All good now..
^Hahahaha 
(ok I’m breaking my own rules here, serious again)
Shinoo, here is another girl for ya in the thread :)
Hmmm.......If I knew how to meet people and was successful with it, I would be hitched by now myself :D Everyone else here has given you great advice. I am not sure if you already mention this somewhere, but do you work?school?with desis?(assuming you and your family are looking for a desi guy only :) ). I would think your workplace/school would be a good place to start with. ALso, as everyone else mentioned here, go out to get-togethers with friends, family etc. My sister's friend was seen at a 14 August melaa by some family. THey in turn told a relative who was looking for a girl, and they got married in less than a year MaashaAllah :)
Also, I have heard a lot about ISNA but I am not sure I would be comfortable getting oogled at. But thats just me.
So, yeah I am having the same problem. I have tried leaving everything to my parents but its not that easy. I live away from my family, and we dont have a lot of Muslims here so my probem is different. But if you live in a Muslim majority area, it shouldnt be that hard to find a decent guy InshaAllah.
Good luck! :)
shinz,
well i am certainly not an expert on this but here is what i have observed from other girls who are in the same position as u r.
since u are not club or bars kind of person, try to socialize in the uni , participate in different groups, MSA perhaps ( they have eid dinners and gatherings that are quite civilized and organized as well, they also organize iftaar parties and other get togethers etc). basically get involved in uni. dawats, weddings and other such events. ur work place can be another place. start with light conversation with everyone.
i hope this helps.
I haven't read the whole thread.
It is quite difficult meeting someone on your own. I don't know ... I think you have to be approachable. That is the tricky part. Be one of those girls that guys have no problem approaching. Don't ask me what that is cause I have no clue.
What Suroor says is true. Join in activities where you are more likely to meet people and network. Make sure you enjoy it though .... and don't make meeting a guy your only focus. You are only 22/23 and I know you say you are ready .... but make sure you make time for yourself, do stuff you enjoy too instead of making getting married your sole goal. :)
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK! As Ira said, if I knew I would have been hitched myself too. I know what not to do though. Do not look cold and oblivious of whats and who is around you. Do not ignore people who are paying you attention. Do not avoid eye contact if the person making it looks somewhat desirable. Do not gang up with friends in large groups at all times or they won't dare approach you. Needless to say that is how I normally behave.
Do look warm and approachable. Do smile. And once you get talking don't get excessively casual and informal.
Actually find someone to give you better advice. Im awful.
Awww Femme you gave good advice, dont say you didnt! :)
But I have to dis-agree with you on some things: I would advise ppl to be "themselves". I mean, why pretend, to catch someones attention? If you have a "casual" attitude, then thats who you are. If you like/dislike making eyecontact, then do wahtever you feel comfortable with. But these are my opinions though.
Testing Waters..
Shino- First know what kind of things you want in that person to be, be realistic. Let your mom look wherever she does. Lets see who approaches you etc.
I am not sure what are you doing that is scaring the poor guys away [just kidding].
Let me give you an example of my cousin. She didnt have many guys approaching her and ask for rishta. It turned out the moment she changed herself men were throwing themselves on her feet. She changed her dressing style, hair, etc. We may think we look nice but one should be physically attractive.
Please don't get me wrong. Mashallah i have seen you, You are very beautiful Mashallah. May be you want to change something so people will approach you more. After that try to get to know them. This world isnt for those who are shy :~).
This is like the most difficult decision ever. Spending lifetime with someone. Finding your soulmate isn't that easy or a good life partner.
I hope that helps a little *hugz
I would advise go out and make more male muslim friends... I'm guessing you don't have any otherwise you would not be asking how to meet someone.
Honestly most of you guys and girls don't seem to mix at all and then one day you think you are ready to get married and should just start looking for someone you like the same way you'd shop for something in a store!?
You can learn a lot from whatever friendships you make and chances are the more friends of the opposite sex you have the more realistic your expectations will get and the more you'll understand them and what you really want in a spouse on the whole.
