clad, if you have balls then make a stand - if you can't do it then leave her alone.. because the way you are handling, it's not helping her, make sense?
*^ THAT!! *
*Also, don't start something you can't finish! If you wanna fight for her do it all the way and marry her with respect, don't just leave her hanging! *
Re: marrying a divorced girl
That's messed up.
That's messed up.
^ditto.
Clad- since the girl's in-laws don't know about you... you could pretend to be the kids' music teacher so that you can frequent their home.
^ditto.
Clad- since the girl's in-laws don't know about you... you could pretend to be the kids' music teacher so that you can frequent their home.
Courtesy of Mohabbatein. LOL
Re: marrying a divorced girl
what's the reality of this situation, do divorced girls get married again or are they supposedly looking at a life of nothing but being around family and friends?
what's their life like? my aunt's husband who's a doctor had an affair with a fellow woman doctor and ended up giving my aunt a divorce. i'm not very close to her but i hope she will have a good life even if she's going to face a life without ever having a caring, respectful, loving husband by her side for the rest of her life............
any one of us could be in such a situation so i pray that allah watches over such women and protects them from further pain
Re: marrying a divorced girl
Globalgal, there is no reason why divorced or widowed women can't remarry if they so wish, they just have a few more obstacles to overcome than other women. Your aunt can make a good life for herself, it is in her hands how she tackles things.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
If they are Muslims, then forbidding this is very much against Islam. Widow or divorcee, Islam permits both to remarry.
I have a friend who lost his wife, he married a divorced female and they are living happily. Oké, she didn't have any children at all but I'm sure even if she did, her family still would have allowed her to remarry.
I have a few divorced friends, Muslims, some Pakistani and others non-Pakistani, most of them are remarried now. I don't understand why people make a problem of divorced people. They excisted even in the time of Muhamad (saww) and the Sahaba (ra). There are many ahadith which narrate stories of divorced people getting remarried with permission even of Muhammad (saww).
Re: marrying a divorced girl
el topo, notorious
realistically looking at it though would a desi man marry a divorced woman with tiny babies?/
.........i can't imagine such a thing, for desi divorced men it's much simpler but for women not so much
Re: marrying a divorced girl
el topo, notorious
realistically looking at it though would a desi man marry a divorced woman with tiny babies?/
The majority probably wouldn't. Generalizations suck though, so it would depend on the man.
Indeed. Our society is not very kind, or fair. Sadly it is often women themselves who ensure the limitation of other women.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
The title of this thread is stupid. If her husband died then how come she is a divorced girl? She is a widowed woman or she is a widow. Jeez.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
I know it must be hard for you to understand, you feel for her situation and all. But if I was the guy that died I honestly wouldn't want my wife to remarry - I know that comes across as selfish etc.. but I alhumdulillah am a muslim and know there is life after death and inshallah I would want my wife to be mine in jannah (inshallah) hence I wouldn't want her to get married.
I donno how many of you men agree.. I alhumdulillah love my fiance dearly and inshallah want to spend the rest of eternity with her (ameen)
Re: marrying a divorced girl
So, if he meant widowed...that reminds me of the movie, Mohabatein...where one of the girls (who is widowed) lives with her in-laws...who prevent her from getting married because they feel her presence sort of keeps their son "alive".
That's were this story is from!! lol I knew it. But yes I agree Im sure it happens in real life too.
I wouldnt want you to get involved in a case like this.. you dont know anything about her to start helping her! Unless she secretly told you she is living in hell and want to get out.. then yeh then help her. . .
Re: marrying a divorced girl
Widowed/Divorced. Islam does not require her in-laws to give permission for her marriage I think.
But I understand its slightly more complicated than just Islam. Its their retarded culture getting in the way of her entire life. Sheesh, she's just 23. Dude, major respect to you for trying to make sense of this situation even with her being widowed and having kids. Most people probably wouldn't want any part in it. But I guess it makes sense to step away if its not going to work out. If you hang around, she's start getting hope and that'd be very unfair on the poor girl and to yourself.
I hope her in-laws and her family realise they're getting in the way of her being happy. This is totally against religion/nature and what not.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
*^ THAT!! *
*Also, don't start something you can't finish! If you wanna fight for her do it all the way and marry her with respect, don't just leave her hanging! *
^Agreed!!
i believe that you you shoudl fight for her!
you will have to be consistent!
speak to her inlaws!
i am sure its only because mayeb no one put such though in her inlaws mind!
since they dont even know about you!
Good Luck!
and i cant believe people like you exist
Re: marrying a divorced girl
Extremely sad. This is a Hindu concept, it has no basis in Islam. Its the Hindus who don't allow widows to remarry and all that.
Anyways, since this type of thought prevails in Pakistan and you can't do anything about it, I'll advise you to steer clear. Unless yours is a super strong family that can protect both you and the girl. To do anything at all, you need the support of your parents.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
I know it must be hard for you to understand, you feel for her situation and all. But if I was the guy that died I honestly wouldn't want my wife to remarry - I know that comes across as selfish etc.. but I alhumdulillah am a muslim and know there is life after death and inshallah I would want my wife to be mine in jannah (inshallah) hence I wouldn't want her to get married.
I donno how many of you men agree.. I alhumdulillah love my fiance dearly and inshallah want to spend the rest of eternity with her (ameen)
Sir, I stand in awe of your reasoning. In a few sentences, you have negated all teachings of Islam and example of Prophet Mohammad PBUH. And for your information, there is no "yours" or "mine" in Jannat. There, everyone who can get in, will live independent lives in bliss for all eternity. Relatives will know each other, but Earthly concepts and restraints will not apply.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
Sir, I stand in awe of your reasoning. In a few sentences, you have negated all teachings of Islam and example of Prophet Mohammad PBUH. And for your information, there is no "yours" or "mine" in Jannat. There, everyone who can get in, will live independent lives in bliss for all eternity. Relatives will know each other, but Earthly concepts and restraints will not apply.
So you are telling me your wife in this world will not be your wife in the hereafter? given that you both go to heaven in the 1st place? and back up your claim with authentic quotes etc please.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
Sympathy is one of the stupidest reasons for marriage. One would think you have caused her enough nuisance already, move on a bother someone with relatively lesser worries.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
I know it must be hard for you to understand, you feel for her situation and all. But if I was the guy that died I honestly wouldn't want my wife to remarry - I know that comes across as selfish etc.. but I alhumdulillah am a muslim and know there is life after death and inshallah I would want my wife to be mine in jannah (inshallah) hence I wouldn't want her to get married.
I donno how many of you men agree.. I alhumdulillah love my fiance dearly and inshallah want to spend the rest of eternity with her (ameen)
LOL wow man. You need to stop hanging out with whoever it is that you hangout with. She should have the freedom to decide for herself and find support if she wants once you croak, instead of decorating your photos with them garlands and waiting to join her sartaaj under the trees of heaven. Be practical, I mean how old are you.
But anyway, considering how many mashallahs, inshallahs and alhamdulilahs you have used, I doubt someone like me will ever affect your righteous plans. Cheers to that.
Re: marrying a divorced girl
I know it must be hard for you to understand, you feel for her situation and all. But if I was the guy that died I honestly wouldn't want my wife to remarry - I know that comes across as selfish etc.. but I alhumdulillah am a muslim and know there is life after death and inshallah I would want my wife to be mine in jannah (inshallah) hence I wouldn't want her to get married.
I donno how many of you men agree.. I alhumdulillah love my fiance dearly and inshallah want to spend the rest of eternity with her (ameen)
Mate, are you 'special'? Allow your idiocy!