Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
Hey you generalized about women who choose not to be sit at home moms yourself to begin with.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
It is not defensiveness Saiman...it is another viewpoint. I am trying to understand what makes you think that kids with stay at home moms but missing fathers (i.e. in residency) are better off than those whose moms work or those that have nannies. Almost all parents that I know, try to spend as much time with their kids. Here is a little nugget. Even mom's that don;t work, like my wife until 6 months ago, use nannies. Want to know why? Because we feel it is important that she enjoys her motherhood by taking care of the child and having the ability to do things that she wants, like nails, lunch with friends etc. that she also finds fulfilling. Raising a child is hard work. It requires both parents. In America there is an absence of the extended family concept. This "desi mothers at home" is an imported paradigm.
I don't understand why desi people think that if you are railing against conventional desi mentality you are being defensive.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
why do people assume that just cus the mum works, her kids are gonna grow up to be gunde or something?
Its all about balance and priorities..
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
Perhaps both of you have really different views on how children can and should be raised..i think both ways have great qualities...but just the same...each way has its own shortcomings...
I think if you have found the formula that works for your children then thats great...but thats not the way all kids should be raised.... it is what works for your family, your child and your lifestyle....Raising kids is a tough job however you do it..
S.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
And the biggest factor that people here are missing is the child!
I dont know about you guys, but I know that each child comes packaged with a different personality. Of course, most of the personality is due to environment, but BY NATURE, some children prefer some activities over others.
I know when I was growing up as a kid, most of my activities were solo-activities. I asked my mom to drive me to the library once a week, I picked up as many books as I could check out on my card, and I took 'em home and I READ. No mommie involved. She helped me with my first book and after that I was on my own way. In fact, I asked my teacher for all help on academic kind of stuff.
At home, if I wasn't reading books, I had the TV on. If I didnt have the TV on, I was giving my barbies a boycut haircut. If I wasn't doing that, I was giving myself a haircut. And if I wasn't doing that I was organizing my shell collection or painting or drawing.
I honestly dont remember much I ever did with my mom, and I actually preferred it that way as a child.
And by the way, my mom was a sit at home mom. I think she wasted her time looking after me. All she really did was cook my food.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
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Its not the HAVING of pre-conceived notions that is bad. It is the HAVING of the WRONG pre-conceived notions that is bad.
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Sorry, but this doesn't fly.
It is a person's preogative to marry anyone [inside law] they can. I repeat, why is it sick for doctors to look for a housewife who is willing to manage the house and its affairs in their absence?
Not all women want to be the bread-winners and contrary to what you seem to think there are girls out their who will be perfectly willing to play second fiddle to their husbands as long as they are provided with everything they seek. As long as both parties are happy, I can't really see what's the contention here.
Unless you provide some justification for this incredibly twisted point of view it sounds suspiciously like some crappy second-wave feminist bull**** that is bandied left and right these days.
Screw marriage. ****buddies are much more fun and far less hassle.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
isn't it all about what works best for the couple themselves? every marriage is different like finger prints and so are their financial situation. not every parent can afford a nanny and some do want to stay at home by choice. what matters is the "quality" not "quantity" time u r spending with ur kids and ur kids are growing up to be sensible reasonable individuals.
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
i agree. and to take it further, granted that there is over rating of marriages of women at an early stage in life - supposedly to get settled, who is to say that if given a chance like the rest of human kind, they might out do a lot of the apprehensions and on top of that, if at a maturer more stable age, they do choose a worthy partner and begin a content married chapter in their lives, would it not be a Wow, then at that time?
Re: marriage for females...isnt it a bit overrated?
Guys have cooties :p
Re: marriage for females…isnt it a bit overrated?
One reason to have a sense of urgency about it is that the longer you wait, the harder it may be to find someone you like.
I’m a man so my own opinion may not be what you’re looking for, but in my case I just think that I should have got married earlier so that my wife and I could have been part of each other’s life from an earlier time.
Maybe nobody is going to say that they regret getting married, but they might say that they wish that they would have waited longer or got it done sooner if they think that they should have done something differently.