is there any space for reconciliation here?

[ll_xx_ll]

Re: is there any space for reconciliation here?

@Deeba1234

So where are these examples of Pakistani women divorcing for ‘fun’?
Educated and/or wealthy middle + upper-class women might be more likely to divorce than those from poorer families but most sane ppl can see that’s usually because they’re less likely to be totally dependent on their husbands and/or their families might be more likely to support them rather than them being left to fend for themselves.

Bottom line is they divorce because as RV already mentioned they’re more aware that they have rights and are less likely to need to stay in bad marriages, not because it’s ‘fun’ or some sort of weird fashion to show how ‘modern’ they are.. Do ppl even realise how ridiculous that sounds??

^^thank you

there are very few women or even men for that matter who wud divorce for fun… (like the OPs bhabhi is seemingly doing) most women do it because they are in a bad/oppressive marriage and by that i dont mean that they decide they didnt have to cook in their parents home and in their in laws/hubby’s home they have to and therefore they are in a bad marriage…no they are truly in a bad marriage and thats why they walk out–the only thing is highly educated/independent woman are more likely to step out of a bad marriage because (as deeba said) they are independent (not dependent on the husband) and they dont have to worry about who’s gonna provide them with financial support for the rest of their lives if they leave their husband and cant find someone else to marry …not even they do it for fun or to make some kind of psycho fashion statement… thats a laughable idea,why wud any woman just do it for fun’s sake or to make a fashion statement when they know that the stigma of divorce for a woman is such that it is in desi society and why wud a woman get married in the first place if all she really wanted to do was divorce the person for her personal enjoyment? seriously? c’mon

perhaps u can say that some ppl end up throwing away a marriage for the tiniest of reasons…i would still venture to say that those people are:
a) in the tiniest of minority…
b) the tiniest of reason has become big because of of numerous other reasons and they have been unable to reconcile their differences due to lack of cooperation for either side
c) and/or we think its a tiny reason but we’re not the ones in the situation and this person may have many other valid/bigger reasons why they divorced

no one gets married and spends all that money…just so they can get a divorce…its not like its some kind of an award or a degree that everyone aspires to acheive… to think that someone does it for some kind of sick enjoyment of to make a statement is an extremely cynical and skewed viewpoint on the matter

@multinicked

so my dad called up her dad this morning (my dad doesnt live here in Pakistan) and told him that he came to know what happened yesterday and requested to discuss the issues and let bhabi come back home. her dad said ‘forget about it. chaar banday aap layen. chaar hum layengay, hum apki be-izzati karayngay, aap hamari karna, PHIR main SOCHOONGA aagay kya karna hai’ and my dad said ‘hum itnya ghattiya nahin hain. agay apki marzi’ and hung up.

finally,no more chances for any settlements. it is family court trips for 3 months before the divorce is applicable. sigh ! Maybe we had to get through this pain before we could get rid of the messed up family…she already blocked us all from her FB this morning and changed to her relationship status to ‘single’ ! good for us Alhamdulillah or we had to deal with them all our life !

She has some crockery and furniture left in upper part of the house. My dad is really annoyed now and said to disassemble it,pack it and move it to the porch and tell them to pick it up at their convenience because no one from them should dare to enter our home like they did yesterday when he cousin and brother opened up every cupboard and drawer of almost all rooms of our place to gather her stuff according to the list bhabi had made and gave them. my mom was in her room all the time,very upset,brother was at work when they suddenly turned up and I was left there to accompany them and felt like being under a search warrant. It was such an embarrassment to see how daringly they went to all the washrooms gathering her shampoos,ironing spray and what not (even taking ours,telling that she will sort out your stuff and send back) and still creating an issue that one of her artificial earring is missing ! kameenay loag !

I really feel that my family SHOULD agree to their demand of making whole family sit and listen to all this BS .. atleast their family will know how cheap they have been .. but my husband and mom say jitni izzat se sub ho jaye,utna acha hai when those people dont deserve any izzat at all anymore.

I told my husband about dad’s call and her FB status for my brother and said chalo ..tum logoan ki jaan chhooti..mainay tau roz dekhna hai dono ko apni workplace pe poor guy..he never knew things will turn this way and kept apologizing my mom to suggest this proposal to them on basis of his 6 yrs acquaintance with bhabi’s dad

wow i am sorry for this…i agree with nomi dont agree to a sit down in which all they wanna do is insult you