Do you consider family important even if they were never there for you? Would you still be there for them? Or is there a line and once that’s been crossed there’s no going back?
Re: Is family important?
There is a line, even if they cross it 100 times I would make sure that I was the one that kept going back ...
Re: Is family important?
Family is as important as water for human being
Re: Is family important?
Aawww. Sweet.
loyalty](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=loyalty)
Re: Is family important?
Family is as important as water for human being
I'm writing this down.
Re: Is family important?
Family is as important as water for human being
Yeah they drink you down then pee you out.
Re: Is family important?
lulz](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=Lulz) Depends
Is family important?
Immediate family like parents, grandparents, siblings, nephew/nieces. Rest can go to hell for all I care
Re: Is family important?
Do you consider family important even if they were never there for you? Would you still be there for them? Or is there a line and once that's been crossed there's no going back?
You will be hurt by family time and time again because there tends to be greater laxity in the relationships with people you live with. So, I totally acknowledge that family will piss you off now and then. But what I don't understand is the "never there for you" bit. Are you 100% certain that they have "never" been there for you? Like 0% ...zip, zilch, nada? We didn't fend for ourselves as babies. Someone fed and clothed us and took care of basic needs. Even if parents failed to provide emotional nourishment, they do provide you with basic survival needs and then some....so there's always something you could be grateful to them for. Unless family has incurred a grave injustice or oppression..that would warrant distancing yourself from them.
Re: Is family important?
Yeah they drink you down then pee you out.
LMAO!!
Re: Is family important?
You will be hurt by family time and time again because there tends to be greater laxity in the relationships with people you live with. So, I totally acknowledge that family will piss you off now and then. But what I don't understand is the "never there for you" bit. Are you 100% certain that they have "never" been there for you? Like 0% ...zip, zilch, nada? We didn't fend for ourselves as babies. Someone fed and clothed us and took care of basic needs. Even if parents failed to provide emotional nourishment, they do provide you with basic survival needs and then some....so there's always something you could be grateful to them for. Unless family has incurred a grave injustice or oppression..that would warrant distancing yourself from them.
So if they were abusive while they clothed and fed you as a baby you should still be grateful?
Re: Is family important?
So if they were abusive while they clothed and fed you as a baby you should still be grateful?
Define abusive. Even sarcasm falls under the abuse category and is considered verbal/emotional abuse....something we're all guilty of. So, you need to be specific. In some homes, spanking a child is not considered abuse whereas for others it warrants a call to social services.
Yes, you can STILL be grateful to your parents for feeding, clothing and educating you. A just, fair-minded human being can give credit where it's due....even if they can't give 100% credit.
People are able to thank their backstabbing friend, their jerk of a boss, their cheating significant other (and the list can go on) for teaching them valuable life lessons and making them stronger. And if people can thank others for a negative experience that shaped them, they can surely give credit to their parents for caring enough to feed and clothe you amongst other basic survival needs.
Re: Is family important?
yes..because when theyre gona be gone i dont want to regret. so from my side..there will always be an attempt to be good to them.
however, we shouldn't forget that sometimes our families/parents/siblings dont appreciate or reciprocate the efforts..everyone has different priorities...and its imp to just look at these things practically. it's not always your fault, no matter what parents/culture tells you
Re: Is family important?
Define abusive. Even sarcasm falls under the abuse category and is considered verbal/emotional abuse....something we're all guilty of. So, you need to be specific. In some homes, spanking a child is not considered abuse whereas for others it warrants a call to social services.
Yes, you can STILL be grateful to your parents for feeding, clothing and educating you. A just, fair-minded human being can give credit where it's due....even if they can't give 100% credit.
People are able to thank their backstabbing friend, their jerk of a boss, their cheating significant other (and the list can go on) for teaching them valuable life lessons and making them stronger. And if people can thank others for a negative experience that shaped them, they can surely give credit to their parents for caring enough to feed and clothe you amongst other basic survival needs.
I guess that's the difference between most the people you're talking about who forgive non-family members and people like me. I don't really forgive, unless of course your family but even that has a line although I do believe one shouldn't turn there back on family, even if they do.
Either way. I think you're giving to much emphasis to clothing and feeding. Those are years you don't remember anything and there are circumstances which one shouldn't forgive a family member for.
I wouldn't say my parents moulded me or gave me life lessons. It's all about how you perceive things. I'm sure your parents did a lot for you. Lucky you.
Re: Is family important?
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Re: Is family important?
i think forgiving does a person good...but you don't have to forget...just move on and not let it effect you
Re: Is family important?
i think forgiving does a person good...but you don't have to forget...just move on and not let it effect you
I get you but we all live different lifes with different stories. I think its hard to forgive a family member when they rip your family apart into a million pieces. There are just some things that can never be forgiven but I agree. You don't have to forgive or forget. Just move on and time passing makes it irrelevant to your current life.
Re: Is family important?
I guess that's the difference between most the people you're talking about who forgive non-family members and people like me. I don't really forgive, unless of course your family but even that has a line although I do believe one shouldn't turn there back on family, even if they do.
Either way. I think you're giving to much emphasis to clothing and feeding. Those are years you don't remember anything and there are circumstances which one shouldn't forgive a family member for.
I wouldn't say my parents moulded me or gave me life lessons. It's all about how you perceive things. I'm sure your parents did a lot for you. Lucky you.
MahaAllah, Alhumdolillah...I can't thank Allah enough for my parents...even despite turbulent times.
I respectfully disagree with you about the not remembering bit. Even if you couldn't remember those times, you could also have been left for dead, abandoned, so severely physically tortured. But after your infancy, you were capable of remembering and even if majority of those memories were painful, there have to be things you could be grateful to your parents for. You are now talking about forgiveness. I don't think gratitude depends upon forgiveness. It's not necessary for one to feel love or even a strong emotional connection with another person to be grateful for an act of kindness they showed.
Re: Is family important?
MahaAllah, Alhumdolillah...I can't thank Allah enough for my parents...even despite turbulent times.
I respectfully disagree with you about the not remembering bit. Even if you couldn't remember those times, you could also have been left for dead, abandoned, so severely physically tortured. But after your infancy, you were capable of remembering and even if majority of those memories were painful, there have to be things you could be grateful to your parents for. You are now talking about forgiveness. I don't think gratitude depends upon forgiveness. It's not necessary for one to feel love or even a strong emotional connection with another person to be grateful for an act of kindness they showed.
There probably are things which one should be grateful to their parents for but that's another topic. This thread is about if family is important to you, not if you should be grateful to them for wiping your backside when you couldn't thus the question relies on forgiveness and not gratefulness unless you're talking about them being grateful that even after all their mistakes, you still have their back. But you're saying that one should be grateful, not them being grateful. There's a difference, your using gratefulness the other way around and I don't believe it to have any bearing to the question.
Re: Is family important?
you may not be important to your family for whatever valid or invalid reasons, your family should be important to you because keeping the blood relationships intact is Allah's order for you...you get tremendous sawaab for that...if your family wants to miss on that sawaab, it's their loss.
Allah says in Qur'aan that you must not sever your relationship with your blood relatives [silla e reHmii].