Language Barrier

Lifestyle Relationships
1

Has anyone had any sort of language barriers with the in-laws and how did you get around them?

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Re: Language Barrier

like you speak english, and they speak other than english?

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Re: Language Barrier

I speak english/urdu and they speak english/kutchi. A lot of the time it's kutchi. I find it a little rude that they speak kutchi in front of me when they know i cant understand it.

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Re: Language Barrier


what's kutchhii? i've heard about this lingo but never actually heard anyone speak it. is it kinda Gujrati?

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Re: Language Barrier

Oh, that sucks! I would be pretty annoyed too especially if they can speak English without a problem. I guess they probably feel more comfortable speaking Kutchi but they should try not to when sitting as a family.

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Re: Language Barrier

It is rude, but you may request them that you want to learn kutchi language. Ask your husband to teach you basic kutchi.

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Language Barrier

I have requested it but they just don't really know how to teach? Husband doesn't either. Like they're just expecting me to pick it up. It's really frustrating when they speak especially so when they can speak English fluently! I guess they do feel comfortable speaking in that language but it's just awkward.

Kutchi is language from sindh. I hate it.

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Re: Language Barrier

I believe it the matter of vocabulary, ask him to use kutchi word in English, so you could understand the meaning of those words by context and rest of the thing should not difficult to you because most of the language spoken in pakistan use same sentence mechanical structure as urdu.

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I speak sense and they speak nonsense..:-) but we have been able to do just fine.

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Re: Language Barrier

I speak Pashto/English/basic urdu. My in-laws speak english/urdu/hindko. At home they speak urdu. When I got married, my urdu was very basic because at home I spoke english or pashto. I dont live with my in-laws (we live in another country) so I didnt have the day to day interaction with them. I also asked my husband to only speak to me in Urdu (I do fully understand it though, so that helped) so I could improve and speak with my mil in urdu. Over the last 1.5 years, my urdu has really improved. It is still not fluent, but better than before.

I know someone who married a punjabi girl, and he actually got cd's that were meant to help him learn punjabi so he could learn the language. I doubt there would be cd's to learn kutchi, but you should ask your husband to help you learn it, by speaking it with you and translating. You should practice everyday, and hopefully pick it up.

When my aunts got married, they moved from Peshawer to Lahore. They did not speak a word of punjabi. Because they were immersed in the language, they picked it up by hearing other people around them and practicing. Now when you hear them speak punjabi, its as if they were born and raised in Lahore.

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Re: Language Barrier

Hmmm. Sit down with your husband and talk about the matter seriously. Tell him that you're not asking his family to stop speaking kutchi...but wish that they would also incorporate a bit of English as that would help you to not only learn a bit Kutchi but it'll help you bond with them. Don't get defensive or make accusations....try telling him that you really want to connect with his family and that you need his help with that. Maybe saying it in this way will motivate him more. Despite the language barrier....there are other ways you can bond with them. For example...try to be involved, help them out with things, kind gestures, etc. Hopefully...your efforts might get them to cooperate more. But talk to your husband about it.

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Re: Language Barrier

It's only a matter of habit. Husband and sil talk to each other n Danish.... They tried not to but couldn't keep up with the fakeness of trying to keep me happy... It's just not them and they can't communicate with each other if they can't talk dansk. They have been doing so from the beginning. They know Urdu well enough but still... We all talk in English otherwise with Urdu thrown in. What they DO do to make it less idiotic for me is summarize what they have just said... If it concerns me...otherwise I don't care.

Kher this was in the beginning... Nowi know dansk well enough so no issues. You will learn their lingo too.

So Let them be... It's not rude ... It's just something really really hard to break away from... I know this cuz I can't communicate with my siblings without talking in English even though our Urdu is great.

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Re: Language Barrier

Don't you think you'll have more complaints about them if you actually understood what they are saying? :P

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Re: Language Barrier

Why not develope a polyglot launguage using words and elements from the two languages and making a new one?

Alternatively start using signs and they will understand you soon enough... I have Cousins in Chitral that speak a strange tribal language simmilar to pashto but much faster and its hard to make sense out of them at times, i can speak pashto but they speak it at 500mph so its always like Huh... what did you say?

I gave up trying to understand the major words and phrases and just learned short words like "okay" etc to be able to give answers and then slowly built up my own mental vocabulary thing is with time you will learn.

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Re: Language Barrier

yah thats one of my concerns thats why I'm learning Urdu (unfortunately veryyy slowly..) before I get married.

I find it rude when my English/Japanese or Japanese/Chinese speaking friends do this in front of people who don't understand.
Its especially rude when they are talking about the person.. in front of them -.-

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Re: Language Barrier

What do they speak with your parents?

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Re: Language Barrier

who..?

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Re: Language Barrier

^Sorry, I meant Cupcake..

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Re: Language Barrier

oh I'm sorry

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Re: Language Barrier

You should consider yourself lucky! :D