Re: Living together before marriage.
I would be so darn uncomfortable living with a male who is not my mehram...but that's just me...I think it's years of being in a segregated school and not being around men in general. But it's also a preference. I would like to be with my husband after my marriage bc i feel thats what makes it all more special. I wouldnt wana ruin that feeling for myself living with him before marriage. It is totally upto people who are involved.
Re: Living together before marriage.
i was completely against the idea of anyone living with their significant other before marriage....until i got married. now that im in divorce proceedings, i kinda wish i had that option, maybe i would have had the chance to run before i walked into a doomed marriage with a nutjob!
Re: Living together before marriage.
its interesting to see women ask the question "what if there is cohabitation before marriage and it doesnt work out?"
Its like they see the sex and intimacy part as a price they're paying...like an investment. its like they think sex should rationed and dispensed strategically to men in order to get a commitment for them...in order to keep them interested. hence "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for FREE" . so there is an effin PRICE afterall, eh ?
Re: Living together before marriage.
you are part of the 1% of pakistani population that is considered the elite class. which happens to be very liberal in these kind of cases, so it's no surprise that you know 4-5 others who do the same. it's totally wrong though. never considered it and i know majority of pakistanis will never consider it because that's not the environment they were brought up in. but i wouldn't say that for gupshup, they do not represent the majority of pakistanis.
Re: Living together before marriage.
i was completely against the idea of anyone living with their significant other before marriage....until i got married. now that im in divorce proceedings, i kinda wish i had that option, maybe i would have had the chance to run before i walked into a doomed marriage with a nutjob!
It's surprising how many couples (desi & non-desi) I know who feel this way (and this feeling isn't isolated to women....I know several men who feel this way).
I met a girl through a friend of mine about 2 weeks ago. The girl was visiting her friend (who's also my friend) for the weekend. Here's her story: arranged marriage.....both people born/raised in U.S. Obviously she never lived with him until the marriage. Soon after marriage....she noticed his odd behavior/mood swings. A few months into the marriage...she discovered that he's bi-polar. His family was fully aware of it...they just hid it. 3 DAYS before their 1st anniversary...he committed suicide. She came home from work and discovered his body in their bedroom. She's 27.
Re: Living together before marriage.
^ Oh my god thats so sad :(
Re: Living together before marriage.
Yea it is. This happened like 7 months ago. She has already sold the house and wants to move to a different state and “start fresh”…which is totally understandable given her situation. She was in town interviewing for jobs. Highly educated…gorgeous sweet girl. When we were all “hanging out”…another couple in the group brought up the topic of them wanting to live together…and during that conversation…the widow girl made a comment similar to what ChocoholicsAnonymous](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/members/chocoholicsanonymous.html) wrote. Heinsight is always 20/20…
Re: Living together before marriage.
With nikkah you're in every way allowed to, its a cultural thing that they cant.
living together after nikkah without rukhsati is not encouraged in our culture.
OP, I never heard any such case which you mentioned in your post.
Re: Living together before marriage.
No i wouldn't in any case........ (even if my parents permitted me)
There would be no difference in life before and after marriage if we started living together before marriage.
I love your avatar, its so cute!!!
Re: Living together before marriage.
To save money..
I wouldn’t really class it as ‘living together’ tho.. I know a lot of desi students who do this (yet usually not with desis of the opp sex)..
Re: Living together before marriage.
Uff, there are so many misconceptions in this thread, I’m not even going to bother. But I totally agree with Paheli and ChocoholicsAnonymous, stuff like that does happen. Of course that doesn’t mean you HAVE to live with them in order to figure out whether it works out or not.
And Uzair, I too was thrown off by the whole “why buy the cow when you can get the milk for FREE” thing. Pathetic. 