the guy is shy and looking elsewhere and not looking directly into your eyes??
Re: Modesty in gaze
My father is anything but shy, nomi. And mashallah he acts this way around my friends even. And they comment on this saying they feel comfortable around him cos of it.
hain??
doesn't it mean that the guy is shy and looking elsewhere and not looking directly into your eyes??
Re: Modesty in gaze
[TABLE=“width: 100%”]
Re: Modesty in gaze
The only guys I've noticed talking to me "modestly" are the ones who either stare at my feet or the ones who are looking at another part of the anatomy. The ones who are looking at my feet are the ones who act all modest in front of the hijabis and muslim girls, but don't have an issue being less shy with the white girls.
What is up with that? We're not the ones you need to be shy with!
Re: Modesty in gaze
That usually only happens if you're talking to a molvi..
Re: Modesty in gaze
Modesty relates not just to one's gaze, but to one's words and actions. Keeping one's gaze down is not proof of their sharafat. And that applies equally to men and women. As I've said before it goes to a person's neeyat.
Re: Modesty in gaze
My father is anything but shy, nomi. And mashallah he acts this way around my friends even. And they comment on this saying they feel comfortable around him cos of it.
what?? your dad acts what way?
Re: Modesty in gaze
For the girls, such people would be easy to recognise, because these men do not speak to you with a level gaze, rather they look elsewhere when talking to you and hence don't make you feel uncomfortable in any regard.
Hmm interesting. Actually I'd feel more uncomfortable if a man looks elsewhere while talking to me. I've noticed some older people do this though, now I understand why.
Re: Modesty in gaze
wait. theres something in the eyes. guys who make me uncomfortable are those who stare (not look). u know like theres osmething telling me to run away .also i dont like anyone looking too much into my eyes. i am socially awkward like that
In my opinion guys who look away deffo must be not trying to look at what they 'want' to look at- so ders no real modesty der- just control. A guy i know who looks at me modestly wud be a friend- he luks at me wen talking and his eyes dont wander about.. Dats more comforting than someone looking around- i prefer eye contact.
Re: Modesty in gaze
I don’t make eye contact with them.. ub modesty ka kese pata chalay 
:k:
My chachuz and cousins act this way..
Re: Modesty in gaze
Even if people do not believe it exists, it does. And, if a person is not genuinely hypocrite, obviously such gestures make up one’ personality. I don’t know why someone who is modest in their gestures and habits will be considered a MAULVI. Maybe we have gone too far away from the religious and moral values which were considered adornment back then, look odd and mockable.
Demesne, the men of my family, being dehaati people, consider it odd to look into the eyes of the opposite gender. So I can claim that Alhamdolillah I have seen modesty in gaze of my family members, cousins and men in general. Good or bad, I think its one’s value system and doesn’t look or sound odd if and when its an inevitable part of one’s system.
Like few posters above believe if someone is being modest in their gaze, they are faking it and whatnot. Well then obviously everyone’s observations and experiences vary. When a particular element is not present in your society or circle, you will find it odd and alien.
As for others, I myself haven’t really ever stared into someone’s eyes to notice whether they are staring back or not 
Re: Modesty in gaze
Same here! 
Re: Modesty in gaze
I don't think anyone is denying that some men and women do observe nazron ka hijab. But the comment I was making is that this is not the sole determining factor of sharafat and "apparent" modesty of one's gaze is not an assurance of a decent person. And much the same way, looking at/glancing/observing someone doesn't mean that such a person isn't shareef. There is a difference between observing and ogling.
It's making generalizations that is being challenged.
Re: Modesty in gaze
^True.....just like praying 5 times a day is not enough to determine whether someone is a decent person.