Marrying

Lifestyle Relationships
41

Re: Marrying

Like many people, OP doesn't know what she wants.

42

Re: Marrying

Believe me liking someone won't help much if you don't respect them. Getting married isn't solution of problems.

43

Re: Marrying

Er hat's not necessarily a good sign..*

Some* guys who behave like this can be jealous and overly possessive..

44

Re: Marrying


and, with violent tendencies, his anger/violence can easily turn against his wife due to pressures of married life.

45

Re: Marrying

^But the girls usually get told 'he'll change after marriage', 'you can tame him' blah blah blah

Only have to look around at others to see the reality..

46

Re: Marrying


true! ... my siggy once read:

"the one who learns from his own mistakes is an intelligent man but the one who learns from others mistakes is indeed a wise man!"

the quote makes more sense when read in Urdu.

47

Re: Marrying

Think deeply for a second are you kinda liking the guy now because you're feeling emotionally down, depressed from the breakup from the Bangladeshi guy? You're in recovery mode right now. Make sure you aren't kinda liking this guy now based on desperation from feeling pressure from your own self to get married because "just being married and hooked is better than being single" in your mind.

48

Re: Marrying

its not unusual to not like MIL but does your fiance stand up for you when his mom is being rude? are you going to live with his mom? I broke off my previous engagement because of this issue, the MIL was horrible and fiance didn't have the guts to defend me. even though we both really liked each other, but I had enough self respect to get out of a relationship where his mom could insult me whenever she wanted. im so glad i broke it off because we would have been fighting every single day if i would have married him. his mom didn't live with him, but she lived nearby and I would have been in hell if I married him. I don't know what your situation is but if she's going to live far away, it wont be so bad hopefully. Also depends on how your fiance handles it. you can expect anything from MIL, but your husband should be the one to defend you. if he is not doing that, hes not worth marrying.
its true that no rishta will be perfect. not liking MIL is not a good enough reason to break off engagement. But if you have to live with his mother, I would seriously think twice before marrying this guy.

49

Re: Marrying

A lot of women who are getting married think that the parents of the guy don't matter or they can adjust, but if they don't like you, or treat you in a very lousy way - then re-think before going through with the marriage. I know every relationship takes time to develop BUT you need both sides to be willing to at least try to be civil.

I've seen this happen to my bhabhi with my MIL and it's not a pretty picture at all. They had problems with each other even during the engagement... and everyone kept telling her to suck it up and things would get better but it never did... So just be a bit cautious. At least a MIL who is able to tolerate you and tries to maintain the relationship is what you want. You're a smart woman so I'm sure you will know what you can fix in terms of your relationship with her and what you can't. Every guy loves his mom and a rift between his wife and mom will also put a strain on the marriage eventually. I've just seen this happening so just advising you to pick a family where you have a fighting chance to have a great or at least a good relationship with his mom. I know it's never going to be like ma-bheti ka pyar unless you're lucky but still I would recommend not marrying someone who's parents despise you or put you down.

50

Re: Marrying

dont get married if you dont like him or respect him or even if you are unhappy and not comfortable.

girls in pakistan do not compromise over these things

i do not think so