So I’m the eldest son in the family, and my parents will want me to stay with them after marriage. I love them a lot, but I want to live separately in my own house after marriage. So how do I talk to my parents about this before my marriage (if that ever happens :D)?
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
^ you say this " Dear Parents.....i don't want to live with you after i am married. So what do you suggest about it??"
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
^ you say this " Dear Parents.....i don't want to live with you after i am married. So what do you suggest about it??"
That sounds rude though. They're parents and they've raised you your whole life. I can still be happy without marriage too, so I'm just considering my options. ;)
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Don't worry, even if you make it clear right now when its your own decision, when you get married 018273917231 years from now they'll blame your wife for taking you away :)
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
What you want is one thing, and what your parents may is another. As a matter of fact, however convenient a separate system will be, (and YES it is) obviously there is no way one should annoy or displease their parents. I dont know what your reasons are, for living separately, I dont think you should pre plan or make your mind already about it. Things is future will decide best. I preferred to live with my inlaws because I didnt want my to be children deprived of the love of their grand parents or my inlaws to be deprived of enjoying and loving the kids and be with me bringing them up. I know the joy of being a phupo and I would for sure want my inlaws to be blessed with the same. So maybe there will be things you will have to consider. Parents have their due importance and worth and it should be realized.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Say I'm thinking of living on my own after marriage, but don't worry I wont be too far.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
do NOT say YES to shaadii until they say YES to your SEPARATE LIVING ARRANGEMENT!!! :D
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Let them now you're considering moving close by after marriage...qissa khatam.
But dont marry until these things are cleared up between you guys otherwise they will think you're soft in the head and can be easily manipulated by any woman that walks into your life.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Thanks for the suggestions! I'll wait some years and then see depending on what the situation is. My parents wanted me to get married to my first cousin and I refused, so this is why I had to start thinking about marriage this early even though I'm still in college.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Nice! ;)
Leaving parents and first cousin combination...even though I'm still in college... has a final touch!
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
You said you are the eldest one.....do you have younger brothers??
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
wouldn't your parents also want their privacy and time to themselves, i never saw why it was necessary for all to live in one house.
living 45 min to 1 hr away seems reasonable, that way they have their privacy and can plan their own activities and you and your wifey will have yours. meeting on special occasions. my mom's a mommy in law and my bro is the eldest but even if she respects her DIL a lot and it is one happy family!! she wouldn't want to live with them, it's just that people start to get in each other's way when there isn't that freedom to live on your own.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Turn into a woman. You won't even have to have that discussion with them then.
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
So I'm the eldest son in the family, and my parents will want me to stay with them after marriage. I love them a lot, but I want to live separately in my own house after marriage. So how do I talk to my parents about this before my marriage (if that ever happens :D)?
Just play the song "Sada Chiryaa Tha Chunba aaye" and tell them you are Chirri !!
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Just play the song "Sada Chiryaa Tha Chunba aaye" and tell them you are Chirri !!
That seems to be the best option available
You should tell them that gals leave parents house after marriage, why guys cannot do the same...After all the gal(your wife) is also leaving her parents house(hope so) and you believe in equality...simple!!!
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
inshallah it 'll happen soon but i don’t think you have to leave your parents…plz think abut it again by sitting on chair at night with a bitter cup of tea in your hand..hope it’ll help you to take right descision 
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
good advice…so you did the same before your merriage??? 
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
aur woh chai ka cup bhi khud banaya ho :hinna: more tragic scene
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
I am wondering why you don't want to live with them after marriage in a first place??
There are many other options as well like if you have big house, you can live in a separate portion with your family and near your parents, in this way you can spend time with your parents as well.
If you have made up your mind then start discussing family issues with her like "mom i think guy should live separately after marriage" and by giving example "they could avoid their problems by living separately." etc
Re: Leaving parents after marriage
Why do you want to leave your parents?? I dont get it...What if ur son does the same thing to u in 25 - 30 years...then u'll realize what it feels like...honestly ppl just dont give their parents enough respect n e more...