Well men are not uncontrollable animals.
Quite an offensive statement Sara516... You should be ashamed of yourself and should really think before you write, especially being a MOD.
Having said that, women has to realize that this is one of the most basic needs of a human being and only spouses can help each other for this. I know this for a fact, women sometimes make this a habit and that's when the problem start.
Don't wanna judge but it seems that the only reason this is even an issue after only 3, 4 years of marriage (unless this question is purely out of curiosity), someone is not being 100% honest when they say "NOT TONIGHT HUNNY, I AM TIRED"...
There are several AHADEES discussing this very topic.
RC
Learn to read and comprehend before foaming at the mouth.