a little background:
So this weekend, I went out, and was supposed to come home by a certain time, things ran late and ended later than was supposed to. By that time, I was getting antsy and desperately wanted to get home. I’d called my husband and he just said that it was late and he did sound very annoyed/upset.
For some reason, some (not all) people I meet expect me to be free and not have any curfew just because I’m married. and, technically, I don’t have a curfew. but I know what my husband expects of me and wants from me in this regard…so is that weird then? I admit I start feeling things that are not very rational, but I attribute that to that’s just how I was raised..and as much as I try to cool down and think logically…eh it doesnt work
Now im not complaining about my husband (shocker of all shockers!!!) but the fact that there are those who can’t respect that I have to leave at a certain time. I have known people whose husbands/parents weren’t very strict so they had lots of time to hang out and do whatever…and to some extent I do as well.. and I may not be working and I may not have kids and I admit that my husband may not be “the typical desi husband” (not my words…that’s how he’s been described by my friends) but that doesn’t mean I have unlimited time to hang out.
so yeah, question to the married women..do you have “curfews”? does anyone really have totally and unlimited freedom?
Freedom, for all philosophical reasons, is the monstrous ideology that have caused more violence, disagreement, dissatisfaction and disengagement in the lives of people as individuals and collectively as a nation than any other ideological concept. Live within the limits of religious, social, marital and constitutional boundaries unless the intent is greater than the life.
may be, more than 'curfew', its actually 'care' and husband gets 'worried' about wife in dogs-eat-dogs world?
I m fed up of 'some' people who always poke their nose in an others healthy relationship.
"O tumheen time per ghar jana hota hai? hamarey husband nai tu aisee koi pabandi nahi lagiee hai hum per" - Pabandi my !@#$@#$@#$
If I have told my wife that I'll be home by 10pm, even she calls me up at 10:30 and ask where I m, if everything is ok and why have i not reached home - and I like it.
Does that mean your huuby can not go out alone?, if so what else curfew is.
Does it matter who is imposing?
Good question! lol
We never really go out without each other. I would be upset if he went out without me but I don't think he will be upset if I went out without him but he would want to know where I am..
Yes hubs likes me home by the time he is home. Other than that, i dont usually go out alone at night without him. He doesnt think its safe and i appreciate it. that is not to say i cannot hang out with friends at night but its very rare and i am usually home by 10ish. Mainly because my daughter cannot stay out longer than that, lol. He himself does not stay out too late either. If he does, he is most likely at the masjid. If he makes plans with his friends they are during the day (mostly to play some sports together, etc).
We live on our own, in a different city from family and friends. So here, I dont have a curfew. I hardly go out without husband, but if I do, as long as I tell him what time I am coming home, then he is fine. And if Im going to be late, I call him in advance.
When we are staying at my in-laws (who live in a different city), then I have a curfew. Its not anything set in stone, but he doesnt want me coming home too late when Im out with friends/cousins. I understand that, because we have to respect his parents home. But I dont find it a big deal at all, because he will always extend the timing based on who I am with, where I am going, etc. And he knows who I usually stay out with the latest, and he doesnt mind if I come home late when Im with them.
He follows the same rules, so its not like he puts restrictions on me, then doesnt practice it himself.
I dont have any curfew neither does my husband.. but both of us dont stay out late.. in fact we dont even go out alone!!
Infact I can only think of couple of time where I have had some girls only get together where I thought I was late, around 11pm etc, but he didnt say anything..as long as we keep eachother informed our whereabouts we are good!
Now that I think about it, I feel like we are so clingy, when and if we are out, we are always together :D
