In the past 3 days i have come to know of at least 4 situations (US or Pak) in which a woman passed away and her husband married her sister, i.e. previously known as his sali…
I’m not sure what the religious stance is, but it seems to be perfectly acceptable in our culture…
Is it the same for a woman? if her husband passes away, she is free to marry her ex-jaith/devars?
Personally I can’t imagine how the dynamics of such a relationship…or how it would be to suddenly have feelings for someone from your in laws…
Islam does not allow marrying two sisters at the same time. If one dies or get divorced then it is allowed. Marrying two sisters at the same time is specifically prohibited in Quran.
“Forbidden to you (for marriage) are: … two sisters in wedlock at the same time, except for what has already passed” [al-Nisaa’ 4:23]
I know of two situations where the husband married his deceased wife's sister - it was actually at the behest of his susraal wallay (the kids' nani/nana) and one situation where the wife married her deceased husband's younger brother - again it was arranged by the dadiyaal wallay.
The logic in each of the circumstances was that who better to raise the children than the sag'gah chacha or khaala - no question of sautayla maa or baap. And m'A, all these years later (the "kids" are now grandparents), they lived a happy (not perfect - there were some tensions) life.
As for the change in relationship - it takes time - but if the couple is open to the new definition of the relationship - then why not?
Yes. Friend of mine in school lost her mother at the age of 15. She had some young siblings ( 5 -7yrs old or so) and the khala (her deceased mom's sister) was helping them out. After a couple of years, her father ended up marrying the khala, as she had become somewhat of a mother figure to the kids and they developed feelings for one another as well.
i know of a case in pakistan whereby after the death of her husband, the lady married his younger brother a year on. I thought it odd, it was arranged by the lady's parents and i got the impression neither the bride or groom had much say in it.
We know a family. Guy died, leaving 2 kids and a wife behind. Parents of that guy forced the youngest bachelor son to marry his bhabhi. They are Alhamdulillah a very happy couple from last 10-12 years or so now.
I think its unfair to a person to be forced into making that kind of a sacrifice, for family's sake...... be it a man or a woman.
It doesn't matter whether they're happy later on or not, whether it worked out for the best or whatever...... its just not fair and must be really really hard for the new spouse trying to fit the shoes of the ex-spouse.
Oh yah i have heard a few situations like this . my friend's cousin's Husband died .. and then like 2 yearz l8er she was married to her husband's older brother.
If you're married to ur cousin then cousin dies then you marry his brother isn't that a bit toooo 'keeping it in the family?'
I'd find it a bit strange sleeping with my husband then a few years down the line sharing a bed with his brother.. and we're not even related.. There are millions of ppl out there, seems a bit odd that a spouse should go from one brother to another or one sister to the next like that.. And don't all the resulting kids get mixed up - siblings/cousins/both? If two first cousins become siblings after their parents marry does that mean they're allowed to marry as well??
The whole idea just seems messy to me, continuously marrying only first cousins over several generations is bad enough but this just takes it to a whole new level.. Are people really that scared of mixing with 'outsiders?'
well i know in my youngest chachi's family there was girl (very beautiful) whose husband died, and she remarried his older brother and became his second wife, she didn't even have kids at the time and when she came to my chachi's sisters wedding his first wife was unaware that her dewrani was married to her husband but we never found out what happened after they went home...
my dads khalas daughter was in a similar situation, she was married into my dads side of the family to his thaya/chachus son, then when they offered the rishta of teh nands son to keep the 2 kids in the family her family is conservative and was quiet offended, so not everyone is ok with it. =
my best friend in pak, her mother got married go her father when his first wife passed away( who was his second wife's older sister)
I think most of the time it is out of concern for kids but some of these situations are quite messed up and are done out of greed or lust, here is one of my parents friends' situation.
One of our neighbours (our very good friends too) a woman's husband died, she was young, was very very beautiful, rich and had a daughter, she was married to another man who already was married and had kids.
So it was a big family with kids from both parents first marriages and then kids from their second marriage. When all kids grew up, the girl from woman's first marraige(who was also very pretty) was married to the man's son from first marriage. This couple used (the girl from woman and guy from the first marriage) to live next to our house, she used to say it took her years to accept him as a husband because she has always thought of him to be the older brother, they were not the best of the couples but aunty was a very nice woman she was always smiling and helpful. She told my mom that she got huge inheretance from his father side( textile mills, oil mills, cotton factories, agriculture land, houses) so the man who married his mother wanted his family to have it all and the only way that was poosible was by doing this. Now that aunty is grandmother herself past is behind everybody but the family went through a lot of psycological issues..
a guy died.....and the family of the guy wanted his nephew ( the son of the dead guy's brother) to marry his widowed chachi.......the boy (nephew) refused.....and he got beat up by his own uncles.....the chachi had agreed but the boy refused even after getting beaten up..
and you must be thinking, is it even halal to marry to chachi??
the answer is yes.......your chachi is not related to you via bloodline (as the khala,phuphi).....hence it is allowed..