I wanted to know the opinions of my fellow desis in this topic.
Would you guys prefer to have a love marriage or an arranged marriage?
It is difficult to find the one you love before marriage because our desi culture doesn’t really allow us to date or interact with the opposite sex as much.
However, i think for quite a lot of us who have had some western influence the idea of an arranged marriage is difficult, well at least for me it is.
What are your thoughts on this?? How should one deal with this problem? Western mindset of love marriage and at the same time not interacting with the opposite sex because of culture, no way of finding the one you love.
born and bred within the western culture, and prefer the arranged option. Its easier and less messy. Who says its not possible to fall in love with someone who's come about by the arranged marriage route. Its all about the getting to know stage which determines whether you and the other person are compatible. Gone are the days (nearly) where parents force their children to marry who they want under their terms. Nowadays arranged doesnt feel like its 'arranged' coz many ppl get to know their other half before they actually say kabool hai!
I personally think alot of people are becoming more open minded about the arranged route coz you get to understand one another's opinions before any steps are taken further.
^ iagree with your opinion, but i still had a love marraige, and from my experience its all about the compatability, i think if my marriage had been arranged by my parents to my hubby i would have fallen in love with him.
what if your love marriage is also engaged marriage? there is nothing bad at all in love marriage if you involves your parents. but without your parents permission and involvement this is really wrong. i am sharing my personal experience. my marriage is a love and arrange marriage. we both liked each other. instead we took our affair till 2,3 years we talk to our families and we got married.after this we did not met each other till we got married.. there is nothing bad at all if the marriages happened like this.
I opted for a love marriage because I had seen my parents choices with my siblings and I have to say, I was not impressed. My parents did try very hard but they really failed to take into account my brother and sisters personality, likes, dislikes, preferences in a person etc. They just wanted them married because they thought they were getting too old.
I havent actually married, but I do feel me and my fiance are very compatible with each other. I respect him and his differences and he respects mine. It's not just "love" but a feeling of mutual understanding, compromise and trust which makes me think that love marriages are a whole lot better.
what if your love marriage is also engaged marriage? there is nothing bad at all in love marriage if you involves your parents. but without your parents permission and involvement this is really wrong. i am sharing my personal experience. my marriage is a love and arrange marriage. we both liked each other. instead we took our affair till 2,3 years we talk to our families and we got married.after this we did not met each other till we got married.. there is nothing bad at all if the marriages happened like this.
When i was referring to my love marriage, it was my choice but with my parents blessing, i would never have done it without their consent
and one should see if there family allow them to have chosse ther lifepartner then ....other wise its just the waste of time for ur self and other bcoz when the time comes people jus say sorry our parents will not allow.
love or arrange compromise is every where so its u who has to make ur married life successful....and the top if u love some one u have to over come the issues thats the most beautiful part and thats only if he/she is on right small issues etc.
never think that he/she was before like that now change ........
and one should see if there family allow them to have chosse ther lifepartner then ....other wise its just the waste of time for ur self and other bcoz when the time comes people jus say sorry our parents will not allow.
love or arrange compromise is every where so its u who has to make ur married life successful....and the top if u love some one u have to over come the issues thats the most beautiful part and thats only if he/she is on right small issues etc.
never think that he/she was before like that now change ........
Some parents change their minds.. kids should at least try and see what happens if they really like someone..
Admins, can we merge ALL arranged vs. love marriage threads and pin it to the top already?
LOL
I agree, I've been on GS less than a year and I've seen this thread in various incarnations at least half dozen times already. At least this one hasn't yet devolved in a 'pissing contest' as Sara516 says. :)
before my marriage(which was a love/arranged one cos of the blessing of both sets of parents)i had always felt that i didnt want an arranged marriage at all, but thinking about it now, if id have had the chance to meet and get to know the guy,id have considered it i guess. it doesnt matter now anyway cos im married and happy :)
bhai hum to sirf shaadi key muntazir hain, key kaash koi larkee haan karey aur mein DOOLHA banoon ab love ya arrange merey ko tension lenee hee nahi :k:
