Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

Lifestyle Relationships
1

Would you?

As Muslims, we are taught to look first for deen in our spouses… sadly in our culture, many young adults who are deaf or mute or have some other handicap are left unmarried… (some do marry, but i’m talking about the mindset regarding rishtas)

your opinions?

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

Survival of the fittest :)

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

lakin there are some great people out there who would make excellent spouses…but we write them off… and what if your future spouse is lousy @ everything…yeah they were “fit according to Darwin” but what if you can’t fix stupid?

:aq:

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

I would leave that to them better muslims.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

I have a friend whose sister married such a person and mashaAllah they are very happy and also have a cute daughter.
Another friend of mine told me that this thing kind of runs in her family (meaning some are naturally deaf and dumb) but all have families and are happy.

6

What a straight forward janwar.

Aesay janwaron ki iss dunia mai bohot sakht zaruurat hay. :hehe:

As for me; I cant see past such person. I wouldnt marry her, but support her if she deeply desires.

7

Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

Damn, a good looking mute girl would be like a dream come true for me. Do you know any? If yes, tell me her adress, i'll ask her parents for rishta.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

^^ Thats the spirit MashaAllah .. wish we had many more of you ..

and I also support your view on this .. apart from the joke ..that mute etc should not be left out .. not just the gurls but boys ... and a person is rewarded more in this world and in the hearafter who looks after and supports his/her spouse .. when society has shunned them out of the way..its sad and it shudnt be done ..After they too are human and they too deserve what everyone has.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

dont think so.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

and you dunt even have a view to why not ???

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

its all abt our stupid socity!

ppl always want a well educated good looking without any illnes a perfect daughter or son in law!

more then this i dont have any words 2 say!

i would get marreid a deaf/ mute couple together atleats they dont stay unmarried

so they can understand the eachother very well!

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

because i dont want to.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

A deaf man and blind woman. Great combination.

Seriously speaking.

There are services and agencies which do help these unfortunate people.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

^ I have seen that happen quite alot in Pakistan.

A little off topic, but I know this guy from Pakistan who is doing his PhD in quantum physics at Harvard. Whats so special about him? He's totally blind!!! He was also interviewed in Geo a little while ago. It's amazing, he lives on his own too (fam in Pak)! He came to visit us and I took him to watch Leo's 'The Aviator' and boy he pretty much heard the movie and seemed like he grasped more out of it than everyone else! I guess God didnt give him an eyesight, but gave him a lot more to compensate.

I guess a disability can only be your disability if you make it one. I think whoever marries my friend would be one lucky girl.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

There's some very negative and ancient thinking in desi's. There is absolutely nothing wrong with someone who can't hear or speak, they are human beings just like the rest of us. If someone thinks that such a person is not worthy of marriage then more fool them - they aren't even worth considering for marriage, who'd want to marry someone so pathetic?

But then when we look at the list that people ask for in a rishta then why are we so surprised that people are so narrow minded.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

^ Totally agree...if they have deen and are righteous; who cares if they can't see/speak/hear.

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

Dead/Mute?! Our "broadminded" society don't want to marry dark skinned girls never mind deaf or mute. I have yet to come across someone who said " kali larki beshak ho". It's usually " Tall, fair, slim, long hair". When you look at the son he's " short, bald, kala, fat". Charming!

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

In an ideal world...there wouldn't be any handicaps...and ideally "if they have deen and are righteous, it shouldn't matter if they can't see/speak/hear."

But the truth is that people do care and it does matter. Cuz it's not only about deen...we still live in the duniya. And whether or not one marries a person with a disability.....can depend upon several factors. For example: 1) the severity of that handicap/disability.....2) if the individual feels they have the emotional and physical energy to cope with that disability and make the marriage work........3) also some disabilities may be passed on to children (could be another factor to consider), etc. If you love the person....that can influence your decision. I know of examples were one partner gets into an accident and becomes permanently handicapped...and the other partner becomes even more devoted.

More power to those that can manage it....I think it's very difficult but admirable. IMO it's too simplistic to say that if the person has "deen" that it should be enough. And for some people it is enough. But this is the real world and many factors are considered when it comes to marriage.

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now now, we cant marry a dead girl can we? :P

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Re: Marrying someone deaf/mute etc

It’s the heart that counts if she was kind hearted and pretty what more could i want.

Sure i would have no problem marrying a mute or deaf girl so long as she was sweet and kind hearted.

But damnit i’m married already… oh well like the Toyota Hilux advert… theres always room for more :champ: