Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Marrying My Cousin
Tue 15 Mar, 11:20 pm - 12:00 am 40mins

Eight years ago British born Neila Butt married a man she hadn’t met before. Farooq was born in Pakistan; he spoke very limited English and was her first cousin. Now it is her brother’s turn.

More than half of British Pakistanis marry their first cousins. Despite many people believing that it is illegal - it isn’t. Many non-Pakistanis are shocked at the thought of cousin marriages, but Neila grew up with the knowledge that her marriage would be arranged, and she stresses that she wasn’t forced into it.

Things have gone well for Neila. She has been very happily and successfully married for seven years, has two children, and her family hold her marriage up as a shining example of how cousin marriages work.

Marrying My Cousin is Neila’s personal story, but the film also follows her 30 year old brother Gark as he embarks on a momentous journey to Pakistan to meet the cousin his family plan for him to marry. He has agreed to go there, but he is quite clear that he has no plans for the wedding to ever take place.

Neila explores why many Pakistanis marry their cousins, despite the health risks, and speaks to experts who explain the health implications of these cousin marriages. The programme gives a first hand account of Gark’s visit and its life changing outcome.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Neely, what are your personal thoughts on Cousin marriages?

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

my personal thoughts have nothing to do with this thread.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

hahahah Ahmadjee was very nicely trying to point out that the most recent sticky asks that we give our own input on a topic when we put it in....

so neely should have put the title as TV SHOW AD:marrying your cousin. Watch it at...

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Ok I see. Sorry.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Poor Garf or whatever his name was.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Gark.

Yeah - he was caught right in it - no way out.

What kind of name is Gark anyway!

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

felt sorry for the guy-emotinal blackmail and pressure forced him to say yes...his sister that older one she acted as if she didnt even pressure him....silly woman she knew he didnt want to go ahead with it but she went ahead with the mehndhi and then she had the cjeek to say at the end "i respect my brother for the choice he made" choice ????? you call that a choice?? couldnt she see the pain in his eyes? its not just bad for him what about the poor girl?

and what about the girl with the skin disorder...that was so sad subhanallah makes you realise just how lucky you are and all makes you feel ashamed of all the times you feel sorry for your self!

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

I saw it.. I wanted to ring Gaak and say - I feel u man!

Exactly what happened to me.. :(
it was like re-living it.
:(

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Exactly, they were totally contradicting themselves, “he can say no if he wants to” and then “aww shes been waiting for him all her life, her lifes been on hold”.
I really felt for him.

However, the success of his sisters marriage and her positive attitude towards it will hopefully dispel alot of negative myths surrounding arranged marriages which many people have.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

what was so annoyingly typical paki thing..

groom's saying no no no not sure..
family are doing the maniyah.. its like whattttttttttt? he hasnt said Yes yet?

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

i dont we should judge the family too quickly, clever editing on bbc 2's part?

i feel for the family more than i do him, they were lying to themselves, thats worse than emotional blackmail.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Oh well, better a cousin marriage as opposed to the Oedipus Syndrome I guess !!!

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

I had a Bangladeshi friend who would make out with his 1st cousin when he got horny. I ended up accusing him of secretly being a Pakistani in denial.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Are pakis the only muslims who marry their cousins? I know it's allowed in Islam and all, but do other cultures, Arabs, blacks, Bosnians/Albanians practice it as well?

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Indian Muslims do it too.

And I have an Iranian Kurdish friend who's sister married her cousin ... though that was a love marriage.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

A number of Americans and white europeans (including the British) do this too.

Theres loads of websites dedicated to the topic.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Indian hindus do it too. It is a left over legacy.

Saudi is a big cousin schtupping place.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Yes I heard and shocked the hell out of me. One of my good friends is South Indian. Gosh, can’t think of the place where she exactly is from but she told me it happens.

Re: Marrying a cousin - 11.20pm BBC2 tonight

Yeah I think in a thousand years when Pakistan joins Swtizerland and India joins australiua, such cultural legacies of islam can be eradicated..afsos hai.. until then..same people..same siht.