Let&#39;s right an online novel in Roman Urdu. I&#39;ll start.

786

Ala’s subh ka waqt hai. Aftaab ki zia-posh kirnein aflaak ki sair kartee huweeN seedHee taptee huwee zameen par bars rehee hain jaisay koi nooraani baarish ho rahi ho…

[This message has been edited by Asif (edited January 18, 2001).]

ZZ · January 19, 2001, 12:49am

I donno how good is Roman's Urdu. But i believe it is good enough that I wont understand it.

one sentence at a time is a too strong condition for hayaa. the minimun she can come up at any time is some 8-10 paragraphs..

ChannMahi · January 19, 2001, 1:17am

…jaisay koi nooraani baarish ho rahi ho…garmi se tou aise lagta tha jaise main Saudi Arab mein pahunch gaya hooN lekin yooN hi mujhe sheesham ke darakhat dikhai diye mujhe yakeen ho gaya ke BaghbanPura nazdeeq hi hai. Baghbanpura meri khala ke putter Rehmat Ali ka ghaoN hai aur main aaj pooray dass saal Amreeka mein rehne ke baad apne bhai ko milne aa raha hooN. Baghbanpura se bachpan ki bahut yaadeiN juRhi hui haiN…

ps: yaar sorry kisi tarah se istory lahore le kar jaani thi na

NYAhmadiX · January 19, 2001, 4:38pm

Baghbanpura se bachpan ki bahut yaadeiN juRhi hui haiN..........

Bachpan to guzr geya awara-gardee maiN, laykin jo Jawani ki YaadeiN haiN, wo buht tung kartee haiN. Un YaadooN ney jism ko is tur-hah zakhm-aalood kar diya kay jaisey koi foujee mahaz-e-jang say louta ho.

Asif · January 19, 2001, 5:09pm

Inhii yaadon ne tau dair-e-aghyaar ki sar-zameen mein bhi na mera peecha choRa aur aakhir kaar mujhe sakoon-e-qalb kii khaatir aur puraani yaadon ko sapurd-e-khaak karne ki koshish keliye do-baare Baghbaanpura mein aamadii par majboor kardiya, so hum aagaye.

next.

[This message has been edited by Asif (edited January 20, 2001).]

Dopey · January 20, 2001, 12:55am

Main Baghbanpura lout kur ja tou ja rha houn, lekin kya aub bhi wahan lehlahatay keht houn gey?..Kya goun ki naehr mai aub bhi selaab mai tugyani aati hou gi?..Kya goun ki galiyaan aub bhi kutchi houn gi?..Kya paani me bheeg kur aub bhi mutti ki mehuk waisi hou gi?..Kya geeli mutti mai buchpun mai hum sub nay jou poun kay nichaan baney thay, kya aub bhi wahan houn gey?..Kya goun kay bhooroun kay cheroun pay aub bhi wou shfkut aur masoomiyut, ghuriyoun say ghalukti hou gi?.. Kya bachpun kay saathioun ki aankhoun mai aub bhi meray liyay mohubat ki kirnain houn gi?..Kya wou gaoun aub bhi mera apna houga?

Consider “Kya” one sentence.

Clementine · January 22, 2001, 10:48am

Kya woh gaon ab bhi mera ho ga?......

Main inhi sochon main sir-shar apnay baghan pura barh raha tha. Idhar udhar dekh raha tha keh shayad mujhay koi apna, jana-pehchana, sanasha chehra mil jaye, magar whan ki rail pail dekh kar mujhay ehsas hooa keh yeh Lahore, mera Lahore nahien raha. main phir bhi apnay baghan poora ko dekhnay kay lieye betab tha. Main ne aik tanga roka aur us ko apnay ghar ka rasta bataya...

Most of us will never do great things,but we can do small things in a great way.

Akif · January 22, 2001, 12:58pm

Taangey waley ney merey motay chashmay ko dekh kar mujhey forun pehchaan liya...'Roshan! tu walayat sey kab wapis aya?' itney saalon kay waqfey ki waja sey mein tangey waley ko pehchaan nahi paya aur sawaliya ankhon sey uss ki taraf dekha. Iss par taangey waley ney halki si muskurahat apney chehrey par charhayee, aur bola."Roshan puttar, mein deemay ka piyo hoon". Deemay ka naam suntey hi meri ankhein khul gayeen. Nadeem, jissey poora Baghbaanpura deema kehta tha, merey bachpan ka yaar tha. Mein ney forum tangey waley ko dubara salam kiya, aur uss sey deemay kay baarey mein poocha "puttar, deema tu terey jaaney kay 1 saal baad khud dubai chala gaya tha.....ab har maheenay wahan sey draft kalhta hai 5 hazaar ka" yeh sun kar meri jan mein jan ai, kyoon kay bachpan mein mein ney deemay sey 20 rupay udhaar liye thay, jo kay mujhey dar tha woh wapis maangey ga. lekin shukar hai woh dubai mein hai."aaj kal deema chuttion pey ghar aya huwa hai" tangey waley ney kaha. Mera moon yeh sun kar yuk dum........

