do you regret any of it? basically youhave been away from your parents every since you grew up....
since people enjoy it this way: they work all day and then party and drink. i have work to do all day but i dont party, only drink :D jkjkjkjk. maybe not. ok jk.
I don't have any regrets. I'm extremely close to my parents and sister even after having lived away from them for so long. It's hard for me say how things would have been if I had been living with them, but what I miss the most now is not being able to show up for every occasion and event, in times of sorrow and pain, or just when I feel like. I have to plan. I just wish I didn't live SO far away.
Now when I do visit, I spend quality time with them all, sit around and chat up a storm, go on walks with my father and catch up with him, follow my mom around the house and catch up with her, go on lunch dates with my sister and catch up with her, or just sit in the family room and enjoy each other's company. I guess you just have to figure out how to make the best of what you got.
I don't have any regrets. I'm extremely close to my parents and sister even after having lived away from them for so long. It's hard for me say how things would have been if I had been living with them, but what I miss the most now is not being able to show up for every occasion and event, in times of sorrow and pain, or just when I feel like. I have to plan. I just wish I didn't live SO far away.
Now when I do visit, I spend quality time with them all, sit around and chat up a storm, go on walks with my father and catch up with him, follow my mom around the house and catch up with her, go on lunch dates with my sister and catch up with her, or just sit in the family room and enjoy each other's company. I guess you just have to figure out how to make the best of what you got.
true
Salam
How about getting married and having kids of your own ... This will help
Philo, this is a tough one, there's a fine balance between being on your own and being with family all the time. On the one hand, leaving family and living on your own helps you grow as an individual, teaches you how to make important decisions, makes you your own person. You learn to do important day to day things by yourself. If you have the personality for it, you can make some real good life long friends, become who you were meant to be. The hard part is being away from family but being away from family doesn't necessarily mean being alone.
On the other hand if you stay with family, well, you are with people who you can count on (usually), who love you unconditionally (usually), and who have your best interests at heart. The bad part about never leaving family is that you end up like so many mama's boys and girls who can't do their own laundry, can't fend for themselves, hell, I've met grown adults who don't know how to balance their bank account and be responsible financially.
I left home when I was 16, as a result, I am EXTREMELY independent and do EVERYTHING for myself, to this day, being married 14 years, I do my own laundry, make my own coffee/breakfast, clean up my own messes. I DO feel that I missed out on some extra family time and while I would never admit it to her, sometimes I just want to be around my ammi :(
It seems that what you truly seem to be debating is whether or not move away for a better job opportunity. In which case it would make the most sense to try as hard as you can find one near your family or within 1-2 states if you really want to be around them. Because it comes down to how often you want to see them, but youth is also a great time to explore where you live and not strap yourself down to the same zipcode out of fear/comfort. You'll do whatever you most prioritize.
but I think once you get settled into your own lifestyle it gets easier…and you just have to suck it up sometimes because it might be better for the future, when you’re like in your 40s…don’t wanna have the regret that i wanted to be in my mommys lap so I didnt go after something and now im still struggling…etc.
and honestly if your family misses you enough theyll keep in touch too and if they aren’t bothered and it’s a one-sided thing then staying close won’t help either.
i agree, i think it’s imp to be the best you can be. I think i’ll just stil get to see them like once a month and that is better than what many people who posted in this thread have done and they still seem to be happy!
i even know of married people nowadays where one person is in one state and the other is in another because of their different goals, etc..
I think what i was/am fearing most is like losing a connection with them and just getting isolated while theyre all busy having babies. getting married, meeting family here.
ill always need my mommmy haha