How do you console someone who is away ? I am just too worried .
Fiance is in Waziristan since May . He did come twice for Eid .
I got done with my graduation in May and moved to another city . I was miserable for a few months . New city , no friends , no studies, him being away .He calls often from land line which also is dead most of the times . However We have never been in a same city . It has always been a long distance relationship but at least there is phone , skype , texting or he comes to see me often . But ever since he has been deployed in Waziristan , It has been too much for both of us . There is no other mode of communication except for the land line which is hardly accessible . It has been difficult for both of us . His work station is not also in the main town , but somewhere in the outskirts where there isn’t much to do . All he has to do is stay at his check post and kill time . Thanks to god that the operation situation is under control . The threats are obviously there , but tensions have eased a bit .
I have been trying hard to keep myself occupied all the time to keep my sanity . But obviously I was doing better than him because at least I do have people around me . I still have a life here . On the other hand , He already is emotional while I am not that emotional.
Recently I got admission in another program in my dream university and I’ll be moving again to another city and I am very much happy about it .
Since few weeks he has been very very upset . I don’t know what is it and I can’t understand how to comfort him . He has not even called since a few days . I know he must be feeling lonely , It is’nt easy living there all alone , away from everyone .
But I am assuming can it be the reason that he might be feeling that I have learned to live without him , which is making him upset . As I told him that I was happy about starting my studies again .
Whatever the reasons are , I just feel help less . I want him to stay happy and motivated . I can’t see him being so down and hopeless . What can I do to make him feel good ?
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
How do you console someone who is away ? I am just too worried .
Fiance is in Waziristan since May . He did come twice for Eid .
I got done with my graduation in May and moved to another city . I was miserable for a few months . New city , no friends , no studies, him being away .He calls often from land line which also is dead most of the times . However We have never been in a same city . It has always been a long distance relationship but at least there is phone , skype , texting or he comes to see me often . But ever since he has been deployed in Waziristan , It has been too much for both of us . There is no other mode of communication except for the land line which is hardly accessible . It has been difficult for both of us . His work station is not also in the main town , but somewhere in the outskirts where there isn't much to do . All he has to do is stay at his check post and kill time . Thanks to god that the operation situation is under control . The threats are obviously there , but tensions have eased a bit .
I have been trying hard to keep myself occupied all the time to keep my sanity . But obviously I was doing better than him because at least I do have people around me . I still have a life here . On the other hand , He already is emotional while I am not that emotional.
Recently I got admission in another program in my dream university and I'll be moving again to another city and I am very much happy about it .
Since few weeks he has been very very upset . I don't know what is it and I can't understand how to comfort him . He has not even called since a few days . I know he must be feeling lonely , It is'nt easy living there all alone , away from everyone .
But I am assuming can it be the reason that he might be feeling that I have learned to live without him , which is making him upset . As I told him that I was happy about starting my studies again .
Whatever the reasons are , I just feel help less . I want him to stay happy and motivated . I can't see him being so down and hopeless . What can I do to make him feel good ?
I know it's old school, but are can you write letters to each other? send parcels??
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
I am assuming that he is in one of the Armed forces. First of all, you have to keep defender of nation happy somehow :)
and now to main point, I believe that you can use inter-services mail to send him letters to his post. I remember family of my friend who was deployed to FATA and SIACHEN used to send him mail through that service (But that was around 10 years ago, so please check).
Being upset and feeling down is pretty normal when you are in middle of a battle (specially gun battle). I am sure he see things that cant be unseen. Drop him motivating letters, "reasonably" romantic letters (I said reasonably because its still just an engagement ) and pics, including family pics. Those personal things are great moral booster for men on front-lines. They need to be told constantly that there are loved ones who are thinking about them.
oh yeah, if he knows that you GS, tell him that we all love him and salutes him. :)
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
Is it safe to send letters or could they be intercepted by enemy and manipulated, used for nefarious reasons or blow cover of where military is posted?
Unlike in America we rarely hear the support for families of military personnel in Pakistan on the forefront of war with these terrorists that are attacking Pakistan.
Ma'am I thank you for all the sacrifice you and your family are giving to keep us all safe and may your duas be accepted. I hope you get to be reunited with him soon.
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
I am thankful to all of you for your concern and best wishes .
I can't write to him . It isn't safe . Letters can be sent to Siachen because it is not a war zone , but in Waziristan there is greater risk involved . There is a risk of leakage of sensitive information like an officer's name , designation ,unit and area of posting and all .
I think there isn't much that I can do . = (
I just have to count days and wait for him to return or wait for his next call .
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
I am thankful to all of you for your concern and best wishes .
I can't write to him . It isn't safe . Letters can be sent to Siachen because it is not a war zone , but in Waziristan there is greater risk involved . There is a risk of leakage of sensitive information like an officer's name , designation ,unit and area of posting and all .
I think there isn't much that I can do . = (
I just have to count days and wait for him to return or wait for his next call .
That's what I figured, Waziristan seems to have high security concerns. I wouldn't blow his cover. Be patient. I hope he comes back safely to you.
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
I am assuming that he is in one of the Armed forces. First of all, you have to keep defender of nation happy somehow :)
oh yeah, if he knows that you GS, tell him that we all love him and salutes him. :)
May God keep all sons of soil protected! Aameen
I second all these sentiments. May he come back to you safely.
Keep yourself busy. The more busy you are the less you'll have downtime to think about him. Meanwhile, write letters to him, make little parcels of gifts for him, but don't mail them. Keep them safe in a drawer and give all of them to him when he arrives home. This way you will be able to express all your worries and sentiments, and he'll have something to read when he's at home recovering.
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
Hey I hope I am not late. Well this sounds like my situation. After Niqah my husband is deployed in Waziristan as well. And it has been really hard for us since then. What I did was writing letters. And don't worry it is quite safe to send it. You just need to send it through his unit. As I know his juniors and other army friends as well I could easily send him stuff. Find some person and don't worry about the mood swings. They don't have any entertainment there and being on duty 24/7 can be too much at times, because they are normal humans like us. Wish you good luck and remember me in your prayers.
Re: Long distance relationship that also in no communication zone
Hey I hope I am not late. Well this sounds like my situation. After Niqah my husband is deployed in Waziristan as well. And it has been really hard for us since then. What I did was writing letters. And don't worry it is quite safe to send it. You just need to send it through his unit. As I know his juniors and other army friends as well I could easily send him stuff. Find some person and don't worry about the mood swings. They don't have any entertainment there and being on duty 24/7 can be too much at times, because they are normal humans like us. Wish you good luck and remember me in your prayers.
Thanks Bella123 .
He is doing much better now and will definitely see how can I send him the letters . He is back to his usual self . Thank God .