Asif · January 22, 2001, 9:16pm

Pungay…you are RIGHT about RIGHT. It should have been WRITE. Thanks for putting me RIGHT, right. Now it’s alRIGHT but please dont make this into a RITE as then I’ll have to WRITE again. RIGHT?

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/hehe.gif

…maayoos sa ho gya goya mujhe kissi purani yaad ne ghair liya ho jo ke mujhe napasand thee. Choonke main Deemay se milna nahin chahata tha main ne dafa’tan kaheen aur jaanay ka iradah karliya jab tak ke Deemay ki waapas dubai-raftee ki khabr mujhe tak nahin puanchtee thi. “Aap..mujhe kissi achchay se hotel ki taraf lai jaayein” main ne aahista se kaha, “itnii dair kay baad aaya hoon na tau main zara Lahore kii galiyon aur khaabaanoN ki sair karna chahata hooN aik do roz o shab keliye. phir baghbaan pura chaloon ga..” Taangay waala mujhe khairat ki nazar se daikhne laga jaisay main ne koi anhonee sii baat keh dee ho..

hayaa · January 23, 2001, 6:00pm

Taangay waala mujhe hairat ki nazar se daikhne laga jaisay main ne koi anhonee sii baat keh dee ho..

Roshan putt, tu vilayt ja ker bhalay hi hamay bhool gaya ho, per jis nanhi si jaan ko apnay haathon say khila ker pervaan cherrhaaya, jissay mailon maiN apnay kandhon per uttha uthaa ghumaaya, jo jab 6 saal ki umr mai gaamay ki majj say gir parra thaa to mai 7 meel apnay kandhay per utha ker daacter kay paas lay ker bhaaga tha, kiya jis roshu ko mainay kabhi apnay deemay say kamm nahin jaana, uss ko mai bhool sakta hoon?? yeh keh ker deemay kay piyo nai apni dhotti say apni aankhain poonch daaleen aur kaha..jab tak mai zinda hoon tu kissi hottal wottal ka naam tak nahin lo gay! chall mairay saath ghar chal aur phir tairi Maa to tujhay daikhnay ko taras gaee hay…

aur soch to, deema tujhay daikh ker kitna khush ho ga.. (

)

ChannMahi · January 23, 2001, 6:52pm

Maine Chachay Mehardin ki baat sun kar bahut sharm mehsoos ki aur chup chaap tangay mein baith gaya. Ussne tangay ko railway station se nikaala aur Baghbanpuray ki taaf le chala....

ps:we need someone here to descibe how things alng the road have changed in last 10 years. Roman? NYAhmadi????

[This message has been edited by ChannMahi (edited January 23, 2001).]

Akif · January 23, 2001, 7:57pm

chacha mehardin apni 19 saal ki ghori ko chaabuk sey halkey halkey sehla raha tha, aur ghori kay liye mehez ishara hi kaafi tha......aik ajeeb si mastani chaal thi uss ki. Meenar-e-pakistan apni poori shaan kay saath minto park ki zeenat bana khara tha....baadshahi masjid apney oonchay meenaron kay saath aney janey walon ko apni taraf bula rahi thi.. Baeen taraf phajjay ka hotel nazar aya...kitni yaadein wabasta theen iss hotel kay saath bhi...uss kay saath wali deewar pey anjuman ka aik poster dekhney waley ki ankhon ko kheera kar raha tha. daeen janib aik purana haveli numa ghar tha jis ki aik khirki sey 2 naujawan larkian sarak kay nazarey lay rahi theen. un mein sey aik larki ney apni nazar sey meri nazar ka jawab diya....rano? mein ney apney aap sey poocha. Rani, jissey mohalley mein sub rano kehtey thay, bachpan mein meri sub sey achi dost thi...jab bhi uss ki amman mooli kay parathay banati, to woh merey liye zaroor lati. Lekin ab rano ko iss ghar ki khirki mein dekh kar merey dil mein ajeeb ajeeb khayalat aney lagey.

NaikLarki · January 23, 2001, 8:41pm

agar Akif apni last post meiN "Rano" ko na laata tou meiN kehti...

"abay kiya likh rahe ho tum lo...shahnaama-e-islam....haiN?"

