1-What does Islam say about having a ‘Girlfriend’ by a man and having a ‘Boyfriend’ by a girl?
2-Is this allowed by islam and is it true that having a girlfriend of boyfriend is directly or indirectly a sin?
Feel free to define a ‘Girlfriend’ or ‘Boyfriend’ as you think.
3- My other question is that… Is it possible to have a ‘platonic’ (or platoonic) relationship between a man or a woman (male and a female)?
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Depends on too many factors, but generally, the common beleif is that it is not allowed.
It is often thought that all relationships that lead to forbidden sex are themselves forbidden, although some people believe only the actual act of sex is what is forbidden and not the relationship.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Seriously? lol..
No bfs/gfs (in th Paki/western sense) are not allowed. Platonic relationships, that may be pushing it, so I woudldn't say no way.. Generally speaking to fiance is allowed
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
It is often thought that all relationships that lead to forbidden sex are themselves forbidden, although some people believe only the actual act of sex is what is forbidden and not the relationship.
So, its fine to have relationship as long as sex does not occur..according to some people? This means platonic relationship is allowed by some.
What does islam say?
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
In Islam there is no such thing as premarital relationships. It is Haraam. It's clear and cut. We are in the real world and real life given by Allah, we should respect it ant NOT act as if it's a hindi movie.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
yeah...to my understanding...we shud always lower our gaze towards women that we can possibly marry. if u do dat...i dont think relationship is even possible.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Things have dramatically changed for the last couple of years. I belive that at all comes down to what a person feels about another individual. We live in a society where communication with the opposite sex is compuslory at some point of our lives. But as for a having a relationship with the opposite sex is concerned, this is indeed forbidden in Islam. Someone has said "So, its fine to have relationship as long as sex does not occur". Sex becomes ineivtable after, belive me I kid you not a person might start off by saying that I know my boundries and I will not cross them, but Satan is able to drive people to commmit unlawful acts which results in major sin. I belive that as far as relationships are concered its best to avoid them.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
What does islam say?
In Islam it is not allowed...PERIOD! who cares what "some people say". People say all kinds of things to justify their own actions.
In Islam you cant make what is haraam (prohibited) halal (permissible)and viice versa.
Quranic Verses:
"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and protect their private parts. That is purer for them. Verily Allah is All-Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and protect their private parts........" (24:30-31)
this is verse makes it very clear that a girlfriend boyfriend relationship is not allowed since it is not possible to lower one's gaze in such a relationship.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
A girlfriend is a 'friend' who happens to be a girl? Or A girlfriend is a 'girl' who happens to be a friend fulfilling the friendly needs? OR niether of these?
I think girlfriend and boyfriend do need to be defined in clear sense so we can understand what exactly are we talking about.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Thanks for the thought. I know many will deny this sentence.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
No bfs/gfs (in th Paki/western sense) are not allowed. Platonic relationships, that may be pushing it, so I woudldn't say no way.. Generally speaking to fiance is allowed
Can fiance take the advantage of the relation prematurely?
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Even a fiance isn't really a "fiancee" in the Western sense, that you can talk, meet, have fun with him etc etc.. i've read before that Islam does not technically recognize the relationship of a fiance, so until they are officially married, they are still na-mehrams (i hope I said that right). But one is allowed ot speak to them with the intent of marriage (and not HS/college type "intent", i.e., "oh yeah baby sure we'll get married--lets have sex--oh this relationship isnt working out). Again i'm not very positive as to how that would work, but this is what I have learned regarding marriage and Islam..
Islam isn't "difficult" it is practical.. I believe that if you have to speak to a man, be he a professor, employer, coworker, classmate , or someone asking for directions, then it's acceptable, as long as you do not cross the lines. (And then there are some who believe that women shouldn't even go to University or work or have careers but watever). I strongly believe that flirting is NOT allowed; talking to someone, sharing your experiences ot better educate someone on Islam or academics or career is acceptable to me (not sure Islamically though).
And about having companionship and friendship, if all you need is a friend or companionship, then why not someone of the same gender? :-| I do think that many guy-girl relationships will lead to more if they spend too much time together and shrae too much of themselves (emotionally/mentally, not just physically) together.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Islam isn't "difficult" it is practical.. I believe that if you have to speak to a man, be he a professor, employer, coworker, classmate , or someone asking for directions, then it's acceptable, as long as you do not cross the lines. (And then there are some who believe that women shouldn't even go to University or work or have careers but watever). I strongly believe that flirting is NOT allowed; talking to someone, sharing your experiences ot better educate someone on Islam or academics or career is acceptable to me (not sure Islamically though).
And about having companionship and friendship, if all you need is a friend or companionship, then why not someone of the same gender? :-| I do think that many guy-girl relationships will lead to more if they spend too much time together and shrae too much of themselves (emotionally/mentally, not just physically) together.
Good post. I personally think you used good sincere logic while posting this.:)
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
Try my best :)
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
You did. Thank you.:)
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
I think the common concept is that girlfriend and boyfriend engage or expected to engage in intimate relation...... true?
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
possibility is always there.
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
hey just thought of this, what about a gay man, can he be plutonic friend of women? is it allowed? he can never ask for any sexual relationship.
or Eunuchs, as we know in old times these people were allowed in the inner sanctums of the kings because they are supposedly harmless. (I doubt that though)
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
:)
lets define gf / bf if they are meeting to build a future with longterm
plans society should and must give them the benefit of the doubt
if they are just dating not allowed in ISLAM
If their freedom is being used for marriage plans to build that trust then
what ever is neccessary should be allowed them within limits.
Adults however are a diff story. :)
But intimacy is mandatory to some extent but the reason why they are
getting intimate should be first discussed and permitted for minors and
for adults should be discussed and defined before launching such moves :)
people come in all shapes and forms and some poeple take longer then
others to build that trurst and intimacy Some times it takes months to have
that confidence. I would like to have that opport to get to know my marriage
partner some day so that I understand them better before marraige :)inshallah :)
Re: Islam and Girlfriend or Boyfriend
What kind of intimacy with what limit?
You seem to have divided people into two groups minors and adults.
Perhaps the kind of intimacy you seem to think is permit for minors is playing games with each other or socializing activities...
Prior to marriage you can NEVER get to know the person except few outside habits or romantic careful sentences. Again define intimacy for better understanding of your post.
Sure. One has to know who one is getting married to. Dating and courting invloves activities which off course are not islamic.