End of STORY1st: about this Hadith Bukhari - narrated Abu Hurairah “If a man calls his wife to bed and she refuses, and then he sleeps angry, the angels shall curse her until he awakens.” Vol 4 Book 54 Relation 460 abviously if “marital rape” was allowed and ok, then there will be an advice to the husband to take what he wants by force, but there is none. and this Hadith is about the Husband’s rights , as there are Hadiths about the wife’s rights .
in the Holy Quran there is many verses that order men to treat their wives in a way that pleases God. Allas says in the Holy Quran(Tafsir Ibn Kathir-the best tafsir imo ) (19. O you who believe! You are not permitted to inherit women against their will, nor to prevent them from marriage in order to get part of (the dowry) what you have given them, unless they commit open Fahishah. And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good.) meaning ﴿وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ﴾ (And live with them honorably), by saying kind words to them, treating them kindly and making your appearance appealing for them, as much as you can, just as you like the same from them.
Allah said in another Ayah, ﴿وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِى عَلَيْهِنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ﴾ (And they have rights similar over them to what is reasonable) ﴿2:228﴾. The Messenger of Allah said, «خَيْرُكُمْ خَيْرُكُمْ لِأَهْلِهِ، وَأَنَا خَيْرُكُمْ لِأَهْلِي» (The best among you is he who is the best with his family. Verily, I am the best one among you with my family.)
It was the practice of the Messenger of Allah to be kind, cheerful, playful with his wives, compassionate, spending on them and laughing with them. The Messenger used to race with A'ishah, the Mother of the Faithful, as a means of kindness to her. A’ishah said, "The Messenger of Allah raced with me and I won the race. This occurred before I gained weight, and afterwards I raced with him again, and he won that race. He said, «هذِهِ بِتِلْك» (This ﴿victory ﴾ is for that ﴿victory﴾.)‘’
Allah said, ﴿لَّقَدْ كَانَ لَكُمْ فِى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ أُسْوَةٌ حَسَنَةٌ﴾ (Indeed in the Messenger of Allah you have a good example to follow) ﴿33:21﴾. Allah said, ﴿فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَى أَن تَكْرَهُواْ شَيْئاً وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْراً كَثِيراً﴾ (If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good.)
Allah says that your patience, which is demonstrated by keeping wives whom you dislike, carries good rewards for you in this life and the Hereafter. Ibn `Abbas commented on this Ayah, "That the husband may feel compassion towards his wife and Allah gives him a child with her, and this child carries tremendous goodness.‘’ An authentic Hadith states,
Source:http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090201221540AAvYSENI
din’t had the time to write it all and thus found a befitting answer online.
Conclusion:Both men and women have their rights.It is responsibility of both to care for each other.No forced or martial sex is justified by any laws whatsoever.Both hubby and wife should have good understanding,high drive is not abnormal but both should compromise a bit to keep each other happy.I am a strong protagonist of female rights as they are the ones who suffer=open world environment=reality.Fear ALLAH(S.A.W) and treat your wives fair and square.Make/keep them happy and you will succeed.p.s if a spouse is continuously ignoring his hubby(he goes senti/emo) then the wife is to blame