Kher thank you Akko for bringing in a "wajood-e-zan"....ke wajood-e-zan se hei tasveer-e-kaainaat meiN rang:)
bewaqoofo yeh naval pat jaye ga market meiN
is meiN thoRa rang daalo....thoRa masala...thoRi hirri mirch...thoRi laal mirch...aur thoRa namak.....:)

wot the heck...lemme give story a new turn...

Rano ke chehray per aaj bi assaRh ki pehli baarish jesi nammi thi...wo nammi jissay dekh ke dil khud'ba'khud narm ho jata hei...aur yooN lagta hei jesay jab yea nammi iss meiN rachay gi tou iss meiN se pyaar ki khethi uggay gi.....

Rano ko uss khiRki meiN dekh ke mujhay lagga jesay yea khethi kisi aur ke khet meiN ugg aai ho....jesay saara sulla koi aur chug ke le gya ho.........

awwwwwwww rano yea tu ne kiya kia.....kiya tu bhool gayee..."Barsaat ki wo raat....."
mujhay tou zindagi bhar na bhoolay gi ...haaye wo ik raat.....*

hahahaha
ok guys....have fun...meiN paj lavaaN ithooN:)

hayaa · January 23, 2001, 8:53pm

Naik

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/hehe.gif

seems like Akif is writing an Aap-beeti

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/eek.gif

mujhay tou zindagi bhar na bhoolay gi …haaye wo ik raat…

MaiN apni sochon ki lehron mai hichkolay lay raha tha keh chacha mehardin ki awaaz nay mujhay yaadon kay girdaab say baahir khainch nikala… putt…tairi taak jhaank ki aadat nahin gaee? aur kiya aaj bhi marasi banenay ka shoq hay? mai yeh sun ker shirmindagi say hans diya. o naee chaacha jee, woh mujhay apni rano yaad aa gaee thi, soch raha tha ab to uss ka biyaah ho chuka ho ga…ab mujhay mooli kay paraathay kon khilaya karay ga. chachay meherdin nay aik hankaara bhara aur kehnay laga.. haan woh apni rano… uss ka to…

ChannMahi · January 23, 2001, 9:27pm

Rano? nai nai maine Nimmo soch rakhi thi Baghbanpuray mein…lekin aap kambakhtoN ne humaray Roshie ko rasaty mein hi lutt liya

khair abh bhi kuchh nai bigRha…Nimmo mein le ayeiNge aur Rano ko bhi rehnay do..aawwwww kiya Triangle bannegi

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/hehe.gif

B-B-G · January 23, 2001, 11:00pm

Naiko

Chan ji aap apni Nimmo ko uss waqt istemaal karain jab Roshan khudkashi karnay jaa raha hou or Nimmo ussay rok lay

waisay bhabhi ji ko Nimmo tou nahi kahtay peayr say

ok topic ki terf aeyn

uss ko tou bas uss ki soutaili maa nay Baalay budmaash k agay baich deya shadee k naam pay or uss nay issko yaha laa bithaya,baychari ki qismat ,yay kahtay hoeay chachay mahurdin nay apnay tangay ki raftaar taiz or apnay gher ki tarf tangay kaa moo moura,or main apnay kheaylou ki dunia main doubara gum hou gia k kaisay hum dounou nay…

Asif · January 23, 2001, 11:04pm

Naik …

Chann ji–not sure if your last post was part of the novel or not…so i’ll ignore it

ama ba’ad..

