Marriage falling apart :(

[lafuriaroja]

Re: Marriage falling apart

@redvelvet

I know that we often make the above highlighted comment in Nadz’s threads. But with Nadz, it’s just an issue of attitude adjustment and does not involve overly serious concerns such as the possibility severing a marriage. As someone else said above that the situation is likely to be more complex/delicate than it comes across in the posts. There has been a lot of emotional investment in the past 6 years and I’m not saying this reason alone is justification for staying in the marriage. Whether she decides to stay in the marriage…or whether she decides to get a divorce…whether she decides to have kids…or pursue a career…all of these decisions will have consequences. They require a lot of thought and the weighing of pros and cons…and it would be better if this is done without receiving a guilt-trip. Maybe taking a break might provide some relief and perspective, but I don’t think that the decision to end a marriage can be rushed. I also don’t think the advice given has necessarily gone to waste. Sometimes talking things out can help people figure out…at a later point…what they need to do. And hopefully Istikhara will give her some direction.

I agree with redvelvet, I don’t think this situation is as simple and as black and white as it seems. Clearly the OP and her SO love each other but unfortunately sometimes love is not enough to make a marriage work. The in laws issue obviously doesn’t help. But 6 years of a relationship comes with a lot of emotional ties and it can’t be easy to take a big step each other way.

OP I think the best thing for you is to pray and take some time out to heal yourself, you need to go to therapy if for nothing else than to have someone else to confide in and talk to. Work on getting yourself healthy mentally first and then inshallah you will be able to figure out your next move with a clearer head.