Intolerance Towards Opinionated Girls in Desi Culture

[Niksik]

Re: Intolerance Towards Opinionated Girls in Desi Culture

I wish I practiced what I preached

[sidra87]

Jimmy and I are curious to hear this story! please share :)

@Sara516

I gave an opinion and that got me out of a rishta. :@:

[Sara516]

@Sara516

I gave an opinion and that got me out of a rishta. :@:

@sidra87

Jimmy and I are curious to hear this story! please share :)

I think I said something like, Muslims in the US have a much harder time than Muslims in Pakistan, and that I will never live in a joint family :@:

[soni27]

Opinionated does not equal argumentative. I think some posters don't realise the difference.

where there are opinions..there are differences in opinions..

and where there are differences in opinions there are arguments..

[Elegance]

Re: Intolerance Towards Opinionated Girls in Desi Culture

I have realized that how much it's irritating when you have to sit quietly during the first days of marriage :( people are strange, first they want you to sit like a statue then they expect that you talk to them otherwise it will be considered rude if you don't talk and give company to them :s

I couldn't pose for long. If I feel like talking I talk but when I want to be quiet then I try not to talk much no matter what the other people say.

[LP]

@Miss_Noland

Why is that? Why don’t desis like opinionated girls? A girl is not to express her opinions in front of family guests, it is considered rude.. I was at my fiance’s place, he had some guests coming over. He told me beforehand to keep my voice down (or better yet not talk at all) and just quitely sit there looking like a doll. WTH?

I am opinionated but I am not disrespectful but somehow our Desi culture fails to know the difference, why?

Not all desis.
As long as you express your opinion in a respectful manner & know when to stop then there is no problem at all.
aur baaqi dont bother.

[LP]

@Niksik

It’s great to have an opinion but the key is to share it at the right time and place.

Originally Posted by Man with a Plan
Its not like Desi people oppose opinionated Desi Girls. You just have to know when to speak up and say your point of view. There may be many people in the crowd or gathering that are much older than you. When I am in a gathering with my elders I do not speak up or oppose their opinion because they are older than me. You just have to listen to them properly and tell them your story in a way that makes them feel that you are not challenging them.

well said both of u

[stoppit]

where there are opinions..there are differences in opinions..

and where there are differences in opinions there are arguments..

But you can have an opinion and voice it without getting into an argument about it.

An argumentative person will voice contrary opinion at every turn just to start an argument.

-

If people want an example, just pop down to the wedding thread where some girls have asked what to do because their family is not letting them even choose their dress, which is something very personal; "girls aren't supposed to have an opinion on this. you wear what we decide".
I know the guys won't think it's a big deal but if a girl can't even say "I want this colour or that dress", what does that say about more important decisions in life?

[mrSoft]

Re: Intolerance Towards Opinionated Girls in Desi Culture

Welcome to Pakistani Marriage.

The first rule of Pakistani Marriage is: you do not have an opinion in Pakistani Marriage.

The second rule of Pakistani Marriage is: you DO NOT have an opinion in Pakistani Marriage!

Third rule of Pakistani Marriage: if you yells "stop...", "no...", or "but what about...", the rishta is over.

Fourth rule: only two heads can take part in discussion.

Fifth rule: one of the two cannot be you, the wife.

Sixth rule: the Pakistanis are simple minds. Not alot of logic, no alot of fairness, no alot of equality.

Seventh rule: Pakistanis will go on as long as they have to.

And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at a rishta, you have to STAY QUIET.