Is she a good bahu or its just that she got an easy pitch to play on?

[Reha]

Re: Is she a good bahu or its just that she got an easy pitch to play on?

@Ashy2010

So its my aunty’s bahu. Its been more than a year since they got married. We have been hearing so many tareefain and praises of her bahu.

**
Bahu’s background:**

1. Has been living in large joint family in a small house
2. Middle class family with only one bread-winner, i.e. bahu’s father

Susraal’s background:

1. Small family with just two sons, so no nand for the bahu and no previous bahu in the family
2. Everyone’s working in the family so financially very well settled as compared to Bahu’s family
3. Big house as compared to bahu’s parent’s house
4. High social status as compared to bahu’s family
5. Since no daughter and no previous bahu in the family, she immediately became everyone’s favourite. Her husband, her brother-in-law, her MIL and her FIL.

The bahu is not working, is a home-maker, is giving her 200% in managing the house, remembers the names of her MIL and FIL’s medicines, doing their khidmat etc. The in-laws are extremely happy with the bahu.

She is really doing great. But what I feel is that she **ACTUALLY **got an easy pitch to play on. Since there is no daughter or elder bahu in the family, the family was really happy when they finally had a girl in their home. She immediately became daughter to her MIL and FIL and sister to her BIL. The bahu didn’t have any competition so whatever she is doing is being appreciated by her in-laws alot.

Now, since she already has set the criteria and standard, I think the second bahu will have a hard time in making her place in the family because she will be compared with the first bahu for everything.

Does a girl’s chances of becoming good or bad bahu depend more on the situation than her nature? I think any girl can be a good bahu in the above mentioned circumstances.

You know what scares me about marriage? The above post.

If she does a great job…its not because she IS a great bahu or a good person or working so hard. Its because she got an easy pitch. A free ride. No competition.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to make a place in a family for yourself? She is working hard and doing a stellar job and others like yourself are analyzing her poor background and low social status. Everything that you describe above…that you admittedly fear you cannot do…and you still think she got an easy pitch? Really?

You fear you cannot do what she does but somehow because SHE is doing it and because she comes from a lower income bracket…its easy for her?

You didn’t feel any shame writing such things about someone who did nothing to you?

I am disappointed.