Marrying

into a shady family you have no respect for and don’t like. And the guy is good looking and he likes you but you don’t really have any respect for him either. You’re not really happy about the rishtha but you have to go on with your life. How can I get rid of this depression i feel .

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same guy in the last few threads or yet another bad match that you're feeling forced into accepting?

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one of the same. no one is forcing me except my own life circumstances .

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how can you marry someone with so many negatives and expect to be happy in life? if happiness in marriage is desired, stay away from such a guy!

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Marriage is built on respect. It's the foundation for a successful marriage. If you don't respect the gentleman, the best course of action would be not to marry him as a marriage in which there is no respect does not have a good foundation.

That said, we don't know what your reasons are for accepting the gentleman and what it is about him that has caused you not to respect him. I think it would be wise to think this through quite thorough and objectively before making any rash decisions.

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Yes but it is better to be married than not at all.

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why and what makes you think this way? iA, you will find someone better and you don't have to get married to have a miserable married life. no one deserves that.

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Even if it is an unhappy marriage that ends in divorce? You may find it difficult to be unmarried (and that's your prerogative, so no comments on that) but, from what I've read on here, remarrying after a failed marriage is even more difficult in Pakistani circles, so you may want to think this through.

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I see so many girls in pakistan compromise all the time and they do it so happily. So why am I finding it so hard

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It is wishful thinking that I will find someone better but it is nice of you to say that.

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No there will not be divorce here. It is in the family close relation. No one else will marry him and if they do they won't stay so he will never divorce me.

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I really hope that's true but it's also wise to remember that we don't know for certain what will happen in the future. Only Allah knows without doubt what is in store for us. Good luck though.

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no, it's not...maayoosii koii achchhii baat to nahiiN...insaan ko hamesha pur-ummeed aur Allah kii zaat se bahtarii kii ummeed rakhnii chaahiye. Allah aapko sadaa Khush rakkhe...aameen

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If you are in two minds, why don't you do istikhara?

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istiKhaara is NOT a 'litmus' test. one must do his/her home work first then make informed/intelligent decision after which you do the istiKhaara asking for Allah's blessings in what you decide.

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well.. istikhara is also for guidance in making a decision ( reference ) …while i agree the due-diligence has to be done before you perform istikhara.. the OP seem to have already done that and is still confused about it…

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A substantial number of married people would disagree.

well, everyone want to look happy on the outside. God knows if they really are

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I’m not confused I’m just depressed. I don’t know maybe I’m not being thankful.

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Oh..in that case.. you have come to the right place..we have so many sob stories here.. after reading them, am sure you will start feeling better in no time

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I know this one lady there and she says she didn't get any happiness with her marriage but shes always smiling and cracking jokes.