Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
*beauty is subjective. * everyone looks presentable to some degree.
It's like saying do men marry doctors to show off they're doctors.
sucha generic thread.
not so much
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
Marriage for the sole point of a trophy spouse aside, I reckon it's less superficial/arbitrary to marry/judge someone for earning potential than it is to marry/judge someone for looks. Earning potential is a variable which can be shaped with education, willpower, mental prowess, whereas we don't have control over the genetics that inform our beauty.
which of the two would you prefer then?....being liked/wanted/chosen by the opposite sex for your earning potential OR your looks ?
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
which of the two would you prefer then?....being liked/wanted/chosen by the opposite sex for your earning potential OR your looks ?
Right on!
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
Doesn't seem like to me your asking a question, but looking for someone to side with your perception of why you think men get beautiful women...
THIS.
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
not so much
if only your opinion mattered to me.....
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
which of the two would you prefer then?....being liked/wanted/chosen by the opposite sex for your earning potential OR your looks ?
None of the above. A better question would be what would I prefer being rejected for. Let me clarify this : If women are generally appraised for their beauty, and men are generally appraised for their earning potential, who faces a greater disadvantage when they are lacking in the same? The woman who can't change her face or standards of conventional beauty, or the man who can go back to school/change careers/get a promotion and change his earning potential? Which compliment is more meaningful - being acknowledged for things in your sphere of influence, or being acknowledged for what you're born with? Which slight is worse - being rejected for not being in the right income bracket, or being rejected for being ugly?
Needless to say dealing in either/or absolutes is limiting, but the point was to view superficial decisions in relative terms. e.g. If you notice, I said one was less arbitrary than the other, not that one was arbitrary while the other wasn't. I also said trophy spouses aside - meaning a single trait isn't the ideal basis for a lifelong decision.
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
None of the above. A better question would be what would I prefer being rejected for. Let me clarify this : If women are generally appraised for their beauty, and men are generally appraised for their earning potential, who faces a greater disadvantage when they are lacking in the same? The woman who can't change her face or standards of conventional beauty, or the man who can go back to school/change careers/get a promotion and change his earning potential? Which compliment is more meaningful - being acknowledged for things in your sphere of influence, or being acknowledged for what you're born with? Which slight is worse - being rejected for not being in the right income bracket, or being rejected for being ugly?
Needless to say dealing in either/or absolutes is limiting, but the point was to view superficial decisions in relative terms. e.g. If you notice, I said one was less arbitrary than the other, not that one was arbitrary while the other wasn't. I also said trophy spouses aside - meaning a single trait isn't the ideal basis for a lifelong decision.
being rejected for looks feels worse than being rejected for earning potential. Our looks are much closer to us than our material possessions, earning potential or status. Similarly being wanted/liked for looks; being complemented on our looks gives us a contentment that is like no other. Which compliment is more meaningful is a separate question.
It would be appropriate to view this from the choosers perspective. Choosing/marrying someone for looks is a far more honest thing to do than it is to choose/marry someone for earning potential. The latter contains an element of disingenuity and seeing the other as a means to an end. The decision is too dependent upon the choosers circumstances. On the other hand a person who chooses/marries someone for looks & beauty, albeit shallow, intends to desire the other and treat the other as an end.
The motives behind choosing/marrying for looks and for earning potential are very different. It would be fallacious to compare the two bases on a scale of superficiality. But yes, both lead to the same 'lifelong decision' called marriage.
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
I would say religion (specifically Islam) advocates the position for men to seek a beautiful wife. Perhaps some say to keep him interested and devoted. And this word "beautiful" in this context means what is beauty to the beholder - and the caveat is that a man should be mindful that if she is too beautiful in comparison to how he views himself then he may be subjecting himself to the fitnah of being tested by whispers that make him suspect his wife, but by ensuring she is beautiful enough to keep him after her and treating her with love.
Men other than those who may want to show off their wives may otherwise be fearful that they will get jealous of their friends for having prettier wives and as a result seek out someone very pretty not to compete but to avoid being jealous.
Men are shallow - that is why women do shallow things to appeal to us ...
Women are security conscious - that is why men seek to be rich, strong and stylish to appeal to them ...
However if we were all noble - then a man would not be shallow and lower his gaze and seek out piety in a woman and a woman would seek out piety in a man ... as the basis for marriage ... looks are secondary considerations ... a wise set of parents will seek to pair up their children with people compatible with their lifestyle and similar in their aesthetic appeal.
Re: Men who marry beautiful women...
psyah just spoke my mind. Yes religion does favour prefering a beautiful wife. And why not, if a wife with a beautiful heart is comfort for the soul, a wife with pretty face is comfort to the eyes. And then it is chronic too. Women have always been most famous for their beauty (like Helen and Cleopatra and so on) and Men for the wars and wealth. Why would I disapprove of a man wanting a prettier wife? I honestly dont see anything bad in it. Well there is enough room for less pretty ladies too. Just as we cannot make every girl marry a poor guy in the same way it isnt fair to condemn someone only because he wants a better looking wife. Something of aesthetics too. There are men who marry for their own happiness and contentment and not in order to exhibit their possessions.