dude, i know what you mean..the dining scene at some desi events can be rather comical if you step back and observe. you see the aunty stampede for food..
other observations
desi uncles acting like they are some kind of jacques costeau, and the serving spoon some kind of deep sea explorer rather deep qorma explorer to dig for the target piece of chicken. then you also see the qorma hockey with uncle ji performing some amazing dribbling techniques in trying ti navigate the boti from the far end of the serving dish to their side while avoiding the other predatory spoon in the way..Wayne Gretzky would be impressed, so would shabaz and saleem sherwani.
then there is the crafty mr spock uncle, who decides that it is only logical that he take the serving spoon from a less desirable entree, like salad, and teleport himself over the line and straight in the middle of the qorma hockey.
he is met there with a 14 year old mcguyver who has dcided to use his own spoon to start filling his plate..
close your eyes and listen, the cling cling of the serving spoons and it seems like some sort of medieval wars…the battle of biryani in full swing..
then you see ladies..acting like war generals and sending their kids for acquisition mission sorties…especially for nan (and dessert later cuz they dont want to be seen taking their third helping of ras frikkin gullas)
then you see desi musical chairs, no matter where you were sitting, ppl will use this opportunity to change seats on the fly and you find an entire new crew hanging at your table as if nothing is going on.
later we see ppl carrying 3 cups of soda with a ear to ear grin on the face as if tariq aziz just announced that they had won inaami bond from millat fan. the rush to the drinks is as if it was not coca cola but the fountain o youth..
and then there is dessert, the entire guest population becomes cirque de soleil acrobats balancing 3-4little plates of assorted dessert and weaving through the crowd like devin hester going for a touch down or zidane dancing around a hapless teams entire defensive line.
then ppl sit around bored..too full to move…doing very good jabba the hutt impersonations involuntarily …mounds of left over food in their plates looking like some kind of culinary armageddon took place…or the guys from DTX, bluto, d-day, otter and co had a toga party, or that the huns swept through some event..
in this disaster of a scene the ruqsatti finally starts, and ladies who were all having a blast all of a sudden on cue start crying..
I mean what manhoos scene..a destroed place, ladies crying in bakri tones..kids wailing cuz they are grumpy and its way past their bedtime, waiters and serve staff cursing everyone and praying for the torture to end..limo driver saying to himself, never again, never again..
if desi shaddi type events were in black and white and sped up a little, it would look like some brown charlie chaplin movie..
that movie…while smoking a blunt would probably be funny as hell