I dont know why you are acting out so much RV. I am just quoting hadith. If you have a problem with them, I'm not the one you need to complain to/about.
A wife is akin to a bakri....then. An argument takes place, she's unhappy......but that's okay....she can splay out her legs cuz it just doesn't matter....sex has NOTHING to do with an emotional connection.....it's purely physical.........sure if she's not into it, it increases the chances of physical discomfort....may even hurt her spiritually..........but that's a-okay.......cuz marriage is a one-sided affair and she's a friggin bakri.
Since I am quoting wife’s conjugal duties, I am obviously applying them in a situation where the husband is also following the rules set down for him by Islam with regards to this manner.
And the husband is supposed to approach his wife with kindness
**“Among His signs is the fact that he has created spouses from among yourselves, so that you may find tranquillity with them; and he has put love and mercy between you. In that are signs for people who reflect.”
****[Qur’an 30:21]
**and again:
**“They (wives) are garments for you, while you are garments for them.”
****[Qur’an 2:187]
**“Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike a thing while Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.”
****[Qur’an 4:19]
To each their own interpretation of Islam and their duties. **Technically there should never be an argument, the wife is supposed to give in. **After all, there is a hadith proclaiming that if ever you were to bow down to anyone other than Allah, then it should be the husband because of the greatness of his rights over you.
Both partners have their own rights, don't know why you're making it so one-sided.. (if it was as you've described women wouldn't even have the right to ever divorce)..
The way you're quoting things is very misleading.. there are many other hadiths that describe how a wife should be treated, her rights and what she is also entitled to and** it's not correct at all to imply she should always give in..**
Edit Just seen your new post above mine.. was referring to what you had written before that..
Marital rape. Sara, sometimes I wonder where you get these ideas from. There is severe lack of comprehension on your side when you read my posts because never do I mentioned marital rape nor do I to my knowledge paint marriage as a life of misery. Marriage is a beautiful and sacred bond IMO, and anyone who believes so personally will not color what I say like this. The only ones who will read negatively into what I have posted thus far are possibly those who fear marriage or are unhappy in their own.
Its absolutely peachy when "educated" "women" advocate marital rape and paint marriage as a life of misery.
why the hate against lasagna huh? what did lasgagna ever do to u huh huh huh huh.
bechara lasagna.
Marriage is about mutual love, respect and understanding and certainly not a misery or just 'duty', 'obligation' and submission for a woman only.
If there are hadiths regarding the rights of men over their wives, so are lots of hadiths emphasising on women's rights. Just painting one side of the picture isnt the answer.
The prophet SAWS advised that a husband should approach his wife with affection/tenderness when he desires sex and not like an animal. If one behaves in a way that does not show respect/consideration......then they are not living up to their lofty sajda-equivalent status. But you know what....never mind. The rights of one person seem to be more important than another. I guess paradise will be further out of reach for women who can't always manage to quash their less than willing feelings and numb their souls.
Deeba, this will be my last reply to you in this series:
To clarify again, I quote a wife's duties while taking into account that the husband is behaving in an islamic manner as well. If he is, the wife should have no argument. TLK mentioned wife's refusal and angels cursing her till morning and I clarified that by adding the hadith to which he was referring. So I was put in the position of speaking of a wife's duty to the husband and bound to defend that stance.
In no manner do I believe that the husband is exempt of his duties towards his wife either.
And a husband has a lot of duties towards his wife, in leiu of which he has rights over her, because ideally if he fulfills all those duties, the wife should be beholden to him most of all after Allah.
Both partners have their own rights, don't know why you're making it so one-sided.. (if it was as you've described women wouldn't even have the right to ever divorce)..
The way you're quoting things is very misleading.. there are many other hadiths that describe how a wife should be treated, her rights and what she is also entitled to and** it's not correct at all to imply she should always give in..**
Edit Just seen your new post above mine.. was referring to what you had written before that..
The prophet SAWS advised that a husband should approach his wife with affection/tenderness when he desires sex and not like an animal. If one behaves in a way that does not show respect/consideration......then they are not living up to their lofty sajda-equivalent status. But you know what....never mind. The rights of one person seem to be more important than another. I guess paradise will be further out of reach for women who can't always manage to quash their less than willing feelings and numb their souls.
And where, pray tell did I say that the husband should approach her like an animal?
I do believe you go out of your way to misread what I post.
And where, pray tell did I say that the husband should approach her like an animal?
I do believe you go out of your way to misread what I post.
WHAT........pray tell gave you the idea that I had even directed my post at you? I'm speaking in a general way. I did refer to the darjah point that you made in my post. It's a two way street. If one has a honorable position...then they need to behave in a way that is in accordance with it.
WHAT........pray tell gave you the idea that I had even directed my post at you? **I'm speaking in a general way. I did refer to the darjah point that you made in my post. It's a two way street. **If one has a honorable position...then they need to behave in a way that is in accordance with it.
Agreed that husbands need to live upto their honorable positions.
^ I did not claim that the husband should force himself on her.
Valid reasons such as illness I can understand.** Emotionally drained? Fearing physical harm? Some women take undue advantage of these two random reasons. What possible physical harm is there in the act? Unless she is pregnant and the act might cause harm to the pregnancy, and there are ways around that too**, what other physical harm is she fearing?
To each their own interpretation of Islam and their duties. **Technically there should never be an argument, the wife is supposed to give in. **After all, there is a hadith proclaiming that if ever you were to bow down to anyone other than Allah, then it should be the husband because of the greatness of his rights over you.
This is just a ridiculous example.
**
"closure". Such a western concept.
**
If a husband calls, you are supposed to answer. It's very clear cut.
I never realized marriage is supposed to be so miserable.
Demesne why do your posts always make me nauseous?
Marital rape. Sara, sometimes I wonder where you get these ideas from. There is severe lack of comprehension on your side when you read my posts because never do I mentioned marital rape nor do I to my knowledge paint marriage as a life of misery. Marriage is a beautiful and sacred bond IMO, and anyone who believes so personally will not color what I say like this. The only ones who will read negatively into what I have posted thus far are possibly those who fear marriage or are unhappy in their own.
What else do you call it when you make it seem like a wife has absolutely NO choice but to submit to her husband, where even pregnancy doesn't exempt her from having to please him sexually? Where making ti seem like she's the cause of every argument?
You may not call that marital rape, but none of that ^ sounds like it has any place in a loving and happy marriage.
