this * we shouldnt even smile in the month of moharam as its a sad month for muslims* is desi crap. there is no such thing as celeberating death anniversaries in islam just like birthdays dont hold any value in islam either. arabs do weddings in te month of moharam... so do indonesians and other muslims.. its just us desis that have made up our own rulings for diff ocassaions. there is no chaliswa in islam, there are no khatums, no majlis' .. if such things dont exist, then there really are no happy or sad days.
as for the main topic at hand.. no one can tell you how its gonna be. every situation is diff and every family is diff... the fact that they are pretty liberal makes it a tad bit easier for you... but just go in with an open mind , rest all will follow ... :)
well i dont have anything in avoiding those 4-5 days if it makes them happy. i know for a fact that i wouldnt have to attend any majlis or anythin bcz my fiancee has never attended one in his whole life.
i had a fight with him because he was not going out with my on 10th. i was leaving the next day to khi.. i would not have fought but my lil sister made alot of fuss that he is cancelling at the last minute etc. although he told a week before that he wont come since its 10th mohorram.
i dont understand why people make this such a big issue.. but is anyone married in different sects?
khawateen: yes i agree with you that there are no chaleeswa etc in islam. we have adopted all of this from the indians.
in saudia arabia they dont even celebrate eid milad un nabi.
umm...ok seriously? you were fighting with this dude cuz his mom requested that you guys don't go out to dinner for ONE DAY out of all the days in the year?
i smell trouble. obviously you don't compromise easily....and being this lady's future DIL, it was your responsibility to look up all the dates and make sure that you didn't plan any dinners/dates for those 10 days that she considers "mournful". its called havin respect for your MIL. whether its a shia/sunni thing or muslim/nonmuslim. i mean, if she's requesting only 10 days out of the whole year for you to sit your bum at home, then i would def do it no matter what reasons she had behind it, instead of fighting with her son over it n makin his life difficult.
well i dont have anything in avoiding those 4-5 days if it makes them happy. i know for a fact that i wouldnt have to attend any majlis or anythin bcz my fiancee has never attended one in his whole life.
i had a fight with him because he was not going out with my on 10th. i was leaving the next day to khi.. i would not have fought but my lil sister made alot of fuss that he is cancelling at the last minute etc. although he told a week before that he wont come since its 10th mohorram.
i dont understand why people make this such a big issue.. but is anyone married in different sects?
didnt u and your sister make it a big issue by complaining that he cancelled at the last minute, when obviously you KNEW that 10th of moharram was gonna be coming BEFORE you booked your flight?
this * we shouldnt even smile in the month of moharam as its a sad month for muslims* is desi crap. there is no such thing as celeberating death anniversaries in islam just like birthdays dont hold any value in islam either. arabs do weddings in te month of moharam... so do indonesians and other muslims.. its just us desis that have made up our own rulings for diff ocassaions. there is no chaliswa in islam, there are no khatums, no majlis' .. if such things dont exist, then there really are no happy or sad days.
as for the main topic at hand.. no one can tell you how its gonna be. every situation is diff and every family is diff... the fact that they are pretty liberal makes it a tad bit easier for you... but just go in with an open mind , rest all will follow ... :)
So what exactly are you trying to imply, One thing i can never understand why do individuals like you try to impose there belief system on others, what might be crap for you might not be crap to someone else this is no way to get someone to agree! All you will ever achieve this way is aggravation of someone's emotions and sentiments. If you don't agree with something just say you don't there is no need to call someone else's belief system crap, rubbish or anything else as no one is forcing you to believe what they are believing. As far as I know and most people will agree mutual respect one of the main lessons of Islam, It is with our actions how we can change people no one will ever listen to a person or take there opinions seriously if all they are hearing are obscenities about what they believe.
It does not matter if you are Sunni or Shiite first you must learn how to speak to people else you are simply wasting your time as no one really cares about an individuals opinion who has no manners of how to converse or communicate with people.
this * we shouldnt even smile in the month of moharam as its a sad month for muslims* is desi crap. there is no such thing as celeberating death anniversaries in islam just like birthdays dont hold any value in islam either. arabs do weddings in te month of moharam... so do indonesians and other muslims.. its just us desis that have made up our own rulings for diff ocassaions. there is no chaliswa in islam, there are no khatums, no majlis' .. if such things dont exist, then there really are no happy or sad days.
if ur NOW married in a sect which is not like urs... hell it ain't a big issue. Aaj kul kay zamanay mein logoun mein dheema pan aur ehtaraam aik duusray ka bilkul hatum ho gaya hai. kya zaroorat hai itna bara scene kernay ki... kyun larai kerna is baat per jo hogi hai "unki" favor mein and then u have to regret it after-wards. Think wisely, fazool ki larai, donoun ka mood off aur nateeja kuch bhi nahi
insaan ko her pehlu dekh ker step uthana chahiye hai
but you are at that point in your life where you have lived a married life and you are also a mother. She is still in her engagement period and expectations from each other are at it’s peak during this period. So I’d say it would be good for her only to listen & follow suggestions from experienced Guppies.
korn666 is saying right but if u r saying dat he is least intersted in sects then he should nt hv over reacted on this issuue...then mayb at times he is under pressure of his mom or try to b balanced in both sects...dont know it is gr888 debate n such grown up ppl in 2 diff sects remain unable to join 1 properly n on the other side he also wants to abey his parents...the bst thing for u is,if u luves him dat keep doin agree on these points (if sect is not big issuue for u) u guys will b happily living then...
So what exactly are you trying to imply, One thing i can never understand why do individuals like you try to impose there belief system on others, what might be crap for you might not be crap to someone else this is no way to get someone to agree! All you will ever achieve this way is aggravation of someone's emotions and sentiments. If you don't agree with something just say you don't there is no need to call someone else's belief system crap, rubbish or anything else as no one is forcing you to believe what they are believing. As far as I know and most people will agree mutual respect one of the main lessons of Islam, It is with our actions how we can change people no one will ever listen to a person or take there opinions seriously if all they are hearing are obscenities about what they believe.
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its not my belief. i dont pick and choose or sometimes make up my own belief. its a FACT that there is no such thing as majlis', khatums, barsis, etc etc etc in ISLAM. so yes, its all indo-pak made up crap. its not islam. it pisses me off cuz even though its not in islam, we still cant hold weddings in pakistan during the month of moharam cuz of PPL. not allah, but mere human beings.
im not trying to change anyone nor care ... ppl can believe in whatever they wanna believe. was just stating a fact.
:) peace.
we can go on and on ... but then feel free to open another thread as i dont wanna ruin this one for the OP
