Looking for sincere advice to save my family

[Sara516]

@someone_alone

**
hopefully she got agree to comeback and all things got settled, otherwise I don’t where should I go child custody ,2nd marriage **
..

there will be many person who are aware to these sort of problem..I am looking for sincere advice ..for me the life of my kids is the most important .

do pray for me at least ..

@someone_alone

I checked with lawyers ,according to him ,mother has more rights for the kids when they are young (7/9 years)..after that father has more rights for custody. but if got married , i will lose that right ..so if she didn’t come back **i have to choose one either got married and start a new life and forget the last four years of my life or wait ,kill myself, go to court and then take care of kids as single father..
**

How in the world is a second marriage a solution to your problems? Do you seriously honestly think that getting married will be a solution? HOW is ti even a choice? By considering this, you show exactly how much you want to save your situation.

Let me tell you one thing-- you may be “right” and you may be “perfect” but you’re still alone. So doe s it matter?

[sheyn]

Re: Looking for sincere advice to save my family

Frankly I think he just wants someone to agree with him that a second marriage is the solution to everything so he can justify it , I suppose.

---

All I see here is self pitying posts , you have yet to post one thing on how you want this to work . Be a man and grow a pair !

[Monk]

@someone_alone

what was my part in the fight was that i told her that your upbringing is not good ,you are not responsible, your parents didn’t tell you to respect your hubby and take care of him..

What exactly made you say that?? What ticked U off , so much??
Is it becasue she did not respect you—during a fight? hmmm… were you seeking “majazi khuda” kind respect.

[Barfii]

Re: Looking for sincere advice to save my family

You’ve portrayed yourself as the “victim” here.. You’ve gone on about how you’re missing the kids and how you have no sakoon blah blah blah..

..but the real “victims” here are your Wife and Kids!

As the previous poster said, you should “grow a pair” and swallow your pride…

[Monk]

Re: Looking for sincere advice to save my family

Dude if there is nothing major wrong with the wife, I say be a man and bring her back. What ever it takes.
Stop getting into too much details. you two have lived together, have babies together what hell more do you want?
That if she is not a serial killer of turn into vampire at night.(vampire thing can be good in a way)

[Iyla]

Re: Looking for sincere advice to save my family

go to pakistan, spend time with her, your kids and slowly, kindly, gently talk to her about all the probs (without her parents in the same room or anyone else), clear up the problems, convince her to come back.

if her parents say anything offensive, then listen and ignore…just dont answer back because its not worth it. this will just create a fight and more probs when two people are so heated.

getting married again is not the solution. this will cause her so much hurt and your kids will find this confusing and hurting too. maybe you are thinking this because you want to get revenge on her. maybe this will make things worse for you. dont contact her for a couple of days, clear your head up a bit, when you feel relaxed then call her and go to pakistan to collect her.

prehaps you could seek professional help from doctor. nothing embrassing about that at all. hope things work out for you. inshallah. best of luck.

[someone_alone]

Re: Looking for sincere advice to save my family

Thanks for all the advices (bitter/sweet) but all of them have intentation that I can save my family ( when I say Family it means Wife, kids)..
I am planning to go there next week ,Insha’Allah will go there to in-laws home and trying to solve the issue..inshAllah I will update you once this got progress

Do remember me in your prays..

[Deeba1234]

@djmi

**I agree with everyone else here, you need to start respecting your wife. Go to Pakistan and solve the problem.
I think you need to be a man and start taking your own decisions, instead of running to your mothers lap and hiding like a boy. Im sorry but you sound like my ex husband, he needed to grow a spine as well, but he kept hiding behind his parents like a 5 yr old. **
If you want to save your family then you have to take actions instead of asking your wife to take action.
And like others here have said, there must have been something serious that your wife has left and doesnt want to go back. If you could accept and share your mistakes and problems here, we would be able to help further.

Agree, time to cut the umbilical cord..