Re: Jahez
This mentality is what perpetuates the wrong in society. Even though its an educated view, has good intentions and makes sense that if you have enough, it’d be good to gift your daughter stuff- it inadvertently places the burden of jahaiz on people with lower socio-economical reasons. We can’t do much about log kia kahengay because this is baseline human mentality- so lets turn it around and change it into- “dekho itna jahaiz mangain gey tou log kia kahein gey” as in- turn this asking for jahaiz into something undesirable.
Personal example- husband and I are both in competitive fields making 6 figures each. I never took ANY jahaiz, not because I couldn’t, but because my parents and parents-in-law both were strongly against it. MIL decorated our apartment and bought every little thing from hubby’s money prior to our nikkah.
Another personal example- good friend of mine had an engagement broken weeks before shadi for this jahaiz issue. Again, both husband-to-be and wife-to-be are in competitive fields and make just as much as we do. But it became more of an ego issue about how much they were receiving. Very sad and tactless. Lets be better than that!