Marrying an ABCD broad

FACTS:

  • Western men are on a marriage strike. The median age for first marriage for men is pushing 28- the highest ever.
    -Marriage rates have dropped 40% in the last four decades
    -50% marriages end up in divorce
    -Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women
    -Odds are 40-1 that wife will get physical custody
    -40 percent of mothers admitted to having interfered with father’s visitation rights out of spite.
    -sometimes a man gets to keep only 13% of his take home pay (huge financial windfall).
    -“14 % dad” is a father who is allowed to spend only one day out of the week with his children
    -Increasing number of men have cited the anti-male bias in the current marriage law for this current phenomenon
    -No-fault divorce laws have created economic incentive for mothers to initiate unilateral divorces when no grounds for divorce exist.
    -Divorced men commit suicide 400% more than women

So when these men start voting with their feet against marriage and push the median age beyond 28, past the normal child bearing ages of women, the institution of marriage will cease to exist.

In a way it’s a welcoming relief that desis are not yet part of these gruesome statistics. Yet, the risks far outweigh the benefits of marrying an ABCD. I think women generally tend to cause more problems in marriage because of improper expectations. When reality hits, and the marriage isn’t 100% roses and romance 100% of the time, the man has no problem with it, realizing that he lives in the real world, and not a fairy tale.

I am having second thoughts about marrying here in the US.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

:rolleyes: not again.. :frowning:

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Thanks for those statistics, dopa.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

May you emerge scathless without serious damage to your character at the end of the day when all are done commenting on this piece of information.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

:rotfl:

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Yup, memorize them.! So when the drought hits, you wont be caught off-guard.
Ahem, i go by the name Dopey around here. Just a reminder.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Have you been scalded and scorched before?

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

dopey, does that mean u r never marrying? chalo koi baat nahien. larkiyaN shukranay kay nifil parh rahi hongi :D

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

I agree with dope. ABCDs have expectations which are very hard to fulfill. and they have no patience at all meaning even the smallest of things can be made a BIG deal about.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

suroor: seriously considering heading home to get this marriage thing off the check list. What a chafe. Why do women expect so much from marriage?

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

How come similar expressions are not elicited in the male-bashing threads?:slight_smile:

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Okay, do these statistics apply to desis or nondesis? You have to realize, that even if we're born and riased here, most desis still tend to be a tad more traditional (not totally, but even just a bit more) than the average gora (or kala, spaina, whatever), so it isn't fair to say that marrying a girl from here is "risky."

FACTS:

  • Western men are on a marriage strike. The median age for first marriage for men is pushing 28- the highest ever.

** There could be a lot of reasons for this... one being a lot of ppl want to concentrate on their careers... i dont' think the majority of men that age can afford to take time off from their jobs. it's getting harder and harder to survive on only one income alone, if one wants to maintain a certain level of material comfort. Another reason is that, no one marries for sex anymore... it's easily available, no one waits til their wedding night to have sex. **

-Marriage rates have dropped 40% in the last four decades
-50% marriages end up in divorce
*-Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women
*
-Odds are 40-1 that wife will get physical custody
-40 percent of mothers admitted to having interfered with father's visitation rights out of spite.
-sometimes a man gets to keep only 13% of his take home pay (huge financial windfall).
-"14 % dad" is a father who is allowed to spend only one day out of the week with his children
-Increasing number of men have cited the anti-male bias in the current marriage law for this current phenomenon
-No-fault divorce laws have created economic incentive for mothers to initiate unilateral divorces when no grounds for divorce exist.
**-Divorced men commit suicide 400% more than women

***Now I don't see this as necessarily a bad thing. Women today are more educated, financially independent, so they are not dependent on thier men to live, which is a good thing. However, except for severe physical, mental, emotional, sexual abuse, divorce should not be the first step... *

So when these men start voting with their feet against marriage and push the median age beyond 28, past the normal child bearing ages of women, the institution of marriage will cease to exist.

In a way it's a welcoming relief that desis are not yet part of these gruesome statistics. Yet, the risks far outweigh the benefits of marrying an ABCD. I think women generally tend to cause more problems in marriage because of improper expectations. When reality hits, and the marriage isn't 100% roses and romance 100% of the time, the man has no problem with it, realizing that he lives in the real world, and not a fairy tale.

** Going by those facts above, it's not just us "ABCD broads" who have these unrealistic expectations, it's American women in general. From the time we're lil girls, we're constantly bombarded with magazines, barbies, images of the perfect wedding, the fantasy dress, fantasy man etc. Blame hollywood/Bollywood and romance novels for their millions of "happy ending" movies and books. **

I am having second thoughts about marrying here in the US.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

well men have expectations too, so why can’t women have expectations? and btw, girls back home have lot of expectations too now adays :stuck_out_tongue: kisi khush fehmi mein rehnay ki zaroorat nahien.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Dopa, there’s another dopey here already, so u r dopa or dope :stuck_out_tongue: Why similar expressions used in male bashing threads? I dunno…quite frankly i’m getting sick and tired of ppl hating on us, paki girls, ABCD girls, etcetc… we’re not all partying, club going trash, just becoz u happen to have met some like that, and evnehad fun with them, not all of us are that way… there r some really great girls who r marriage material. In fact with all the shiit i’ve heard about paki guys on this site, those publicly admitting they want to cheat on their wives, who r willing to flirt with random girls while married, but i still have hope that there’s decent paki guys somewhere out there for me and I wont immediately reject someone just becoz of where they live. ::::tiredwalasmiley::::

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Know for a fact that the no-fault divorce laws and marriage laws are the primary culprits.

**

So I mentioned the effects (unrealistic expectations) and you stated the cause (your above comment). But do you agree that these unrealistic expectations will cause more no-fault divorces and since the laws are in your favor, soon more and more desi men will say no to marriage?

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

Dope, just because you can, desn't mean you should. It would have totake more than some "anti-male" laws to get me to divorce the guy. It's also about your upbringing and the values you've been taught and have instilled in you from society and your family. And if desi men start to say no to marriage, well then, ther'es a lot more to pick from. Desis are not the only species that exist you know :p . They should just stop complaining when they see desi girls with non-desi guys, and if they say no to marriage, tehn don't marry, period. Don't jsut refuse American born-raised girls and think you'll have an easy time when you go to Pakistan.

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

If you venture out in the non-desi world, then you WILL be the statistic. At least with desi men the liklihood of divorce is less than 50%. We are still lagging behind the numbers but if ABCD girls continue to emulate the western women, then we will come around. But the advantages we have is an untapped supply of women in pakistan. So, who suffers?

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

I speak for myself: i've had a strict Pakistani, Islamic upbringing, and I don't find the life of a western woman very appealing. To emulate one, I will have to disregard my religion, my culture, and everything my parents ever did for me. I'm sure i'm not the only one who feels this way. Unfortunately, we're the ones who suffer because guys are going to overlook us because they let some statistics scare em:D

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

And if we venture out in to the non desi world, it's because of you (generally speaking). It's a vicious cycle: desi men think desi women here are tryign to be like American women, according to statistics and laws so they won't marry them. So those desi women turn to nondesi men and become part of those statistics that put you off to marrying them, thus proving those very statistics that made you stay away from them. Does that make sense?

Re: Marrying an ABCD broad

^how about you guys come down to earth and realize that marriage is not a bed of roses, starting with discarding such unrealistic fantasy wedding ideas. No, the rocks are no indication of how much we love you. They only indicate how shallow and superficial women can get, almost on par with the superficiality men get labeled with for being obsessed with beauty.