Also try www.naseeb.com
HOLY SHIYAAAAAA-a-a-a-a----a-a-a-a--------aaaa-aaaT!
CHAAAAAAAAAAAAALO! YE dinn bhee dekhna naseeb main tha..
all-hot-no-quit-shinzoo-dear, it was kinda shocking.. khair, hmmmmm, here are the tips..
. Most of the friends or activity-partners (jeezus, too much naseeb:D) that i met across were because of going to 14august functions, parties between relatives, work-friends that were from desi-origins, having work-friends that had friends from desi-origins, going to sport matches, SUCH as street-cricket, meeting girls there (its kinda surprizing that on a good sunny warm weekend, how many girls and guys show up, JUST for watching it).
so yeah, if i met many this way, sure u can too.. gotta develop a network of people..
. Dunno if u have a cellular or not, having a phone that is mobile and is YOURS only, eventhough HOW open and independent your landline is, still is very beneficial… friends can pass your number atleast without hesitating to this certain someone special that they might think is a good choice for u.
. Masha-allah you are very good looking, and being a guy, just bare with me on this, that wear lipgloss and some eye makeup whenever u go to some desi gathering.. (make it a habit, dont think big’bout it).. its basis and fundamental concept that when guys (being one right here) meet a girl, they always get attracted by a shine on lips and eyes.. (takes guts to admit it)
khair, let me know how it works.. :k: i hope this helped 
what about girls who don’t look good in lip goss or neutral colours? 
there is no hope for me. 
^^ not all men like lipgloss or eye makeup trust me
Re: Re: Re: Meeting people
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by saby: *
Though its true that they give up after being on a lookout for a while and marry with their mothers choice most of the time.
[/QUOTE]
For some reason this idea is looking more and more appealing.:o
yaar, i know its a tough situation, but be careful and dont give anyone wrong signals. Make sure the other person knows what ur looking for,, "commitment". a lot of em might think ur just after some casual fling... plus... dont act as if ur too easy. oh well,,, goodluck,, dont u love this culture?!
did u used in gathering of desis? hmmmm.. and did a guy came up to u to tell u this?
cuz unless that happend, i cant make any comment on that..
ps, its to catch the eye…
Regarding the last few posts:
I think a lot of guys don’t like the idea of make-up, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t attracted to some of the resulting aesthetic 
lol ... so true Sahar. :D
Thank you everyone for your replies, really appreciate it :)
Let me clear up something first, I live in a country where there isn't a big muslim/desi community (compared to US and UK). We don't have a PSA or MSA in my uni (I was actually thinking of setting one up myself). In other words it's hard to socialise withing the community.
waqas72,
I've always had more male friends than female ones. A lot of them muslim aswell. SO I really don't think I'm not 'open' enough or not willing to meet guys or whatever. I think kaka raised a good point. How can I make sure that I'm contacting someone who is willing to commit? I need to have that confirmed before I take the 'next' step. I have the feeling that most of them are just looking for a fling.
PS- am already registered on naseeb.
ANyhow, like I said things are a bit more complicated for me as I know that I don't want to stay here (in Holland). So basically I have to look across the borders which definitely doesn't make things easier :-/
Faizy, thank you :-)
I have a solid network of friends, but that's just what they are.... friends.
I know I should change my attitude a bit aswell as I've only decided recently that I'm 'ready'. SO before this decision it was always "I'm not ready to commit" as an excuse.
shinzy, great idea, why dont u start MSA in your university. will be great for networking:k:
p.s it doesnt have to be MSA, join other groups/organizations. good luck:-)
How do you differentiate between a fling and ‘next step’? If ppl are already commited then what does ‘next’ step mean? You can’t avoid going through some good and bad experiences if u r taking things in ur own hands.
p.s. Faizy leave the boat already 
…lipgloss bhai aap nay mujra kurana hai? 