Ok,just a general question.
I’ve heard about many love stories where a guy leaves the girl or let go of their so-called full of love relationship just because his mom doesn’t approve their relationship and his mom dislikes the girl.The guy leaves the girl saying that if he will marry the girl,his mom will make life really difficult for the girl.So he doesn’t want that to happen to that girl,so that’s why he sacrifices his relationship with that girl,hmmmmm 
Do you think is it right from the guy’s part to do that?What do you think about this?
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
Sure. Mom gave birth to the man....leaving a mom for the girl would be really wrong.
If the girl is right type ..she will convince the mom that she is worth her son.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
How can the girl do that?
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
If a guy can't stand up for himself to marry a girl, he isn't ready to get married- he needs to grow up, decide if she is the best for him and then marry her- mommy will be fine once she sees the grandkids- simple as that!
oh by the way, the same losers come up with the excuse of "I am not settled down yet so can't tell mommy about us" well as a rule of thumb, they shouldn't be considered either!
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
That's what I think that only such a guy who is a loser, who can't stand for himself takes such a step, and his excuse would be that because his mom dislikes the girl,so he doesn't want anything wrong to happen with that girl,no?
Does the mom have a valid reason for disapproving of the girl? Or is she simply rejecting her out of jealousy and insecurity? IF the mom is turning the girl down out of jealousy....then chances are she's not going to be very accepting of ANY girl that her son marries.....even if she were to choose the bahu herself.
The guy needs to understand that there will be ups and downs in a Saas/Bahu relationship. Some days will be better than others. There will be problems in every relationship EVEN in a husband/wife relationship. And if the guy is rejecting **a girl **SIMPLY because he wants to avoid problems that will result between the girl and his mom.........then HE'S NOT READY FOR ANY RELATIONSHIP AT ALL!
Arguments are a part of every relationship. And learning how deal with conflicts is a part of life and a part of being an ADULT.
That's what I think that only such a guy who is a loser, who can't stand for himself takes such a step, and his excuse would be that because his mom dislikes the girl,so he doesn't want anything wrong to happen with that girl,no?
Waterfall....
A guy can use whatever excuse he wants to NOT *marry a girl. It doesn't necessarily have to be the excuse, *"Oh I care about you so much that I don't want my mom to eat you alive. So, darling, I can't marry you. Mujhe maaf kar do."
He can also use the excuse, "I'm not settled in my career yet." Or, "It's not you, it's me. You deserve a better guy."
If a guy GENUINELY loves a girl and if he SINCERELY wants to marry her and BELIEVES that's she's the ONE........nothing will stop him. He will try to find a way of making things work instead of giving up so easily without a fight.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
I can have a wife, Not have a have, or have 4 of them at one time. I will have only one mother and according to a hadeeth, after Allah and his Rasul (PBUH) , next person in terms of respect and love is the mother , then the mother, then the mother and then the father.
So where to women come across thinking they marry you and now we have to be on their side...and thats called MANHOOD?
Shame on a man who takes his wife's side over his mother's - The same mother that bore him.
If any of of you girls marry's a man who does that..then you didn't marry a man at all - you married a loser. And a man that doesnt respect his mother....you expect him to respect you? You got a long way to go before you grow up Gemini.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
Mothers have an honorable and elevated status in Islam. HOWEVER, mothers are still human beings.....and like all other people they are NOT immune to feelings of jealousy and insecurity. If a mom has valid reasons for rejecting a girl, then those reasons should be considered. If the reasons are merely excuses....then mom's intentions are questionable.
A mom is also a daughter-in-law. And one would want their own mom to by her in-laws. There are many angles and sides to a conflict. While Islam requires us to honor our mothers, our religion also emphasizes justice and listening to all sides of a an issue before making a decision.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
PBUH Prophet was also a human being who said what a status the mother is. Before you sit and question a mother's intentions....look at the girl's intentions.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
As said above.........ALL angles need to be considered. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE ONE OR THE OTHER????? What logic is there in listening to one side blindly? Blind obedience is not a virtue. If man has been blessed with intelligence and the ability to reason, he will look at all angles, listen to all viewpoints, and consider the matter/evidence thoroughly before reaching a decision.
If a guy's sister is being abused by her mother-in-law in her marital home.....should the guy think that HIS SISTER is the guilty party? Should the guy automatically think that HIS SISTER is the problem and that her MOTHER-in-Law, who is an elevated mother, is the innocent victim??????? A sensible man considers all sides before pointing a finger.
Even the prophet PBUH apologized for his mistakes if the felt he had wronged anyone. And if he SAWS can make mistakes....then so can one's mother.
As said above.........ALL angles need to be considered. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE ONE OR THE OTHER????? What logic is there in listening to one side blindly? Blind obedience is not a virtue. If man has been blessed with intelligence and the ability to reason, he will look at all angles, listen to all viewpoints, and consider the matter/evidence thoroughly before reaching a decision.
Look at the title of the thread. And read it again. Starts with the word "leaving"...
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
^ Look at the other half of the title, "because of mom." It doesn't matter if the word is leaving or coming. The bottom line is that ALL angles should be considered (the mom's side as well as the girl's side). A sensible individual thinks of all sides of an issue before "LEAVING", "CALLING IT QUITS", "GIVING UP", "REJECTING", "BLINDLY SUBMITTING", "WALKING AWAY".
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
Why do some people have to control others? I am not a mom yet, but I hope I am never that possesive. Why do we treat each other like property? :(
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
^ Why do we treat each other like property? You just answered your own question in your own post. It's because of control. Control freaks. Insecurity. Wanting what is best for your child is good. Fostering independent adult decision making skills in your child is good. Children need a little control because they don't know the difference between wrong and right. When they become adults, the relationship b/w them and parents should naturally change. No place for control in sincere love. Doesn't matter whose doing the controlling (mom, wife, hubby, bro, friend, etc.)
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
No comment was uncalled for - read above in sequence again ....and if you dont know what a mother's respect is....you dont deserve to talk to me. Now quit wasting my time and get a weasel who will leave his mother for you...lol
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
No need to thank. As mentioned earlier, you answered your own question.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
^ Guys, nobody is disrespecting anybody's mother in this thread. It's been blown way out of proportion. Calling someone a Mama's Boy is not an insult to the person's mother......it's basically teasing of the individual himself. And there are WORSE words/labels out there. It's the boy that's being teased, not the Mama.
People have their own opinions. You can agree to disagree without resorting to insults. If one feels that they trust their parents' input more compared to individual choice when it comes to deciding whom to marry..........there is nothing wrong with that. Other people implement a more holistic approach to making such a decision. It's simply a matter of personal preference. Let it go.
Re: Leaving a girl because of mom
[mod]Fayax and aahmed....I have cleaned up this thread. Learn to respect each others views and refrain from the name calling.[/mod]