After marriage people expect glamour and fun like they see on TV, and exaggerated Indian movies…people can say it can lead to temporary depression following the marriage…I just wanted to say how did you girls feel after your marriage, same as before? I have some aunts who missed their families it can be harder on the girls, I guess because they leave eveything behind
well not married yet.. but i guess they ( as in girls) are just a lil depressed which is understandable, they have to adjust to new atmosphere situation, get used to the idea of responsibilities etc. and i think every sensible girl knows that its not all glamourous life as it appears on the tv shows or movies after wedding. its a different life with ups n downs. there are good days and there are bad days.
Marriage is not the stuff movies are made of but at the same token, it is so important to have a fulfilling, adventurous, and happy relationship with your spouse. I think it's an art to have the kind of relationship where you wake up next to the person each day even after years and years of marriage thinking wow, how did I get so lucky? And again, it takes work on both sides to make that happen.
Salaam Samina mm.
It is true that if a girl married they think
everything is wonderfull like a verytale
our someting but that is'nt.
Im married about 6 years now.
And things are getting different after
your marriage.
And like Suroos said marriage life has also their
ups & downs.
Allah Hafiz.
Nilu (Anila)
Married for three years now...
my hubby my best friend..but we fight.. we are different people who grew up in different worlds so ofcourse there will be a difference.
I think the key is being able to love the other enough to let go of petty issue... (choose your battles) and not letting ANYONE...my mom or his mom interfere... Dont hold him accountable for something his poopie chaachi maami did..
It is not a bed of roses and can often be a bed of thorns, but that all depends on how adaptable and understanding the two parties are.
I think teh leavig family beihind aspect has been discussed before, and in today's day and age most guys, atleast in US live independently after getting married, so in a way they are leaving their at home life beihind too.
The challenge is with getting used to responsibilities, knowing that there is another person who is affected by your choices and actions, and learning to live with one another.
Maturity, communication, mutual respect and love are key ingredients. Also, no one says that life after marriage can not be fun, I suppose it wont be if one married someone who is wrong for them, but think of you life as a spehere and your spouses life as a sphere, after u are married they are overlapping, but teh parts thata re not overlapping should not be affected, you guys should have fun together, and seperately pursue common interests, introduce each other to one's own interests, and then carry on activities that the other person is not interested in at all..e.g. if you like to play squash and your spouse does not, go ahead play with your friends, introduce him/her tpo the sport wh9o knows maybe it wills park some interest, but if does nto dont force it.
biggest thign is go in a relationship with realistic expectations.. those who get into it just thinking its some fairy tail deal and responsibilities etc vanish..should probably nto be getting married.
Well said Fraudia… btw whose tail again?
humari qaum bollywood say bahir niklay to kuch ho! 
^ i know eh, they shud be more into hollywood instead.
Yeah it can be harder on the girl, I think a girl should be prepared to adapt to the new family, you’d be surprised how different things can be.
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*Originally posted by suroor_ca02: *
^ i know eh, they shud be more into hollywood instead.
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What makes you think hollywood would be a better choice? :)
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*Originally posted by BoSS: *
What makes you think hollywood would be a better choice? :)
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Hollywood gives you the reality of divorce.
hehe fairy’s tail nudge nudge wink wink say no more.
qaum bollywood say nikalti is liye naheen hai because they have no other ways to understand what all it takes..
khawateen digest and pakeeza should be banned..they cause mor eproblems than bollywood movies 
well although i m not married as yet but my observation says that it's a GIVE Give realationship where the wife has to compensate for a while. and if she do that well she rules the time ahead.
husbands do have gr8 responsibilities but sadly as v r not the practicing muslims, alot of wife's rigths are eaten.
well said that it is not bed of roses howeverit can be one.
good luck to all of us.
My wedding 
.forget aboot it sweets 
edited
Personally I alway found it annoying after marriage that I was expected to dress up in my fancy joray and go to dawathayn. I was the 'new bride' and i had to be on display for a year after marriage. I just wanted to get real life going and not stand out like that. I agree it was hard to move away from home and not know anyone (not living with in-laws.) But it was also exciting to start a new life with my husband.
saima but what u did is not required. after we got married, my wife and I went to many parties here and there, but dressed appropriately for teh event. There were people who said, why is she not all dressed up, but these were ppl we dinn really give a damn about anyways.
We get trapped in meeting societal expectations of those of extended family. Its good to not create conflicts on minor stuff, but having to do something you dont want to do is a big compromise, and I did not do it for teh sake of extended family ever, and niether did my wife.
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*Originally posted by saimanyc: *
Personally I alway found it annoying after marriage that I was expected to dress up in my fancy joray and go to dawathayn. I was the 'new bride' and i had to be on display for a year after marriage. I just wanted to get real life going and not stand out like that. I agree it was hard to move away from home and not know anyone (not living with in-laws.) But it was also exciting to start a new life with my husband.
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Saima baji that's the most exciting part of a marriage, I look forward to dressing up and attending dinner parties and having everyone's individual attention on me, I can't believe you hated it!!! Everyone's different though.
I feel myself lucky to know my hubby from many years , we spent our bachpaN together , konw him very well and have always been in touch with each other and were kinda close ( we are first cousins) so never had such problems Allhamdoillaha :-)
I know it's diffecult for some people who's family backgrounds and values are different from each other...but somehow it's also intressting as well , isn't it ? get to know some new people and have new friends etc ... ???
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*Originally posted by Shakila ss: *
...that's the most exciting part of a marriage, I look forward to dressing up and attending dinner parties...
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I would enjoy that too :)