Thank you all for responses. Now for some context.
I live in NYC, work here. I wasn’t born here but spent some of my teens and graduate school here. Parents live here as well. SO is an Indian - so am I. He came over for graduate school and stayed to work as did I. I know him from undergrad.
Reln with God - I posted this in Life rather than religion so I could just concentrate on the practical aspect. (Ok, I’ve also seen some of the threads on Religion and wouldn’t dare post there!). I would consider myself religious in that I certainly believe in God, pray, keep roza etc. Yes, I am aware that it isn’t the best thing I could be doing - however,I’m unwilling to think of it as something of a crime. My BF is one of the nicest ppl I’ve known. He’s everything I could have wished for. So he chooses to worship God in a different way -that’s all. Is that so bad? (Rhetorical question, please don’t pull the trigger!)
It’s curious because I would never have considered marrying an atheist.
As for ‘pyar kiya tho darna kya’ - I want to clarify that neither of us is afraid or is likely to balk. We just want to cause as little hurt as possible to the 'rents so we can have a unbroken reln with them.
SO’s religious belief - He is a practicing Hindu and curiously sees nothing objectionable in a different way of worship.
He explained this as Vedic belief - Ekam sat - viprah bahudi vendanti (Truth is one, the wise call it by many names) . Heh! I actually remembered that! It makes it easier for me that he’s an Arya Samaaji - they aren’t into too much into idol worship/temple going, more of a monotheist, vedic oreintation, less imagery. He IS a staunch vegetarian though!
He wouldn’t convert and I wouldn’t ask him - he could, and would turn, around and ask the same thing of me.
Pretending to convert - we probably will have to pretend to door ke relatives/acquaintances on both sides esp where his sister’s marriage is concerned, but we wouldn’t want to lie to parents..
Parents - I’m pretty confident of bringing mom around, not least because dad’s newfound conservatism is driving her up the wall. His parents live in Bombay. They’ll be visiting for Navratri/Diwali this year. Asked him to bring his closest friends home. He’s told them that would be his childhood chum and me. He said they all exchanged looks among themselves but said nothing..
So we’ll see how that goes .. brrrr…nervous. His youngest sister kinda knows and I think has the perception that Muslims are very judgemental re: religion and that I’d come home and declaim, denounce and pronounce judgement on their way of life..Wonder where they could have got that impression from. Rolling eyes.
Children - They will grow up both hindu and muslim - …that’s the idea.. runs for cover
Funerals (!!!) - umm…I suppose I would be buried and he would be burnt.. why would this be a problem?
Food! - Food at home would be vegetarian. No compromise. I’d need to fulfill my cravings when I eat out. He doesn’t smoke or drink. Arya Samaajis believe alcohol is evil. Chalk up one more in his favour. 
Last but not least - like I said, I’m an only child, and have always promised myself that I would only choose someone who would allow me to support my parents in old age financially and emotionally..not least because dad is not very “clever” when it comes to money - I can’t count the number of times he’s been taken for a ride by fast-talking investment advisors!
BF is completely understanding of how I would want to be there for them just as he would want to.
Misc - I know of at least two acquaintances back in the desh who had similar marriages - one was a hindu-gal - muslim boy, and another vice-versa. Good news is - both marriages are going strong. Bad news is - in both cases the girl’s parents cut off all relationship with the couple. It’s the one thing I want to avoid!