Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
I cant believe some of the responses here. If a single daughter is not responsible for financial support of parents thn how does it make sense that a married daughter is responsible??? YES Islam says to both son/daughter to take care of parents which means to respect them, help them with daily chores, daughters are not ordered to go out and earn a living for parents be it young or older unless of course she wants to do so and it is swab for her (common sense) but if she does not want to work she wont get gunnah for not providing for the financial needs of the parents (in my opinion). Same rule applies for a wife, if wants to work and help her husband she can but she wont get gunnah for not working and financially supporting her household. A women job is inside the house while men are supposed to go out of the house and ear a living.If she is married and her husband does not allow her to work thn she should not work even if she wants to work and help her parents.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
I'm sorry but in my opinion if your the only daughter and your parents are too sick to provide you should provide for them. I don't know what is so hard to understand, there is absolutly no difference in responsibilities to parents. If people look in the Quran there is not a seperate verse for boys responsibilities and another one for girls, both sons and daughters are responsible for thier parents. Yes sons may find it easier to give money, but if girls can't give money they should provide labour (cooking, cleaning etc).
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
I cant believe some of the responses here. If a single daughter is not responsible for financial support of parents thn how does it make sense that a married daughter is responsible??? YES Islam says to both son/daughter to take care of parents which means to respect them, help them with daily chores, daughters are not ordered to go out and earn a living for parents be it young or older unless of course she wants to do so and it is swab for her (common sense) but if she does not want to work she wont get gunnah for not providing for the financial needs of the parents (in my opinion). Same rule applies for a wife, if wants to work and help her husband she can but she wont get gunnah for not working and financially supporting her household. A women job is inside the house while men are supposed to go out of the house and ear a living.If she is married and her husband does not allow her to work thn she should not work even if she wants to work and help her parents.
But they can go out and earn money for themselves, makes sense, yeah!
No one is talking about Gunnah or say in English Sin. The common sense should be "Yes, I want to do good deeds" and not - that if I have the chance - I let it go. If your husband doesn't let you work then he should be at least fulfill his duty of being a "Mijaazi Khuda"...If you're considered a "Mijaazi Khuda" for your wife then you should not only feel like "Mijaazi Khuda" but also behave like one.
I don't think it is common sense that you don't support your wife's parents if you don't allow your wife to work. As the Prophet (saw) saiid Be good to your Relatives"...I think I don't need to add anything more.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
Peace All
The provision of money to parents is not done in the attempt to "provide" for them, but it is done through the injunction of obligation. Allah (SWT) is the Provider for all. Even if a family have all daughters and none of them work then if Allah (SWT) chooses they can still receive their sustenance from other means. And if some people don't earn a lot or who are poor then that is their destiny in rizq.
We should never assume our wealth will provide for us or for others. But this is a conversation more suited to the religion section.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
Peace All
The provision of money to parents is not done in the attempt to "provide" for them, but it is done through the injunction of obligation. Allah (SWT) is the Provider for all. Even if a family have all daughters and none of them work then if Allah (SWT) chooses they can still receive their sustenance from other means. And if some people don't earn a lot or who are poor then that is their destiny in rizq.
We should never assume our wealth will provide for us or for others. But this is a conversation more suited to the religion section.
Yes that's all this thread needs, a debate on semantics.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
I imagine a lot of people have pensions and savings and once the kids are out of the house they probably don't need much. There are people who work well into their 60s or even 70s so unless your parents really cannot work, this shouldn't even be a problem. If they can't work, I don't see why the daughter or the husband can't help them out a little but to expect the kids to fully support you should be a last resort IMO.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
I have a friend who is right now supporting her parents physically . emotionally & financially. Her father had a horrible accident last year and he is still going through treatment. Now this friend of mine has all brothers , all grown up , married & working yet she is doing so much for her parents. Now considering what people think how things should be she should have just taken a side and would have left everything on her brothers right ! I don't know why people look at what is your farz and what does you culture allow when doing the right thing. If you are willing to help our parents and fulfil your responsibility you will deal with the problems that will come your way and in my opinion being a woman is no excuse to bail out yourself from the responsibility of your parents. I can understand the problems that might ( and most of the times) comes from husband and inlaws but sitting at home doing nothing just because u r a woman and is not asked by Allah to earn is a lame excuse. This is 21st century and there are so many opportunities out there. Agar koi majboori ya rok tok nahi hai to kisi say samnay hath phelanay sey acha hai kay find a job and earn a respectable living and then fulfil your responsibilities.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
Personally I can see that there is a natural state for women to serve their parents, but men find it more difficult to do that when they are married, because of their responsibilities to their wives and children. As a result it is no wonder that the duty to give to parents is documented for men so it cannot be debated and when it comes to women their natures are already inclined to give to parents anyway.
Islam preserves the rights and duties of patronage and welfare these are two different things.
When a subject of a land presents a gift to his king as an offering of respect when he comes to see him, this is very different to when a rich person presents money to the poor.
The first case is the sense of patronage and the second is the sense of charity. Since parents are in a rank above us and from other wisdoms we cannot give them zakat, although we can give them sadaqah.
If we give money to our parents we do so with humility and subordinance to them, if we support orphans on the other hand then the mindset is different. The reason for this is that parents are already in a position above us and we are always in debted to them, this is not the case with orphans.
When it comes to duty males provide the right that their parents have over them in the form of money, any additional money given is sadaqah. All money given by daughters is sadadah and none of the money should be given out of benevolence but out of duty and subordinance to them.
However to say that a woman must support her parents and if she does not is in any way blameworthy then I reject this claim.
Re: Married daughters being the 'sons of the house'.
Personally I can see that there is a natural state for women to serve their parents, but men find it more difficult to do that when they are married, because of their responsibilities to their wives and children. As a result it is no wonder that the duty to give to parents is documented for men so it cannot be debated and when it comes to women their natures are already inclined to give to parents anyway.
Islam preserves the rights and duties of patronage and welfare these are two different things.
When a subject of a land presents a gift to his king as an offering of respect when he comes to see him, this is very different to when a rich person presents money to the poor.
The first case is the sense of patronage and the second is the sense of charity. Since parents are in a rank above us and from other wisdoms we cannot give them zakat, although we can give them sadaqah.
If we give money to our parents we do so with humility and subordinance to them, if we support orphans on the other hand then the mindset is different. The reason for this is that parents are already in a position above us and we are always in debted to them, this is not the case with orphans.
When it comes to duty males provide the right that their parents have over them in the form of money, any additional money given is sadaqah. All money given by daughters is sadadah and none of the money should be given out of benevolence but out of duty and subordinance to them.
However to say that a woman must support her parents and if she does not is in any way blameworthy then I reject this claim.
so it is blameworthy when a man doesn't support his parents?