Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
I think discipline should be enforced and there should be a punishment for doing wrong. Even god works on those principles and He knows humans the best. I don't see myself hitting a child though...No cartoons for a week would do I guess.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Kaleem, bund tay ChapayR marni is not a little tap on the tushi. It can hurt.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Being the youngest in the family I got my fair share of smacking/beating from everyone, including the parents and it wasn't fun. The day they all realized that I am big enough to hit back they stopped and I became a better person too.
I want to build the kind of relationship with my children where they don't do wrong things because they love me, not because they fear me. While fear works and works well in many cases, it has major side effects that are just not worth it.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Madhanee yaar, sometimes its a necessary evil. Its much better than what I was raised up on. Look, I love my father very much, and I remember some of the ass whoppings so vivdly that I can tell you exactly where the peshawri chappal landed, which gaali I ran to when I knew that ass whopping is on its way. And some will argue, but there is nothing wrong with me. :)
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Tapping them is not the same as smacking them. Parents rarely tap their kids, its usually a hard slap. Ive seen it myself. And as far as I have seen it does not work. Kids learn that if they (as per your example) try to get to the electric socket, they will be slapped. And for the same example, there are many ways to make such things as electric sockets safe and child proof.
When you smack, kids do not learn that if they try to touch it, it will harm them. They relate doing wrong to your smacks, not to why the thing is wrong to start with.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Ahmadjee, they have shrinks for that.
Again, I am not saying to beat them up all the time. Sometimes it is necessary and the only thing left to do.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Kaleem Yaar, I think you and I should compare our tushis. I wish I could post some pics. My dad and others used my ass as if it was soccer ball and they were playing for the world cup. My older sister tried strangling me many times (she thought I was a monkey, and she would tie a Nala around my neck and ask me to dance).
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Ok MQ, i thought people here were smart enough to fill in the blanks...but apparently not. You dont just spank them. You explain to them before the warning, why you want them to stop playing with the electric socket...lets say 25 times, than you give a warning. You explain the same thing while and after spanking another 20 times and ask them if they understood why they were smacked. Trust me those little devils do understand....
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
FF dont you be getting any ideas. It aint gonna work with Roman. :D
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Kaleem--Realistically speaking you're not going to warn them 25 times. or 20 times afterwards.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
He's a harmless little thing Kaleem, why would I want to strangle him? And I don't think seeing him dance will be an enticing sight either.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
MQ, the numbers are a bit exaggarated (sp?) but its close. I will say at least 10 before and 10 after. Plus, why are we concentrating on the numbers? It works...take my word for it , short of you coming down and visiting my girls.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
FF, I think you are ignoring the point....never mind. If you do happen to see that little harmless thing tell him I said Salaam and he should send me a PM or something.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
lol. Well when I see kids, my heart just melts. But my parents never believed in hitting and I turned out just fine. :o
Well if you give 20 warnings. Thats still a lot. Maybe you need to work on your tone.Goodness I didnt have to give that many warnings even while I was teaching the little (adorable) devils.And not 3 of them , but 20.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Kaleem bhai, we are all product of our experiences, so while you have experienced the little smacking work well there is no arguing with you about it. I have seen it work and gone down right bad and so I can't take my chances.
It's kind like smokin' .. a little a day will probably not hurt you much, but it doesn't make the practice a necessary evil to calm the nerves.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
^^ Oh but of course it does. Wanna see.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Definately keen on smacking. But I also believe in good cop / bad cop parenting so I would never smack my kids, I'd leave that to my wife :D
My parents ran the good cop / bad cop routine. My mother would smack me when I did something wrong (which frankly, though I hated it at the time, I now view as being absolutely crucial in my discipline today). My father would never slap me, but instead took on the good cop role and would use the threat of my mother to discipline me (and it worked). Sort of like "Unless you stop doing that, I'll tell your mother".
Nothing wrong with relying on reasoning with a child. But children are fundamentally not reasonable and stronger measures are required. Only from ages 11 and up are physical means of discipline no longer applicable at all.
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
So does that smacking include a leather whip or belt? Or do you just prefer a good old fashioned club with nails in it?
Re: Is smacking children an effective form of discipline?
Be traditional - chappal 