..so everyone slapped that little boy....I felt soo bad.....But when everyone was beating him....
:(
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
Also, reserve a table for the actual bride's family (on the Walima day). It is the height of rudeness to have no where for the immediate family to sit.
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
oh poor poor naiive unmarried girls. as desis we will never learn from others mistakes. its just not in our genes. dont expect a problem free wedding. i tried and failed miserably. u just have no power over some ppl and things.
but ya… most imp of issues have already been stated. i believe the gandh starts when uninvited ppl end up coming and mess up the ppl count.
at my sil’s wedding, not only did uninvited ppl drop by, but ppl actually refused to sit where they were told to cuz they wantd to sit with their buddies.. so even though more seats were added, half the hall was empty and the other half jam packed with ppl crawling over eah other.
a very abnormal thing happened at my barat.. an aunty kept harassing the photographer to take single pics of her daughter for rishta purposes.. my mom asked her politely that the photographer was missing out on rasms and she goes.. but my daughter is looking so pretty today.. meine socha ek teer se do shikar kerlu.. larki tayar hai..piktur kich walu.. rishtay wali ke liye..
reserved tables, name tags on tables, telling moms to keep kids calm and away from teh stage, mad food rush are things that will never be in style at desi weddings. its just too hard for us curry corner dwellers
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
Just one lesson, that don’t get married. 
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
^ 
I agree with all that has been said… especially about the invited vs. actual turnout and the camera thing… koi haal nahi 
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
I think there are some things that are completely unavoidable like the mad rush for food...UNLESS you go family style and have the dinner served to the tables. That takes care of the long lines and aggressive cutting. I went to a wedding recently and was a victim of this...I only had three people behind me but this auntie still felt the need to elbow her way in before me...SHE DIDNT EVEN ASK!!! How RUDE!!!
For the extras that tag along...SGC made a great suggestion...reserved seats. At my wedding, I spotted so many people that werent invited but I had also paid for and set out 25 extra places/food just in case this happened and it did. I would NEVER show up with extra people at someone's wedding...its rude and unthoughtful!!!
For seating, you usually have an option for round tables: seating of 8 or 10. 8 is perfect, 10 is way too stuffy but desies dont care about that so its usually 10.
Children..............I love them! But its not fair to the couple who work so hard to make their day perfect to have it ruined by some teeny tiny monsters that you even feel bad scolding! I know their kids but their YOUR kids so control them please!
This didnt happen the day of the wedding but it did happen on one of the functions at home...people stuffing garbage (paper plates, cups, spoons, napkis) in the most ridiculous places! In corners, under tables, under sofas, etc...you name it!
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
The most recent valima i went to was AMAZINGLY organised and nothing went wrong in it at all (apart from a very moody bride, for no apparent reason)
At food time, food was served to us on the table which sorted out the food rush.
In terms of people arriving the wedding card was very blunt.
It said Mr and Mrs X plus children.
and at the bottom it said. 'We would be gratreful if there are no additional guests as the hall has a limited capacity. Thankyou'
Only one family bought their dadi visiting from pakistan which was fair enough.
There was a bouncy castle outside for the kids which was great.
But the funniest thing i have ever seen is my cousins valima in Karachi
As soon as the sound of lids lifting of the dishes there was actually full on sprinting and pushing...so wierd.
ANd then i went up to get kulfi for my table so me and 6 other cousins and i put them all on one plate, i was standing waiting to get through back to my table and then people started taking kulfi from my plate and putting it in their own plate until nothing was left!
WHAT THE HELL! i find it very funny though.
Oh and also...my other cousin was trying to walk down the red carpet about 2 years ago and them some kid came and pushed her and later noticed a ring was missing :(
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
This thread is so funny!
I have to agree with everyones points here. I remeber once i attended a wedding and i sat at the table with mom and younger sisters. It was time for dinner and mom said to my sisters and I to get food first. So i put my purse on my seat and told Mom to keep an eye on the seat so no one take it. I came back with plate in my hand and i see some unknown aunty sitting on my chair on my purse!! Mom was talking with some other aunty so she didnt notice 
I dont think any desi wedding can come aout Perfectly perfect 
The most recent valima i went to was AMAZINGLY organised and nothing went wrong in it at all (apart from a very moody bride, for no apparent reason)
At food time, food was served to us on the table which sorted out the food rush.
In terms of people arriving the wedding card was very blunt.
It said Mr and Mrs X plus children.
and at the bottom it said. 'We would be gratreful if there are no additional guests as the hall has a limited capacity. Thankyou'
Only one family bought their dadi visiting from pakistan which was fair enough.
There was a bouncy castle outside for the kids which was great.
But the funniest thing i have ever seen is my cousins valima in Karachi
As soon as the sound of lids lifting of the dishes there was actually full on sprinting and pushing...so wierd.
