Men who marry beautiful women...

[uzair1]

Re: Men who marry beautiful women…

@chaibiskut

None of the above. A better question would be what would I prefer being rejected for. Let me clarify this : If women are generally appraised for their beauty, and men are generally appraised for their earning potential, who faces a greater disadvantage when they are lacking in the same? The woman who can’t change her face or standards of conventional beauty, or the man who can go back to school/change careers/get a promotion and change his earning potential? Which compliment is more meaningful - being acknowledged for things in your sphere of influence, or being acknowledged for what you’re born with? Which slight is worse - being rejected for not being in the right income bracket, or being rejected for being ugly?

Needless to say dealing in either/or absolutes is limiting, but the point was to view superficial decisions in relative terms. e.g. If you notice, I said one was less arbitrary than the other, not that one was arbitrary while the other wasn’t. I also said trophy spouses aside - meaning a single trait isn’t the ideal basis for a lifelong decision.

being rejected for looks feels worse than being rejected for earning potential. Our looks are much closer to us than our material possessions, earning potential or status. Similarly being wanted/liked for looks; being complemented on our looks gives us a contentment that is like no other. Which compliment is more meaningful is a separate question.

It would be appropriate to view this from the choosers perspective. Choosing/marrying someone for looks is a far more honest thing to do than it is to choose/marry someone for earning potential. The latter contains an element of disingenuity and seeing the other as a means to an end. The decision is too dependent upon the choosers circumstances. On the other hand a person who chooses/marries someone for looks & beauty, albeit shallow, intends to desire the other and treat the other as an end.

The motives behind choosing/marrying for looks and for earning potential are very different. It would be fallacious to compare the two bases on a scale of superficiality. But yes, both lead to the same ‘lifelong decision’ called marriage.