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not for a muslim woman, but also for a man....
From what I know its sunnah but not mandatory. However, its stressed so much that its said if a muslim person marries they complete the other half of their religion.
^ any reference?
Marriage is a religious duty and it is a social necessity because through marriage, families are established and the family is the fundamental unit of our society.
*According to Imams Abu Hanifah, Ahmad ibn Hanbal and Malik ibn Anas, marriage is recommendatory, however in certain individuals it becomes wajib/obligatory. Imam Shaafi’i considers it to be nafl or mubah (preferable). The general opinion is that if a person, male or female fears that if he/she does not marry they will commit fornication, then marriage becomes “wajib”. If a person has strong sexual urges then it becomes “wajib” for that person to marry. Marriage should not be put off or delayed especially if one has the means to do so. *
The general principle is that prophet sallalahu alayhi wasalam enjoined up in the followers to marry. He said “when a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion , so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.” This hadith is narrated by Anas.
Dai
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*Originally posted by batameez: *
wajib/obligatory ~~~ a must?
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Batmez, the above words in italics explains when it is Wajib!
I posted this topic up a long time ago...and I checked out other sources, and it seems that its not obligatory (like doing Hajj or fasting) but its a big priority. However, it is common sense and plain mathematics that, inevitably, some people will be "left over" and remain unmarried for whatever reasons.
The only reason that comes to my mind is that one has a job that is too time-consuming to allow one to have a healthy family (ex. neurologists have the highest divorce rates out of all doctors), or that one never got a good rishtaa - which DOES happen. I have two aunts and some cousins who never got good rishtas because they were career-oriented women. They chose not to give up their careers. Other girls I know just aren't getting good rishtas because of the way they look etc.
I myself have never gotten a rishtaa yet (in memon tradition girls start getting rishtas when they are 16ish) and its mainly because my parents aren't social with the local desi community, so most families dont even know i exist...and it'll probably stay that way. So, what if no one ever proposes to me? And what if I never meet a guy suitable for marriage? Does that mean I'm going to hell? I hope not!
First of all, like Dai ji said, it s not a MUST, but it is prefered.
and secondly, it s normal to have rishta s on the age of 16ish??? 
thats is something I condemn, because 16ish is still 40-50 % kid like.
And 3e ly, U Pgudia, u dont sound like some one old, and it is not correct to think the way u do.
My own sister got her first rishta when she was 24, she refused that one cuz she wanst to become a Neuro Surgeon. The 3 one she got was when she was 27 and then she said yes.
I know some other baji s and they got married when the were 30/31.
So I dont think its ‘abnormal’ when rishtas come @ an age of even 30.(talking about ladies )
But perhaps its aur culture, because the few apkistani girls I know start talking about marriage when they r (i think ) too young.
But the dutch girls I know, focus more on a career like Sista ji said.
again the culture to blaim? 
Prae - notice I said "in memon tradition" when I was talking about rishtas at the age of 16. For the record, I have no problem with being single at 19. And I dont have a problem being single when I'm 30. And I dont have a problem being single when I'm 50.
I don't think choosing to remain a spinster for the sake of career is religiously sanctioned in Islam.
Being forced to remain unmarried for lack of men is unfortunate and is an indication of societal failure, during normal times. Although, arguably this can happen in case of wars when men die in large numbers, and perhaps is one situation where multiple marriages would make sense to allow all women to get married and procreate.
One can argue that it would seem like a normal human desire i.e. to get married and have children, and Islam is a very natural deen. :~)
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*Originally posted by PyariCgudia: *
Prae - notice I said "in memon tradition" when I was talking about rishtas at the age of 16. For the record, I have no problem with being single at 19. And I dont have a problem being single when I'm 30. And I dont have a problem being single when I'm 50.
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PLease dont mind, but I thought u did cuz of the following sentences, so again I m sorry and what I wrote wsnt meant as an attack
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myself have never gotten a rishtaa yet (in memon tradition girls start getting rishtas when they are 16ish) and its mainly because my parents aren't social with the local desi community, so most families dont even know i exist...and it'll probably stay that way. So, what if no one ever proposes to me? And what if I never meet a guy suitable for marriage? Does that mean I'm going to hell? I hope not!
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I don't think choosing to remain a spinster for the sake of career is religiously sanctioned in Islam.
I'm going to take into consideration that you are a man and cannot possibly totally understand what it is to be a career-oriented woman.
No one is talking about CHOOSING to remain a spinster because of a career, rather that MANY MEN cannot swallow having working wives...and as a result, working women in some desi cultures still face problems in marriage. My aunts are now in their 50's and when they started their careers - working women were a big taboo. Now things have changed and more men are okay with their wives working...however a lot of guys still aren't and a lot of girls are still having problems getting rishtaas.
Not to mention divorcees who have problems remarrying. Note: this is a flaw in our culture, not religion.
Dai_sista ... i see
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PCG... I am afraid, from a Islamically-correct perspective it will not be possible to accept thats its ok for a woman to remain unmarried because she wanted to have a career and found no man who is willing to accept that.
I am sure it happened. I can empathize with your point and being a reasonable person can attempt to justify it as well, just as you did, but...
Its just that in life's many balancing acts, this does not seem to be Islamically justifiable. Then again, I am no expert in this field of fiqh, so I will just say that to me it doesn't appear to have passed the litmus test of acceptable Islamic behavior. This is a personal opinion and gut feeling only. Not some religious fatwa.
I'm curious faisal - what is your advice to women who are in college or in grad school or already well into their career and who are not getting any rishtaas or any good ones?
Would you recommend they wait and see what God gives them...or do you think they ought to drop their career?
I have yet to meet a single girl with that kinda dilemma.... on the contrary I have seen some married couples, where the husband actually wants the wife to get some more education and get some decent job, now that the kids are all in school, but the lady is enjoying the life so much, that she couldn't be bothered.
However, hypothetically, if a girl is in a career and a proposal comes for a guy who is acceptable in every other way, and the guy creates a stipulation that the girl should not work after marriage.. all things being equal I will advise the girl to let the guy worry about the bills and she should marry him. She can always work on her husband after marriage to make him change his opinion on this issue.
Ofcourse, I would say, I have met more men who are actually looking forward to have wives who are working women, and the remaining won't mind the extra income as well.
shud try ur best and if didn't succeed then who can blame you