Is it okay to have an affair if your spouse doesnt make you happy?

[YourLaddu]

Re: Is it okay to have an affair if your spouse doesnt make you happy?

@Mirch

You can easily take care of this issue. When he gets ready to go out to hang out with his buddies , you tag along with him and take the kids with you too. Is it not an option too ? If the answer is yes then the plan B is to you get out of house with kids to go and hang around to a mall or with your buddies before he does, if you do not have any friends and buddies make some . You can get some good ideas on how to make some good friends in some GS threads on this topic. I am sure after a few times he would get the hint heck he might get the hint the first time you do any of the above.

An your original question was , is it OK to have an affair and you wanted to keep the religion aside. I gave you the honest answer that it is not OK under any circumstances and gave to 101 reasons already.

Okay, the issue with tagging along is when I suggest it…he acts like Im accusing him of cheating on me. Vahan kisi aur ki biviyan to nahin ati hain - is what he says. He is not open to spending time with me alone…its so weird.

@princessjojo

I really do feel for you. It’s an unfortunate and unfair situation, but still you should understand that two wrongs don’t make a right..

Do you already have someone in mind who you think can give fulfil the emotional void?

Have you talked about your feelings with your husband?

Does your husband have unmarried friends?

No, I have no one in mind at all.

Yes, many times but it falls on deaf ears. He doesnt see a problem and I see so many. He thinks Im sensitive and over react…I dont see that at all because I barely have any time with him in the first place.

He has a split of friends…half are unmarried and half are married. The unmarried friends get him to smoke a lot. I hate it when he smokes. The married friends usually end up leaving early from their get togethers…in fact a lot dont even show up as regularly as he does.

@Scarface

I think it’s okay to have an affair in such a situation.

Thanks Scarface

@Mrs_Saieen

But have you even tried to change things for the better?

If you just wnat someone to talk to, you can find plenty of friends, counselors etc. but if what you want is for someone to desire you romantically…and yes every woman should have a right to that..but your first priority should be to strengthen the relationship between you and your spouse

What can I do more? Talk to him? Dress up? Im a very put together sort of girl…I dont dress like a slob, get my hair done every 6 weeks, nails are always in good shape, etc.

Yeah, I want him to desire me.

@philosophy

scarface and i agree. it must be okay.

Thank you philosophy

@Pataka

only thing i can say, karma’s a b****.

It’s not wrong for you to want to talk to someone but the way you are going about it or thinking about it is wrong.

If he doesn’t talk to you, think about you then force him to. Do something that will catch his attention. This is the man you married. He is the father of your children. Doesn’t he deserve a bit more respect than to be cheated on?

And if you really cared about your children, you would understand that talking to some other man is NOT an option.

Coming back to karma, if you chose to emotionally attach yourself to someone else, it’s not going to have a good outcome.

@Reha

Do you love him?

Unfortunately, I do.

I do respect him - a lot. I care for him, do everything he asks of me and my only request is to just give me some company every so often. He doesnt even watch the kids.

@MissTY

Do what makes you happy. everyone has a right to be happy.

Thank you MissTY

@Nisha25

if you’re so set on having an affair and there’s no way to convince you otherwise, i guess you aren’t willing to try marriage counseling or giving your marriage and husband another chance, then i just hope your husband doesn’t have a violent temper. If he finds out about this affair how will he react, hopefully not by physically hurting you

You know what Nisha…Im not even all that set on having an affair anymore. Im just disappointed with how things are turning out. Two people that live together but dont talk much. Who lives like that?

I dont think I will have an affair because that would require hurting my children and I cannot do that. Why make it worse?