according to some people both male and female when a girl is being teased/ bothered by one guy or so its her own mistake… its her own behavior that let someone tease her by chasing, texting, calling or by other means that spoil her reputation…
whats your opinion about it?
today i heard one girl saying that if a guy try to talk to me I without wasting a moment insult him in such a way that he doesn’t even think to talk to me later on.
is this behavior appropriate?
if it is so then should the professional ladies such as Teachers, Doctors or others should adopt this behavior to avoid inviting negativity about them?
if it is so then should the professional ladies such as Teachers, Doctors or others should adopt this behavior to avoid inviting negativity about them?
No, teachers should wave a danda.....and doctors should menacingly hold up a lethal injection to ward off the teasing guys. Sirf insults se kaam nahin chalay ga. Akhir professional laug hain....apni field k khaas instruments ka istimaal karna chahiye!
Ab agar lady professional nahin hai.....(for example, housewife....or a student)....to belan ya jooti se bhi kaam chalaaya ja sakta hai.
And she should only feel guilty if the guy ends up in the hospital, varna it's all good.
what an absurd notion, insult every guy who talks to you to save yourself from them. I bet this girl is a lesbian. I’ve never heard of teachers, doctors being subjected to such ‘negativity’ on a daily basis.
Now now…let’s not be harsh. Maybe she just watched too many 80s-90s Bollywood movies. You know where the heroines would snap, “You raascal…you scoundrel…badmaash…tumhari yeh jurrat…yeh mera rumaal nahin hai!!!”
Although that usually backfired…because a few scenes later their dancing among the trees and then walking around the fire. She’s more likely to repel him if she chased him and gushed about how many children she wants with him and what their names will be.
Nah. Why "insult" people? That's ridiculous. It's possible to maintain clear boundaries by being polite yet firm.
Bottom line, let your conscience guide you in deciding how responsible you are in leading someone on. The answer is always clear if you are honest with yourself. Don't lie to yourself.
Nah. Why "insult" people? That's ridiculous. It's possible to maintain clear boundaries by being polite yet firm.
Bottom line, let your conscience guide you in deciding how responsible you are in leading someone on. The answer is always clear if you are honest with yourself. Don't lie to yourself.
You know, you're right and I agree with you but I don't think that works in Pakistan society at all... There's a reason for the saying, "hansi to phansi"..if a girl is even remotely nice or talks to a guy, they take it as an invitation to come on to them. This is what my female cousins tell me, that they are not friendly to everybody....what we take as being rude is them protecting themselves and frankly after hearing stories and seeing some things for myslef, i totally believe it.
Perosnally i dont' think theres any reason to be rude or insulting (unless it calls for it) BUT some guys are just stupid, they don't give up if you're "nice."
I dunno man, not smiling at a total stranger, but if a guy initiates contact and u dont tell them to fornicate themselves some dudes take it as a go ahead.
Imma share my story, I was on a crowded bus and a seat opened up…this guy let me sit down, i smiled and said thank you. he started talking to me and ultimately followed me from two bus changes and INTO MY BUILDING. Apparently he thought cz I politely smiled at him, that was an invitation to become a stalker. Freak.
I dunno man, not smiling at a total stranger, but if a guy initiates contact and u dont tell them to fornicate themselves some dudes take it as a go ahead.
Imma share my story, I was on a crowded bus and a seat opened up...this guy let me sit down, i smiled and said thank you. he started talking to me and ultimately followed me from two bus changes and INTO MY BUILDING. Apparently he thought cz I politely smiled at him, that was an invitation to become a stalker. Freak.
hahahah..funny story lol. but that guy was clearly a freak, who even does that? that's rare even for a desi.
hahahah..funny story lol. but that guy was clearly a freak, who even does that? that's rare even for a desi.
