Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

[Theorist]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

^Don't take it personally

Shut up! :D

[TLK]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

@OldSpiceKomodo

First things first.

What were you doing outside your home without your hubby? I believe that's unislamic.

Exactly. On the other hand, doing anything outside your home with your hubby is totally islamic

Please someone "like" this comment, please.

[Disney_Princess]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

@ShahreyarKhan

dont take it personally

if you have a problem with the rules take it up to the One who setup them up

Are you married?? And is OldSpiceKomodo your multi-nick?? :p

[Niksik]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

@ShahreyarKhan

dont take it personally

if you have a problem with the rules take it up to the One who setup them up

I'd love to watch what you do all day and see how Islamic you are...but dang, that would be so haram given that you are a na mehram :@:

[Sara516]

Re: Married women…do you have a “curfew”?

Why do some of you always have to ruin a perfectly good thread

@Naabigh

well atleast let her do pee and poo in the peace - and take your mehram’miyat out of all the places and all the times

That’s disgusting man.

@TLK

Exactly. On the other hand, doing anything outside your home with your hubby is totally islamic

Please someone “like” this comment, please.

[Sara516]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

@Deeba1234

Those who do have 'curfews' do your husbands also come home by a reasonable time?

Good question. My husband is a home body to begin with, aside from family, he doesn't socialize on his own...so the way he is, I wouldn't mind if he came home a little late from work or wanted to meet friends. but if he were the more social type...I'm not sure how I would feel.

@Decent_6Chora

may be, more than 'curfew', its actually 'care' and husband gets 'worried' about wife in dogs-eat-dogs world?

If I have told my wife that I'll be home by 10pm, even she calls me up at 10:30 and ask where I m, if everything is ok and why have i not reached home - and I like it.

@saimab33

I do and I dont!

We live on our own, in a different city from family and friends. So here, I dont have a curfew. I hardly go out without husband, but if I do, as long as I tell him what time I am coming home, then he is fine. And if Im going to be late, I call him in advance.

When we are staying at my in-laws (who live in a different city), then I have a curfew. Its not anything set in stone, but he doesnt want me coming home too late when Im out with friends/cousins. I understand that, because we have to respect his parents home. But I dont find it a big deal at all, because he will always extend the timing based on who I am with, where I am going, etc. And he knows who I usually stay out with the latest, and he doesnt mind if I come home late when Im with them.

He follows the same rules, so its not like he puts restrictions on me, then doesnt practice it himself.

Yes....I think most of it does stem from care and making sure nobody harms us, so it's a good thing. I have known men adn women who were suffocating and overbearing and didn't want their partners meeting even tehir own family! they wanted to monopolize the person's time and keep that person all to thesmelves.

My husband was/is pretty relaxed about me going out. If I tell him where I'm going and when I'll be back, he won't call me unless its important. He used to be more open about it, but I told him about an incident where I was getting out of the train station and I felt someone was following me. When I told him, he didn't say anything at all, so I thought nothing of it, but judging by his behavior after it, I know it worried him.

I usually meet with friends during the day, and if it's at night or if ti's going to be far away, I only go if I know I will have a ride home (since I dont' drive :() and even when I was in canada and staying with in laws, I was able to meet friends a few times, and as far as I know, I never heard anything from my in laws about it and neither did my husband object.

[saks]

Re: Married women…do you have a “curfew”?

@Sara516

a little background:
So this weekend, I went out, and was supposed to come home by a certain time, things ran late and ended later than was supposed to. By that time, I was getting antsy and desperately wanted to get home. I’d called my husband and he just said that it was late and he did sound very annoyed/upset.

For some reason, some (not all) people I meet expect me to be free and not have any curfew just because I’m married. and, technically, I don’t have a curfew. but I know what my husband expects of me and wants from me in this regard…so is that weird then? I admit I start feeling things that are not very rational, but I attribute that to that’s just how I was raised..and as much as I try to cool down and think logically…eh it doesnt work

Now im not complaining about my husband (shocker of all shockers!!!) but the fact that there are those who can’t respect that I have to leave at a certain time. I have known people whose husbands/parents weren’t very strict so they had lots of time to hang out and do whatever…and to some extent I do as well.. and I may not be working and I may not have kids and I admit that my husband may not be “the typical desi husband” (not my words…that’s how he’s been described by my friends) but that doesn’t mean I have unlimited time to hang out.

so yeah, question to the married women..do you have “curfews”? does anyone really have totally and unlimited freedom?

I had the exact same problem. Some of my friends are single and for some reason they dont have any curfews. But when I had to go home at night, they really didnt understand that I have a husband waiting at home for me.

My husband never restricts me from going out with friends, and doesnt set a curfew for me. but he wants me to tell him what time I will be home. Even if its at 3am (which does happen). He just wants to know because he cares. He even comes outside when I’m almost home so he can walk me inside because he knows I get scared easily.

I think the best thing to do is just realize that there will always be people who dont understand ur situation. I dont even care what my friends say now, If my husband wants me at home, then I will be at home no matter what. After all, hes the most important person in my life!

And your friends will eventually understand. Mine do, they know that i have to go home if my husband wants me to.

[hareem01]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

yeah i have a self imposed curfew.

[Summerbr]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

Neither my husband or I have a curfew. He likes me to let him know where I am, what time I'll be back and if I'll be late etc. and he does the same when he's out (as in let's me know). But neither of us has any kind of restriction - we have a great understanding. He hangs out late with friends at times as do I. We're newly married though, so really enjoy spending as much together as we can esp as work takes up so much time! :-)

[lafuriaroja]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

yeh same here, no curfews, we just let each other know when we'll be home and where we are so we know the other is safe. If my husbands coming home late though I'll just go to bed and I won't really know what time he gets home and it works the other way too.

[funky_nails]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

There are no curfews.... as long as u tell eachother whatever ur plans are... this is common sense, nothing to do with husband-wife relation only.
Evryone is making this issue sound like the wifes are the kids in d relationship :s

[Deeba1234]

Re: Married women...do you have a "curfew"?

@ShahreyarKhan

dont take it personally

if you have a problem with the rules take it up to the One who setup them up

'The One' didn't set any rules about a woman needing a mehram just to step out of her house, genius (how would she do her day to day things like grocery shopping if OH is not around?).. There's a set distance she's ok to travel on her own.. Only lunatics and religious fanatics apply the mehram rule to going out full-stop..