Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Hey don't tell me that, I already know it :D Why don't you guys wake up and realize we're not all that superifical and shallow either? Men are not innocent either. Trophy wives anyone? :D
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
I think Sara & Dopa should get married as she is in convincing-him-mode...
PS: I myself will try to marry a local virgin Gwadar Girl...mmmmmmm... :)
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Yeah you should definitely get married back home. Jab reality say saamna hoga na tabhi hosh thikaane aayenge. You will forget all this racial bias then.
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
One of my work colleagues has a friend who committed sucide after his divorce...he lost everything...his wife...his children...assets...and even future earnings...everything he had worked hard for he was losing...marriage is a big risk...and divorce is big money...
And its not exactly polite to start talking to your fiance about pre-nups...
So just out of curiousity then...if you and your wife were to only have a nikah...in Islam what rights does she have after divorce in regards to children...property...other assets and earnings?...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
well if u marry a good muslimah...you wont be another statistic. doesnt matter where she is from as long as she is strong in her faith.
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Why are u guys so afraid? If you people are good people, and you will be good to your wife and your kids, then I don't see why the need to be crapping in your pants this early on in the game.
Unless if there is something to feel guilty about already...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Easier said than done Angel Eyes...Even good Muslimahs have problems and expectations...and even good Muslimahs divorce their husbands...Bad Muslims can have strong marriages...
Divorce doesnt make people bad...those who are stong in their faith are no an exception to divorce...Allah says its makruh...he doesnt make it haram because he understands its a reality...it should be a last resort but hey it can happen...
No-one steps into marriage expecting divorce but its just something thatis inevitably happening...and the only reason that desis tend to have a smaller rate is not cos their marriages are any better...its just they settle for unhappiness for things like children and family...lower divorce rates amongst pakis is not an indicator for happiness...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
^ Its nice to see that you're talking about what Allah says and making references to the Quran and what not these days. Have u given up your hindu time-pass girlfriend?
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
naughty's acutally right, divorce doesn't make one a bad muslim, and desis realize there's more in marriage than just the two people getting married... but i think what angel eyes meant was that even though good Muslims divorce, but they wouldn't divorce for petty reasons, nor would a divorced good Muslim woman keep her children away from her husband out of spite, as those statistics state. A good muslim would not let their significant other (even if he/she's former) commit suicide or get depressed...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
PCG...Divorce isnt always a result of someone being bad...a lot of the time it can just be about incompatibility and just seeing things differently and having inreconcilable differences...this doesnt make anyone bad...its just these people should never have married each other...
The only thing i take from these stats is i want to know that whoever im gonna settle with should be someone who i genuinely love...someone who is 1st best in my eyes...not a compromise...someone who is ideolically simliar to me and someone who communicates and works through problems with me...you want to be absolutely sure that yo are settling down with the 'one'...and try your best not to make sure you are a statistic...
Even then you dont know what the future holds...the girl you thought was perfect could end up being a nightmare within marriage...you just have to do what is in your control and hope for the best...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Sara…you make some good points…:k: …
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Naughty, this was a line from "Wedding Crashers"..... you don't know what the future brings, but you can do the best with what information you have as of the moment. :)
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Did I say divorce is the result of someone being bad?
Read what I said again, my little mr. I-know-everything-about-relationships
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
PCG...why do you take everything as a personal attack...i did read your point...
You asked why men are afraid to take the plunge into marriage...and then you said that if you are good to your partners then you dont need to worry...
My point is simply about the fact that regardless of whether you are both good partners...you might not be compatible...simple...you can be the best parents in the world but that wont ensure a succesful marriage...if you are two good people its not a guarantee that you will have a good marriage...so even if i am a good partner and father i can still have a right to worry about making that plunge...thats what i meant when i was referring to your point...have i missed something?...
And Sara...nice line...completely agree...i still need to see that movie...my friend says its the funniest film hes seen...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
A successful marriage requires work. You could be compatible or even incompatible - what the hell determines that anyway?
The number of movies you two both like? That the two of you like going to the same resteraunt or like the same type of music? That you two believe that the wifey can work or should only stay at home? That sexual positions only mean this way or that way, and everything else is no-go, or that anything goes?
Gimme a break kiddo - no two people are the same. It depends on how mature you are, that when life throws curveballs at you, how well are you able to cope, and how well is your partner able to cope, and most of all, how well the two of you can GET each other to cope.
I told my sister this once recently. Marriage is like having a roommate. You gotta smell their crap, they have to smell your crap, and in the end, it brings you closer together.
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Yeh i agree with you...i dont dispute that...i never said it was essential to be the same...that would just be boring...a marriage is hard work obviously...all im saying theres no clear recipe for success...failure of a marriage happens with people whom you last expect to fail and sometimes marriage works with people you least expect...like i said...do whats in your control and hope for the best...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
^ Good. There should be no reason why these statistics should scare you as long as you are mature about it. Sure there is liklihood of failure, but if you work really really hard to keep the marriage alive, there is much chance of success.
So stop crapping in your pants, and enjoy your life, and please grow up a little before you settle down. You need to get to know your own women from your own culture/religion a bit more, I think.
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Trust me when i say to you im not crapping my pants...like iv said i do whats in my control and leave the rest to god...life is there for living...things go well and things dont...just make sure you live life...experience it and learn from it...
As for me growing up...theres no end to personal growth...you grow from each experience that you have...marriage is something with which you grow...no-one is perfectly prepared for marriage...
And in terms of gals of my religion or culture...im at uni theres no shortage of Muslim gals that iv met...its not a bad idea because it does have a simple end result if things work out and it reduces a lot of complications...but hey you dont control who you like...
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
Then expand yourself beyond your university.
Re: Marrying an ABCD broad
man i just heard .. a WOMAN IS ALLOWED TO DIVORCE HER HUBBY IF SHE FINDS HIM NOT SO HANDSOME/UGLY even later in life .. yes its a good enough reason and it actualy happend in PROPHET's age n PROPHET MUHAMMAD (pbuh) did allow it himself
p/s: Allah mera kya bane ga :(