…chachay meherdin nay aik hankaara bhara aur kehnay laga.. haan woh apni rano… uss ka to…Khuda jaanay kya huwa puttar. Haaye meray Malik! Yeh kehte kehte chachay meherdin ki aankhein aansooyon se bhar aayein aur us ne apnay aastenoN se apni aankhein poonch dein. Poonch kar Rani di ranjeedah daastaan sunane laga..“Puttar, kya bataoN tujhe. Kitna bura din tha woh..tumhaare valaayat jaanay se chand roz hi baad..tujhe yaad hai hai na Chacha Fazal Deen, Allah bakhshay, jo ke Rani ka badnaseeb baap tha? Yaad hai uss ne zameen kay mmuqadamay mein Chaudhry Bahadur Khan kay khilaaf gawayee dee thi? Bas tujhe to patta hi hai ke yeh waderay log kitne zalim hote hain puttar..Uss zalim ne bari hone kay baad apne gonDon se Rani bitiya ko uThwaa liya tha.. woh din aur aaj ka din. Kayee saal beet gaye hain beta..par uska koi patta nahin lagta. Hum ne bahut puls (police) mein darkhwaastein bhi deeN, aur aas paas ka saara ilaaka bhi jhaanch liya lekin uska to koi naam o nishaan na mila. Uski maan to bechaari paagal hi hogayee hai. Aur baap logoN kay ta’anay sun na sakka aur aakhir khud-kushee karlee. haye! Allah usse bakhsh day.ameen…”
“Par chacha…woh larki abhi.. Rani…” main ne sawaal kiya liya shiddat-e-jazbaat se meray ilfaaz gallay mein hi aTak rahe thay. Mere dil mein is afsurdah daastaan se ajeeb kaifiyyat ho rahi thi. Mujhe Rani ki woh shokh nazrein yaad aa rahi thieN..aur uski hansee-e-maansind-e-qo’il..uska mujhe hamesh kuweiN par milna aur kehna keh tum jab valayat se aaogay to mujhe biya kar lay jaana. Mera jigar-e-sozaN jal raha tha, aur in khyaalat kay saath sath mere ashk bhi behnay lagay..main kitnay khoobsurat iraadoN kay saath waapas loTaa tha aur ab kya sun raha tha! Haaye gardish-e-taqdeer! Meri pur-milaah haalat ko dekh kar chacha se bardaasht na huwa aur uss ne mujhe apne seenay se lagaa liya..“Beta. Main jaanta hooN ke woh teri maang thi bachpan ki…ab woh…” “Chacha woh abhi tau dekhi hai!” main ne nihaayat hi dard-bhare awaaz main arz kiya.." “Beta ab woh..tumhaare laaiq nahin rahi..” “Kya matlab?!” iss jumlay ne yekdum mujhe saakit hone pe majboor kardiya.
Aur main ne Chacha ko poora waqia byaan karne par majboor kiya. Pehle tau woh nahin maane lekin jab main ne Data Sahib ka waasta diya to phir aahista aahista pur-hawl awaaz main bataanay lagay. “Beta, woh aghwaa kar lee gayee thi. Kayee saaloN se hum ne socha ke bechaarii mar gayee hai. Maan jaisay pehle bataaya hai paagal ho gaye; baap ne khud-kushee kar lee. Is ki asal wajjah yeh hai ke chand saal pehle aik khabr phailne lagee ke Heera Mandi main se aik nayee tawaif filmoN mein aa rahi hai..jiska naam Rani Begum bataate the. Aik daffa shooting ho rahi thay aur gaoN kay kuchh larkay gaye the…Deema bhi unmein se tha…us ne kya dekha ke yeh Rani Begum humaari Rano hai…bas yeh bay-izzati ki khabr uska baap na bardasht kar sakka aur apne aap ko goli se uRaa diya…”
(sorry BBG I must have been typing as you posted it; still your twist and mine kinda matches right..

)

[This message has been edited by Asif (edited January 23, 2001).]

B-B-G · January 23, 2001, 11:17pm

Khuda ki panah Asif Allah tumhay poochay tum nay Rano k saath jou salook kia mairi line 3 daffa disc hoee yay likhtay likhtay werna tum sahi jaa rahay thay khair agay ki kahani tumhari post hi say shuroo hou gi,so who is next Rano ka hasher darust karnay k leay koee likho bohut dukhi ho gaee kahani

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/mad.gif

NaikLarki · January 24, 2001, 3:50am

:buht hi zayada ghussay wala icon:

band karo yea ravaas paTaas…meiN ne masala daalne ko kaha tha tum logooN ne rona peeTna macha diya…aur wo bi kis ke expense per…Aurat ke…huh…!!

mazaak samajh rakha hei tum logooN ne…her waqt aurat ko mazloom saabut kerne per jutay rehtay ho tum log…and u girls…yea mard kehtay heiN aurat mazloom hei tou tum forun se m,azloomiyut ki chadar ooRh leti hoo…huh huh huh…stop this nonsense…

"Rano koi aghwa waghwa nahiN hoi thi…Apni khusi se apne yaar ke saath gayee thi…aur apni khushi se filmooN meiN kaam ker rahi hei …kiyooN its FUN…

Aur gaooN ke be’ghairut chaudriyooN ne gannay ke khet meiN Roshan ki izzat din dehaRay loot li thi (Tha ker ke…roshan shurmandgi ke maaray valayut chala gya…uss ke baap ne sadme se khudkashi ker li…aur roshan ki maaN aur behn apne ghar meiN khush baash heiN…balke roshan ki maa ne tou dosri shaadi bi ker li hei…apni khushi se… unhi beghairut chuderiyooN meiN se eik se…bava pesa hei unn ke paas…ab roshan bechara …10 saal baad lauTa hei des…

lo ji ab kahani aagay baRhao…huh!

Akif · January 24, 2001, 4:43am

"Rano koi aghwa waghwa nahiN hoi thi…Apni khusi se apne yaar ke saath gayee thi…aur apni khushi se filmooN meiN kaam ker rahi hei …kiyooN its FUN…:)<<

and who said Rano was working in films