well i think my MIL will be pretty nice, based on my 5 min interaction with her. she doesn't seem particularly 'nasty' or 'weird'. But the thing is all the conflicts I listed above can still occur because of differing expectations of what is right. For example, if I think it is totally wrong for my kid to have a TV in the room, and my MIL thinks i am being totally cruel by depriving her of hannah montana, then who is right? You know what I mean?? If my husband agrees with me, his mom might feel like he is putting her down. And if he agrees with her, i am going to be annoyed. NOT because it's his mom, but because I think I'm right! So...I think the difficulty lies in the fact that it is much easier to compromise between two people, rather than three. I say three, instead of four because I have never heard of anyone having FIL issues. Usually the FIL retreats into his own world:biggthumb Prob the most important thing is that the husband needs to be a firm type of personality-he should not be easily manipulated by either wife or mother. Also people need to talk! For example, husband should tell his wife if there are any expectations for her BEFORE marriage because it is unfair to put her in a situation she doesn't want. And the most important thing is both sides should be forgiving. I mean I totally look over the fact that my mom has called me 'nakummi', 'julli', 'bewaqoof', etc. it's not something that haunts me everyday...but if my MIL called me that...shytt i KNOW i would remember that!! So before getting mad at someone, think, would i be mad if my mom had said this? if not, forgive and forget :)