aisa nai hai. i wud say u dont know these deSis....i myself am a desi. i know whats happening here. one of my friend's elder sister who is teaching at an institute of boys. she is teaching the boys of BS and MS. and you won't believe that her phone number that she gave to a student who asked for extra help regarding studies was leaked out and now every other day someone texts her and says that he is one of her students and he is not a flirt but he really likes her smile, ear-rings, attire blah blah blah..... not only the students one day she got a sms from her colleague saying that she was looking so much pretty the other day. and she was surprised as she had never gave her number to that guy.....
aisa nai hai. i wud say u dont know these deSis....i myself am a desi. i know whats happening here. one of my friend's elder sister who is teaching at an institute of boys. she is teaching the boys of BS and MS. and you won't believe that her phone number that she gave to a student who asked for extra help regarding studies was leaked out and now every other day someone texts her and says that he is one of her students and he is not a flirt but he really likes her smile, ear-rings, attire blah blah blah..... not only the students one day she got a sms from her colleague saying that she was looking so much pretty the other day. and she was surprised as she had never gave her number to that guy.....
well there's no doubt that the percentage of desperate freaks is definitely higher here (depending on the institute of course, I doubt this would happen in a good university). hopefully your friend's sister has learned her lesson here, don't give out your phone number, even to your students.
If a student needs additional help, the professional/school email and phone number can be given. And it’s better to provide the additional help on the school campus. This is the TYPICAL method for communication between teachers and students in a secondary school setting.
I agree that it was wrong for that student to leak your friend’s phone number to other students. But you can’t put all the blame on the students either. Your friend should have been more careful and she should have thought of the consequences of giving her phone number out.
If it’s happening “every other day,” then your friend needs to change her number or get a new cell phone. Why is she even receiving calls from the students? If she was really that disturbed by the behavior of her students, then she should have changed her number after the first couple of times that the students were bothering her. She wouldn’t allow the problem to happen every other day. Someone might question if your friend secretly enjoys the compliments and attention she’s getting. If she lets this continue, it can bring about rumors and jeopardize her reputation and her job.
I think it is just polite since women of all ages have smiled at me. If I thought everyone of those aunties was after me then I don’t even want to imagine the situation. I guess it depends upon how much of a culture oriented person you are.
I think it is in Brazil or some other country in South America where women and men kiss each other frequently for greeting. This muslim head of a masjid was coy in a news story and said that it would be awkward if he didn’t go through with it with his female friends.
Now, I have seen it happen in America with some people as well, but I don’t think it is ok for some strange women to kiss-greet me. I don’t think much about shaking an extended hand of a woman, but it might be considered lewd in a conservative setting in Pakistan.
I completely agree with this! I will be polite to a certain extent, but I know where my boundries are. If someone crosses that then they unfortunetly will get an earful. I’d rather be the girl who is rude and thinks too highly of herself than the ‘slag’ that hits on everything that breathes. (the second example was extreme I know )
I'm embarrassed for Pakistani guys who are this f-ed up. I think a lot of this has to do with a combustible mix of conservative culture clashing with Bollywood with a dose of Western influences. I talk to a lot of people every day, from men to models to grandmas - if any one of them smiles or is pleasant, I wouldn't take that as some sort of romantic interest. Guys like that have messed things up for all men, by acting out on their creepy tendencies.
I have a lot of issues with how many Pakistani guys present themselves in public. From rolling out in packs, massive leering, to talking to women like they are sheep getting ready for slaughtered - all of this has to stop. You're making it awkward for the rest of us, who are looking to be social and enjoying things without every female thinking that a mack is in progress.
Ironically, I get women (Pakistani and others) thinking that I'm on some sort of a flirt crusade, just because I am usually positive and smiling. Weddings are the worst, every aunty is on you about whats up with the single status, what I do for a living, and if I am interested in in so and so (fingers pointing to the poor girl).
Sorry for the rant, I am not exactly happy about Pakistani who are perpetual line steppers.
@ redvelvet well said !
But honestly, if a girl you’d never spoken to before smiled at you, there’s obviously something there, no?
)