ANd then i went up to get kulfi for my table so me and 6 other cousins and i put them all on one plate, i was standing waiting to get through back to my table and then people started taking kulfi from my plate and putting it in their own plate until nothing was left!
WHAT THE HELL! i find it very funny though.
Oh and also...my other cousin was trying to walk down the red carpet about 2 years ago and them some kid came and pushed her and later noticed a ring was missing :(
lol, omg!!!!!!!!!!
can you tell me how the dinner served at table thing worked out? sgc gave me the idea to do plated dinners (she's an awesome planner) and i LOVE the idea but when i brought it up to my sister, she asked me if that's something that would work with desis? you don't know how much biryani they want or whatever.. so can you please share what they did and how?
since im only inviting family members and very close friends to the wedding to keep it small, im hoping the mad food rush wouldn't occur because they are all quite civilized but still, serving food at the table sounds more classy and good nevertheless.
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
Certainly the dinner served at the table idea is better than a buffet bcos there is a mad rush, but then there r some ppl who keep the waiters on their toes.
After a recent wedding I think it would be nice for ppl to have individual plates of starters and mains etc, and waiter could go around with serving dishes for topping up biryani and curries etc, but that may be more trouble than its worth.
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
Basically in the valima i went to there was only 250 people so it was pretty small like yours pareezay.
We sat in tables of 10 and there was a special table for bride and groom and the two families.
OK the service was amazing and there was more than enough food.
For starteres, the waiters bought out individual plates of- 2 somosas 2 sikh kebabs and then on table there were trays of chicken tikka and fried prawns and little things of chutney and sauces. The waiters walked around and if any chicken or prawn ran out then they bring more out and refil it…and it was fresh so the waiters must be watching and reporting which tables need more.
OK for main dishes:
The waiters took the starter plates way very efficiently and with no fuss…and then gave us larger plates.
Each table was served with a large plate of biriyani, a large bowl of chicken korma, some noodle type thing, a bhindi dish, and a fish curry and lots of fresh naan and salad and raita
again if anything ran out it was refilled.
for dessert- everyone was again was given individual plates- on it there was a gulab jamun, some kulfi and a mini cheesecake.
It was all delicious and no fuss. The catering service was amazing.
The thing is, i dont know how well it would work in pakistan! would people actually understand the concept? or start moaning/complaining or start walking around when ffood is being served, would children actually sit and eat…
In england (this valima), us, canada, austrailia etc its really normal to have sit down meals at events so everyone is used to it!
The dessert was served in this style
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
^wow, sounds nice.
was there enough room on the tables to accomodate everything? especially with centerpieces, etc..?
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings…
Yes there was! because the centerpeice was incorporated into the karahi stand apart from the biriyani which was on a seperate plate.
something a bit like this ( but in white and pink)
ill see if i can find a better picture! that above is a bit meh.
oh also at this wedding, there was a little box of ambala mithai for everyone to eat whith tea or coffee which i thought was a lovely touch!
i saw a beautiful girl,on my cousin's wedding,wearing a gorgeous dress,holding a plate mounted with biryani,salad and kebabs,eating like she is eating after so many years.though i was so impressed by her dressing and the way she was carrying all that.................
For this upcoming wedding and previous family weddings to beat the whole buffet/musical chair scenario we have decided to have the waiting staff bring out starters on trays, with salad and chutneys. Then when everyone has finished clear up the starters and bring out the mains and so forth. It works really well and is definitely more organised than the buffet scenario.
Normally we seat families together. Each table is reserved for a family or two families at the most. This way those everyone gets a seat and people can be seated comfortably. This also ensures that close family and friends will get the best seats.
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
If I had had my wedding in the US I would have definitely not have a buffet style dinner. Initially we were going with a 7 course meal in khi then we all realized how uncivilized people are in pak. There, I said it! Even if they are civilized in other countries, rest assured people will act barbaric at a wedding in pakistan.
At a recent wedding I went to, the mehndi dinner was planned out like a mission by me, my husband and friends. I asked my husband to stand in line for all of us. When he got to near the food, me and another friend went there so we wouldnt have to stand in line, and I hate stanidng in line with heels. All the while we told another friend to wait at the table to make sure no one takes our seats!! Then after eating, we were all like, lets go check out the desserts. When we left, we left our napkins on the seats and half full glasses on the tbale so people knew that someone was sitting there. Ofcourse that didnt stop the damn aunties that took all 4 seats while we were gone. When we went back we looked at them, they all looked at us and I just gave them a mean look.
As long as you have civilized people at ur wedding, please dont do buffet style. :)
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
^ no offence sumorani but it would really really piss me off if someone just pushed in the line because then the person behind has to wait alot longer then they think.
sorry :(
pareezay u are TOO funny, it is beyond science....but we cannot control the desi population at weddings - i dont know what comes over ppl! another one is ppl dressing up like the bride or groom in there own wedding clothes! i has someone at mine who wore hers from the 1980s!
Re: Lessons you have learnt from other weddings...
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