Marrying a caucasian...

[Paheli00]

Re: Marrying a caucasian…

@Heathcliff

expectations and desire have very different effects, though it is possible for another to adjust within a different culture, some things they will not just understand aka why some idiot in your family will be indifferently rude to them for no apparent reason.** the issue is not that your family is willing to accept it or if your willing to do it, but will others in your community be able to accept it. Or are you willing to let go of those people and most cases that is really hard because you still love those people.** It is particularly hard for these interracial and ethnic marriages due to the fact that majority of desi community is on crack, if not your family, then some one else will surely have something to say. the real question is are you willing to put your partner through that? **You have to weigh your expectations with your desire… and whatever more important is all that matters in the end… right?
**yah i think so

Agree with this. Family/“community” will “talk”. BOTH people in the relationship need to understand and accept that fact that they’re “different”. They both need to decide whether or not they’re willing to put each other #1…above everyone else in their life. It’s about deciding what matters to YOU and what you’re willing to give up/deal with in order to be with that person.

I have a khala whose husband is white. They’re been married almost 30 years.
I have another cousin who got engaged to a white guy a few months ago…wedding next summer.
One of my closest guy friends is married to a Chinese girl.
My fiance has 2 desi guy friends who’re with white girls (one is married, the 2nd couple engaged).

Other than the above…both fiance and I know quite a few other couples who’re in “mixed marriages”…either religiously or culturally. Heck my relationship is technically “mixed” too…we’re both desi but the culture is totally different.

At the end…I think the “concept” of what can go wrong is not much different in a mixed marriage versus a marriage where everything is “picture perfect”. At the end of the day…if both people are not willing to put each other as their #1 priority…then the marriage has a major chance of failing.