Re: Married and Cooking....
You are an intelligent person, I can see that in your reply.
First of all smart guy, I'm not an abcd. Second, I think cooking is a shallow way of judging whether or not your spouse is taking care of you. If that's your yardstick then by all means, measure away. To each their own.
Re: Married and Cooking....
When i got married with my Husband i did'nt know to cook at all.
I've learend it later when i came back in Holland, that time he was
in Pakistan and when he came to Holland i could cook many things.
I dont know why people think if a women cant cook they cant take
care of their husband thats Bull!! But thats typical desi thingy lol
Re: Married and Cooking....
Basically it’s not about cooking only. The thing is us (desi guys) don’t help out in other household work either. Only if we can learn to help out the females (be it mother, sister or wife) at home, I am sure that females will not mind cooking. It’s only when they have to cook with cleaning, laundry, pressing, dish washing and kids that gets on their nerves.
I have few friends who don’t even pickup their plates after finishing the food let alone washing it or cooking the food. Bhabi’s do all the work. I bet if we can learn to do these little things it will change the home climate a lot. I try to help my wife in household work (cooking, dish washing, vacuum etc) and in return she don’t mind if I ask her once in a blue moon to wash the car, do the grocery or press my cloths etc.
To some extent blame goes to females too. I still hear many mothers asking their daughters “ja beta bhai ko khana garam ker dai thaka howa aaya hai” without considering that daughter just came from college/university/work too.
Re: Married and Cooking....
^Agreed.
That said, cooking is a life skill, like doing the laundry or putting gas in your car, that everyone should know how to do before they turn 18. I am teaching all of my kids to cook, sew, clean, and do laundry.
All kids, boys included, should learn a few basic recipes to get them through. If your are pakistani, then that might include a basic salan, omelet, roti, salad, keema, and a couple of daal dishes. You can go on from there. If your mom is not close by, there are some decent cookbooks and lots of web sites with good recipes. If you can read you can cook. It just takes practice to get the techniques right.
If an old gori like me can learn how to cook just about any pakistani dish and teach my kids, then surely you girls, who have your moms around to teach you can learn. :)
Re: Married and Cooking....
its the confidence....that holds me back....and then i am always scared that i might get a comment or two....thats my biggest problem....but i observe a lot...whenever someone is cooking i watch and ask tons of questions.
Re: Married and Cooking....
I cooked a little bit before I was married. But only when I felt like it -- not because I was expected to. I've gotten better at cooking since marriage, but I have also gotten more efficient. I have a better sense of the way food works together, and I don't get as stressed. When I cooked before the wedding, it would be a big deal, and I'd have to devote a whole day to making one dish, because I didn't have a sense of what was needed. Now I can do ten things at once. But I only cook when I want to or if hubby is really in the mood for something I made. If I'm exhausted, we order food or go out.
However, I do think I baked more often before marriage. I'm trying to pick that up again. Just made delicious banana chocolate chip bread the other day :D
Re: Married and Cooking....
whoops -- duplicate.
Re: Married and Cooking....
^ before i got married i mostly baked too.....and it would take me a whole day to make something...like literally...now i am a little better....
Re: Married and Cooking....
don't take me wrong.. but it is such a turn off to ask lot of questions about cooking from someone. from someone very close to you like your mom or sister is OK but from every other person is very irritating. Trust me, we do talk behind someone who presents totally dumb to herself in cooking and stuff... sense of cooking is like a sense of cleaning .. so what's so hard to learn about it? just dont let any kinda comments to hold you back and just do a little practice to get into the pace :)
Re: Married and Cooking…
we dun appreciate womans who can,t cook:barbie: …itna barha zulm aur woh bi hummarai saath:mad: …jao khana banana seekho:barbie:…
Re: Married and Cooking....
i only knew how to make chinese food,,baking or snacks...@ moms house there were cook, and i was in hostel for almost 5 yrs ,,all of my sisters and bro ,,were in hostel....when i got married the first thing i cooked was dall,,and i was sooo stupid that i did;nt know how to bhagar it....my hubby helped me a lot aur shouq bhee huwa so tried diffrent things and nowwwwwwwww iam the best cook in my susral..40-50 ka khana cook kerna koee problem nahee,,so i think it depend on you also..kai how much intrest u have in cooking or painting or any thing....so keep trying diffrent things,,,(my daughter she hates cooking:()
Re: Married and Cooking....
I was actually interested in learning how to cook before I got married so my mom wrote down her recipes and I followed them until I was able to do things by andaza on my own. This doesn't mean I'm a great cook, but I can get by and there is always shan masala for dawats :)
Re: Married and Cooking....
Personal preference. I have picked up cooking, because I have to now. However, I find myself enjoying it and I use it as a stress-reliever. So when I want a break, I cook something for the fun of it.
I don't see it as a chore.
And I definitely don't see it being a only-for-women activity. I know lots of girls who can't cook, and I know lots of guys who do.
Re: Married and Cooking....
mera someone ka mathlab tha meri ami, meri bhabi's, yah meri close cousin....bus.....sub kay saath nahi.....mein ithni bhi pagal nahi hoon....i know some form of cooking...lekin i ask stupid questions as to how u can tell if the masala is mixed with the oil and if the chicken is cooked properly......my mom has a slighly different method than my bhabi and my cousin has a way different method than my mom....so thats why i ask to better my cooking knowledge....its not that i can't cook anything....i know how to make chicken salan, i made daal once, mattar chawal, channay, and keema.....but i know i am a beginner so i want to better my cooking skills thats why i ask questions....
Re: Married and Cooking....
I burnt the grilled cheese sandwich..twice :(
Re: Married and Cooking....
Btw, ia m not married.
Cooking for the same number of people all the time is much easier than cooking at different times for different number of people. I don't think it is about practice but about conviction & interest. I only started cooking in the last two years and I have never burnt anything, not even once. At times when I cook for my wife, she feels slightly jealous that my food tastes better than hers.
Re: Married and Cooking....
My mom always made me and my sister (and sometimes my bro) help her cook on Saturday morning. It was always the routine- Saturday was the cooking day. She first introduced us to stirring the pot..what to look for..when to add masala, water, oil etc. Then she moved us up to cleaning meat. Finally she got us to make stuff while she supervised. As we went along, my sis and I would write down the recipes.
Now that I'm married, my mil does most of the cooking- she's at home and we all go over for dinner. Sometimes I cook stuff at home and bring it over for everyone to eat. Or I tell ammi to relax and I'm taking over.
It's all good!
Re: Married and Cooking....
hmm..why wouldnt a woman know how to cook.. what r they teaching in those home economic classes anyways?
