It's "your day"!

[Deeba1234]

Re: It’s “your day”!

@kakee

Well for me the functions I’ve been in that had 300+ people were entrance and graduation ceremonies at school. So its a bit overwhelming you see especially when my guest list would be about 50 people lol. Besides its cultural for desis to have hundreds of people at their wedding to celebrate it and I was thinking well I could have a flower girl(s) and some non-desi food.
I don’t see how thats unfair? When the wedding will be in Pakistan and there will be foreign guests who might not be able to eat Pakistani food. Flower girls and other things aren’t done in my SOs family and I’m definitely sure its because he’s Pakistani.

Also my SO doesn’t really mind he’s open to anything really as long as its not so absurd. (He said “no” to cake :() I can’t really think of anything that would cost an arm and a leg.. perhaps the flowers?
I don’t really know western, east/south asian weddings so my “demand” isn’t that big. I just know that I don’t want to wear red and I’m only going to have 2 or 3 functions

I know you weren’t “specifically” referring to me but it seemed like an attack.. I don’t want the moon or want a huge, heavy lengha etc. I just want to have a good experience and have fun with my husband and not be watched by so many people.. its embarrassing.

Kakee, don’t take it personally..

In traditional desi culture the bride got virtually no say in anything.. from choice of groom to choice of dress.. Just the fact she was getting a husband was meant to be ‘enough’.. Am sure no-one on here thinks along those extremes but that’s what a lot of our mums and grandmothers went thru so a bride having a real say in her wedding prep and being assertive can sometimes be seen as ‘rude’ or ‘arrogant’.. Even if it might be something as simple as just choosing her own dress :hinna: